


hope i never lose you (hope it never ends)

by jenkook



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Awkward Crush, Awkward Flirting, Crushes, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, F/F, Fluff, Lisoo, Mutual Pining, Oblivious, Red Velvet, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, bts cameo, chaennie, exo cameo, like so much fluff, this is a twicepinkvelvet only event, twice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-03
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:14:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 84,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21658132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenkook/pseuds/jenkook
Summary: Park Chaeyoung moves to New York in hopes of pursuing her lifelong dream as a musician. She rents an apartment on Cornelia Street and somewhere along the way she falls in love with Jennie Kim. However, fame comes with a price. One that could cost Chaeyoung the love of her life. Faced with a difficult decision, Chaeyoung must solve the age-old question: what is more important, success or happiness?
Relationships: Jennie Kim/Park Chaeyoung | Rosé, Kim Jisoo/Lalisa Manoban | Lisa
Comments: 14
Kudos: 70





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> this story is based on taylor swift's song 'cornelia street' from her album 'lover.' i heard it and immediately thought 'how can i make this about chaennie?'. anyway i hope you enjoy :D

Initially, Chaeyoung's parents were dubious about letting her move to New York, let alone to pursue her dream of becoming a musician. Both of them knew how much it meant to their daughter. Ever since Chaeyoung was old enough to talk she had been singing, ever since she was old enough to sit up at the piano she had been playing and ever since she learned how to strum a guitar it had been one of the greatest pleasures in her life. As she got older, music became less of an avocation and more her lifeblood. She would spend hours locked away in her room scribbling songs in her battered leather notebook. On a night, she would creep downstairs to play on her father's piano until the early hours. It soon became noticeable that music had taken over Chaeyoung's life. She struggled with her studies, paid less attention in school and spent all her time figuring out melodies and singing herself hoarse.

She joined the church choir when she was eight years old, along with her older sister Alice. Soon, it became clear which one of the siblings had an affinity for it. Alice soon dropped out but Chaeyoung kept going until she was in her teens. Her parents paid for music lessons twice a week, on a Wednesday it was guitar and on a Friday it was piano. Her music teacher also taught her a few vocal techniques too. Mr Wheeler recognised Chaeyoung's talent the minute he sat down and asked her to play whatever piece she already knew.

Eventually, Chaeyoung managed to buckle down in high school and bring her grades out on top. She graduated with one of the highest GPA's in her senior class, setting her well on the way to university. However, much to her parent's dismay she did not want a conventional degree such as in law or medicine; she wanted to study the arts. As much as they tried to dissuade her, they could not. Chaeyoung spent four years at the university of Melbourne studying the arts and when she left she felt no less fulfilled than when she had first began.

So, no, it was no surprise she wanted to take this leap. The only issue was that so many people went over to America to make it big, and only a minuscule percentage ever did make it. Her parents did not outwardly tell her this in fear of breaking her heart. But she was twenty-two and ultimately she was an adult, therefore she was under no obligation to take their advice.

And she did not.

It took months to arrange. Every waking moment Chaeyoung would pore over the internet and study the city. They had been once on a family vacation when she was thirteen and it was her favourite place in the world. There was no mistaking that New York was the city for her. L.A seemed too superficial, she had a feeling she would not fit in there. New York was just as quirky as her, it was just as progressive as she needed it to be in order to become accepted. It was certainly the right place to aim for. Aim high she did.

She found a small apartment in a place called Cornelia Street in the province of Manhattan, an area known as West Village. The estate agent described it as 'cosy and charming' meaning it was tiny and needed work. Chaeyoung could work with that. She was no stranger to hard work and refused to turn away from a challenge. Immediately after the virtual tour, she put down the deposit. That meant she would be moving to New York in two months, which is when it became all the more serious.

Her job hunt online unfortunately came up fruitless, yet she held no hope it would be successful. Of course there would be a bump in the road because the whole situation too good to be true. She decided it would be best to look around while she is there. New York is one of the biggest, most sprawling cities in the world. There will be an abundance of jobs out there for an intelligent woman like Chaeyoung. Whether they are jobs she would _like_ to do is an entirely different story.

Before she left, her and Alice took a road trip around Australia. It only lasted a week or so, mainly they travelled through the outback. It was less about taking in the barren landscape and more about spending time with one another. It became too real for Alice that her baby sister was really moving to New York and suddenly it began to feel like the end of an era. A closing chapter on their childhood, on what they've ever known. Chaeyoung is brave, she must commend her sister on this. Slightly foolish? Perhaps. Has her head in the clouds? Absolutely. Determined? The most stubborn there was.

She will be just fine.

And she is, until it is the night before moving day. Suddenly, that is when it becomes all too real. All day she has been rushing around her apartment ensuring everything is packed because once she is on that plane there is no turning back. Perhaps she has not completely broken down yet because there is still that modicum of possibility this is not real- that when she goes to sleep she will wake up in her college dormitory and this will all have been a lucid dream. A small part of her wishes this will be the outcome. cCaeyoung is not entirely sure if she is ready to grow up just yet.

Sleep evades her that night. The hours drag past agonisingly slow as Chaeyoung stares at her ceiling, twiddling her thumbs in boredom. Every so often she will turn her head to look at her alarm clock. Twelve hours to go. Eleven. Seven. Five. Oh god it is getting too close.

Eventually, the shrill shriek of her alarm pierces through the darkness. Chaeyoung's stomach lurches into action as she dashes to the bathroom to throw up. Her nerves keep her anchored to the bathroom floor, slumped helplessly on the tiles. She is not ready for this. What was she thinking?

Is it too late to turn back?

Chaeyoung manages to haul herself to her feet, staggering forward on trembling knees and leaning against the bathroom counter for support. Looking up, she takes in her appearance. Pasty, colourless skin, purple rings accentuating her swollen brown eyes and the tip of her nose is bright red from tears she did not know she had shed. This is hardly the impression she wants to make when she steps out of the plane onto American soil. In a way, Chaeyoung feels like if she accepts defeat before she even gets on the plane, then her move will be pointless. That if she dooms it from the beginning, then it will indeed be futile. She has to remain optimistic. She needs this change- craves it. Her life is so tiresome, Chaeyoung is cut out for something more than bumbling along in Melbourne. Her soul knows she belongs on the stage. Or, if her career turns out to be unsuccessful; she belongs in the bustling city of New York. She belongs in the excitement, in the lights, in the thick of it.

It does not take her long to cover up her blemishes with makeup. A dab of foundation to give her face some colour, a coat of mascara and a dab of coloured lip balm. Although she wants to look fresh, she also recognises she has a twenty-one hour flight ahead of her with multiple stops.

With an hour to spare before her parents come to take her to the airport, Chaeyoung gives her apartment one last recce. She is having a difficult time realising that this is the last time she will ever see her humble abode. Although it did not feel like home at first- mainly due to Chaeyoung's unhappiness with her life- it feels like it now. At the last moment. When it is too late. The phrase 'you never know what you have until it's gone' springs to mind.

Chaeyoung has met the tenants who will be moving in tomorrow. A couple who are expecting their first baby. They were all glassy-eyed with excitement and rosy cheeked when viewing the apartment, whispering in awe about how it was their dream starter home. At least it is someone's dream, Chaeyoung thinks. Even if it wasn't good enough for her, it will be for someone else.

Before long, she receives a text from Alice alerting her they are outside. The day before they had taken the liberty of packing the majority of Chaeyoung's luggage into her father's pickup truck, while the rest of her furniture is currently on a plane waiting to greet her at her new apartment; all that leaves her is a backpack with her essentials. For a moment, she lingers in the doorway of her apartment with a heavy sense of dread in her stomach and a tug of longing in her heart- she wishes she had made her life work here, she wishes she was not having to seek a new start in New York. Then, she flicks off the lights and locks the door behind her with the finality of someone closing the door on a life they no longer want to be a part of.

Her family are subdued when she gets into the truck. Her mother cannot even bring herself to greet her daughter, her throat swollen with emotion. Her father nods at her, catching her eye in the rearview mirror and Alice simply takes her hand and places it on her lap- like she can't bear ever letting go of her little sister.

"Guys," Chaeyoung says, her own voice cracking. "I'm going to be fine."

"We know, honey," her father says. "We're just going to miss you."

Truthfully, Chaeyoung is having a difficult time understanding where they are coming from. Even though they only live at other ends of the city, they don't really see each other a lot. Chaeyoung visits her parents every few weeks, mostly keeping in touch through phone calls and Skype- like she will be doing when she moves. The person she sees the most is Alice. Their weekly girls days will be greatly missed by Chaeyoung.

"Did you remember to say goodbye to Chanyeol?" Alice asks, suddenly.

Chaeyoung rolls her eyes. "Yes, of course I remembered. I saw him yesterday."

Inseparable since childhood, Chaeyoung considers Chanyeol her best friend aside from her sister. Their mother's worked at the same offices and had known each other in high school, so it was almost inevitable their children would follow their footsteps and become friends. Although Chanyeol's mother had hoped for a daughter, she was ecstatic when her son was born. Five years later, Chaeyoung was born. Although their mother's were worried the age gap would cause concern, it did not. Chanyeol looked out for Chaeyoung in a way a big brother would- something she had little experience of but knew it was in his intrinsic nature to take care of her in such a manner.

Truthfully, their parents had always secretly anticipated to fall in love and become the epitome of childhood sweethearts and a high-school romance. Unfortunately for them, from a young age, Chaeyoung quickly learned that she harboured no attraction for Chanyeol- or any man, for that matter. When she told her parents that fateful night when she was fifteen it felt like the end of the world. Her father went quiet and her mother simply pressed her lips together tightly. Alice had reached out for her hand to squeeze it comfortingly, telling their parents they should be ashamed for not accepting Chaeyoung for who she really was, for not loving her unconditionally like a parent should. From then on, they became more understanding and accommodating. Chaeyoung knows Chanyeol's mother still deeply disapproves, but that is something she will no longer have to dwell on when she is ten thousand miles away.

Her flight is at ten am but her family have her at the airport by eight am, agreeing to stay with her until she has to part way at the gate. Even though Chaeyoung is a fully grown woman, this reassurance is vital. If she did not have her family admonishing her onto that plane, she fears she would never have the nerve to get on it on her own accord. It is strange, how something she once so looked forward to has become something of a nightmare for her.

Alice goes to find a coffeeshop, all of them need caffeine for this troublesome time. Chaeyoung sits in between her parents, eyes trained on her jeans so they cannot see the unshed tears in her eyes. She has been so strong up until this point, but the dam is steadily beginning to break and she fears the destruction that will ensue.

"Chaeyoung," her mother puts her arm around her shoulders. When Chaeyoung looks up, she sees the tears slipping down her cheeks. "We are so proud of you. We love you very much and you will always have a home with us."

Although Chaeyoung would like to reply, she is deemed speechless. Instead, she leans into her mother's side and allows herself to be held like a young girl again. When she was younger, her mom would hold her like this if she had a night terror, or if something trivial and meaningless had upset her at school. Chaeyoung longs to be this young again, to be so unaware and blissfully ignorant. she has grown up far too fast for her liking.

Alice comes back with a cardboard tray of coffee, smiling down sympathetically at her family. They sip their drinks in silence, each of them trying to think of something worthwhile to say but drawing a blank each time. All their goodbyes have been said already, now it is just a waiting game.

When the clock strikes 9:45, the park family move into action. Although the gate is not that far away, they need to allow for time to say their final goodbyes. Chaeyoung will hopefully be back for Christmas, which is only four months away. If all fails, perhaps she will return a lot sooner. though, that is something she is trying to eschew to the back of her mind.

"Good luck," her father kisses the top of her head. "You'll achieve great things, we believe in you."

"What he said," Alice gives her a watery smile, before pulling her into a bone-crushing hug. Chaeyoung wraps her arms around her sister's waist, wishing they could forever be this close. Perhaps it is Alice she will miss most of all. Her sister has been the only constant in her life. Even when Chaeyoung was away at university, her sister came to visit her most weekends. Not only are they siblings, but also soulmates. Chaeyoung will never find a connection like this in New York which is the most daunting thing to her. Without Alice, her life will feel so empty.

Over the tannoy system it announces the last chance to board the plane. Her mother grips her shoulders tightly, ineffectively trying to suppress her tears.

"Goodbye, my love," she kisses her forehead. "Call us the minute you get there and tell us everything. And for heaven's sake, stay safe!"

"Okay, Mom!" Chaeyoung calls over her shoulder as she begins to jog down the walkway into first class. Usually she would have travelled economy, but as a parting present her grandparents paid for her to upgrade her ticket. A generous, while wholly unnecessary gesture.

However, as it turns out, first class was perhaps the better option because Chaeyoung is led into a pod that gives her total isolation and privacy. When she slides up the divider, she leans back heavily into the chair and rubs her hands over her face. So far, the dam of tears has not yet burst but it is dangerously close in doing so. Now on the plane, mere minutes away from take-off, the reality hits her with such velocity it feels like being slogged in the gut. She is really doing this; really moving to New York with nothing but a headful of dreams and her guitar.

It is utter madness. completely foolish behaviour. What is she doing?

Yet, at the same time, Chaeyoung feels truly _alive_.

***

Nigh on two days, four hours sleep and endless pitstops later, Chaeyoung finally steps onto American soil and it feels as good as she remembered. Inhaling deeply, she feels her lungs with the sharp, cool air of New York and it floods her veins, filling her with adrenaline. Now she is here, she is determined to make this work- no matter how hard it might prove to be. She refuses to go back to Australia without making it work. Failure is not an option. Nor is giving up.

The process of going through immigration and the airport takes an eternity. Chaeyoung is itching to be released into New York which is where the real adventure begins. Already, she has made an itinerary of what she wants to do. She will organise her belongings and furniture before buckling down and looking for a job the next day. If she is fortunate, things will fall into place for her. If not, she refuses to go down without a fight.

Outside the airport there are a multitude of taxis lined up, beckoning for her. Nervously, she approaches one of them. Taking a deep breath, she climbs into the back of one. Chaeyoung is unsure of whether this is the proper etiquette but has seen people do this in movies so assumes it is.

"Where to, miss?" the driver asks.

"Cornelia Street," she says, simply saying it gives her a thrill. Cornelia Street. It sounds so perfect. She sits back in the taxi, letting the feeling wash over her. For months she has been anticipating this. Although she felt trepidation before she landed, now she is here, all the tension has been washed away by overwhelming excitement.

Craning her neck, Chaeyoung tries to take in as much scenery as she can. Rolling sky-scrapers, busy streets, and historic buildings.

The driver catches her in the rearview mirror and chuckles. "Your first time here?"

"No. I'm actually moving here," she leans forward. "I've come from Australia."

"Yeah, I could tell by the accent. Jesus, you've come a long away. What brought you here?"

Her true intentions sound so silly as they burn the tip of her tongue. Instead, she shrugs and falls back into the seat. "I just needed a change."

"We've all been there. At least you're young, you have chance to make a change before it's too late."

Although the man was only speaking casually in passing, his words have a profound effect on Chaeyoung. It is like a lightbulb has flickered on in her head. He's right. Chaeyoung is not doomed, she is not hopeless. She has the opportunity to make a change, to make things right; to turn this new life into something she really wants. Her grandfather always told her she could do whatever she dreamed of if she put her mind to it, and now she truly believes this. If Chaeyoung wants to live in New York and become a singer, she will. She _can_.

She must.

Cornelia Street is as perfect as in the photos. Chaeyoung practically has her nose pressed against the glass as her eyes widen. The street is bustling with life, but she expected that. The estate agent told her that it was a popular destination for locals and tourists, that it was situated in such a nice area that many people came to visit. Truthfully, she is very lucky to have been able to afford such a nice place. Chaeyoung knows how privileged her beginnings in New York are, even if they are humble.

"You're living in a real nice place, miss," the driver tells her, pulling up to the sidewalk. "Good luck and all the best."

"Thank you," Chaeyoung tells him, handing him the adequate amount of money plus a tip for his kindness and words of wisdom. Ducking out of the taxi she grabs her rucksack and begins making her way down the street. Thirteen Cornelia Street, that is her official address. Although she has to check the directions her estate agent emailed her, she manages to find it without much trouble. The block of apartments looks tidy and well-presented, opposite a delicatessen with a bright yellow storefront.

Chaeyoung is going to be just fine.

Parked outside the apartment is a moving van- her moving van. A pair of workmen haul her couch up the stairs as she watches in fascination. She wonders how much they have already furnished. She sent them with instructions, even drawing diagrams of the apartments layout and scanning them into an email for them. Chaeyoung reckons they were not too happy with her precision but she is paying them a hefty amount for it so they should listen to her orders.

Bounding up the stairs, she follows the men inside. Her apartment is on the third floor, which is why the men look so sweaty and scarlet with exertion. She nods shyly at them as she stands in the doorway. Already, they have moved in most of her possessions. Chaeyoung knew what the layout of the apartment looked like when it was bare on the housing website, but it looks completely different with her furniture. It looks like home already. She has an unexplainable warm sensation throbbing in her chest as she looks around. The living room is small, just about fitting her couch, flatscreen tv and wooden stand and coffee table. The floor is hardwood and the walls are yellow. The combination should not work, yet it does.

Through the door, it leads to a small carpeted hallway that breaks off to three doors. Behind the door directly opposite the living room is her bedroom. Her bed is already in here, though it looks slightly out of place in the room with vintage decorations and old-timely feel. The velveteen headboard encrusted with jewellery looks like an eyesore against the soft, duck-egg blue painted walls. Chaeyoung finds it amazing how each room's décor is wildly contrasting yet the whole place just seems to _work_.

The next room she enters is the bathroom, which is disappointingly normal. No unusual decorations; simply a shower, sink and counter and toilet. Perhaps Chaeyoung will hang a few photos on the wall to make it feel more homely. After all, she spends a lot of time in the bathroom; getting ready, putting on her makeup and showering. Or maybe if she's feeling particularly rebellious she will paint it some extraordinary bright colour. Who knows? New York is already starting to fill her with wild ideas.

The kitchen is the last room she investigates and by far the most magical. It is painted a deep blue, the kitchen counters and cupboards painted a slightly lighter shade. Above the cupboards, numerous green plants overhang attractively. A scrubbed wooden table is pressed against the wall with four washed chairs, an ornate candlestick acts a proud centrepiece. The whole room is so quirky yet so perfect it takes Chaeyoung's breath away.

She does a small twirl in the middle of the kitchen, her hair fanning around her as she laughs breathlessly. This is it. She's finally here, and it already feels like home. It is more than she could have ever asked for.

Once the removal men have gone, Chaeyoung begins to sort through the multitude of boxes and suitcases they have dumped in her already cramped living room. She sits down cross-legged on the hardwood floor, playing one of her records on her old record player she has placed on the small stand in the corner left by the previous owners. Probably because it is battered and looks like it has seen better days. But Chaeyoung has fallen in love with it. She has already put her framed photographs and record player on it. It feels fitting, somehow, to have a piece of someone else's history in her apartment.

Whilst unpacking, Chaeyoung truly appreciates how much smaller this apartment is compared to the one she rented in Melbourne. Her previous apartment had two bedrooms, the empty room is where she stored most of her possessions where they collected dust for months. Now she is faced with the task of cramming them all into this tiny apartment, she realises perhaps she needs to comb through them with a keener eye.

A job for tomorrow.

It is three pm in New York, meaning it will be seven am back in Melbourne. Her mother is usually awake by six am, so Chaeyoung takes it upon herself to call them. After all, they _did_ tell her to get in touch as soon as she landed.

Chaeyoung settles her laptop on the coffee table, tucking her hair behind her ears and trying to make herself look presentable which is futile after she has been travelling for practically forty eight hours. Several moments later, her mother's pixelated face appears on the screen. While Chaeyoung personally doesn't like Skype, her mother doesn't have the tools to Facetime. Fortunately, Alice does which will make their conversations much easier.

"Chaeyoung!" her mother exclaims. "Darling we've been worried sick! We're so glad you're okay."

"Of course I'm okay, Mom," she smiles. "It's just been a long couple of days. We had to make two stops and stop overnight. I've been trying to unpack all my stuff but I needed a break, I've brought _way_ too much."

"Well I did wonder when I saw how many suitcases you planned on taking," her mother chuckles. "So how is it? Tell me all about it!"

"It's amazing," Chaeyoung tells her honestly. "I love it. At first I was so scared but as soon as I landed here something clicked and... I know it sounds stupid but it feels like home already. My apartment is so cute too." She stands up and turns the webcam around, walking through the apartment and giving her mother a virtual tour. Even though her mother saw the photos, the apartment looks completely different when filled with Chaeyoung's furniture.

The tour stops in the kitchen where Chaeyoung rests the laptop on the side, smiling brightly awaiting her mother's verdict. Walking around again only made it that much more real. Chaeyoung hopes this feeling of child-like excitement and giddiness never wears off. She hopes she feels like this forever.

"It's beautiful," her mother concedes. "And quirky. Just like you. It's perfect."

Chaeyoung supposes it is.

***

The next day, Chaeyoung wakes up at noon, having accidentally slept eighteen hours. Her head thumps and her eyes feel bleary and sore but she will not be deterred. She has a busy schedule today. The first thing on her agenda is grocery shopping because her stomach is grumbling painfully and the kitchen cupboards are bare. Then, she will pick up some paint for the bathroom although she is undecided on what colour she wants to go for yet. After she has finished shopping, she will come home and resume unpacking. She is only a quarter of the way through and she does not want to spend the next few weeks drawing out the process.

Getting dressed, she quickly checks google maps to see where the nearest supermarket is. Her best place is somewhere called The Food Emporium which is a twenty minute walk away, so setting her GPS, she makes her way there. The long walk does not deter her. In fact, she enjoys taking in all the sights and landmarks- familiarising herself with the place. Even though this is her first time out of the apartment, she reckons she will be quite happy living in this area. Everything she needs is within walking distance and there is a selection of bars, restaurants, clubs and facilities available to her. However, to put these to good use she will have to make a group of friends which is the next challenge she faces, feasibly one of the most terrifying things to take into consideration about the move.

The supermarket is quieter than Chaeyoung anticipated, giving her a good chance to look around. She didn't write a list but knows vaguely what she needs. Cereal is at the top of her list. And oat milk. She's been craving a bowl of Cheerios all morning.

Just as she is rounding the corner with her shopping cart, she hears a strange sort of _splat_ noise accompanied by a groan and a string of curse words. Peering around, she sees a girl has dropped a bag of flour and it has made a tremendous mess all over the linoleum. She is almost hysterical, hissing something out of her teeth as she tries and fails to scoop it back into the bag.

"Do you want any help?" Chaeyoung asks.

"I don't know how much help you'll be able to give," the girl replies, running her hand through her short hair. It is cropped right underneath her ears, giving her a sort of boyish look that she pulls off immaculately because of her pretty face and well proportioned bone structure.

"I really don't want to get the manager because it's so embarrassing."

"It's okay, I'll say I dropped it. You can get the rest of your shopping."

The girl turns to Chaeyoung with wide eyes, looking on in admiration. "What? Are you serious?"

"Of course. Don't even worry about it."

"God, thank you so much," the girl breathes. "I'm not technically meant to leave the bakery but we ran out of flour and I had to run over-" she stops herself short, looking at Chaeyoung. "You should come visit. I'll give you something on the house for being so amazing."

"Thanks," Chaeyoung smiles. "That'd be greatly appreciated."

"We're called Angel Delight. If you type into your phone it should come up, it's not far from here. I really have to go now but thank you so much." The girl streaks past Chaeyoung, gently touching her arm before she goes. When she leaves, Chaeyoung searches the aisles to find someone to clean up the spillage. Despite the girl's judgement, the man is more than accommodating and pleasant about it; assuring her it's not a problem and not to worry about it.

Chaeyoung already feels a world away from Australia.

Once her groceries have been bought, she hails a taxi to take her home, too weighed down to face the walk again. Chaeyoung has already sorted out her subway card and bus pass, but perhaps in the future she may invest in a car. Though, that is taking it one step too far at the moment. One of Chaeyoung's biggest downfalls is that her head is stuffed full of dreams and fantasies and if she is not careful, she will become sorely disappointed when things don't work out exactly how she envisioned.

Chaeyoung needs to reel herself in. To take things one step at a time. The worst thing she can do right now is charge into everything headfirst and become too overwhelmed and ruin it for herself.

One step at a time. This is the mantra she chants to herself as she struggles to get her bulging grocery bags through her front door. One of them bursts in the kitchen which almost makes her lose it. Almost. At the last minute, she takes a deep breath to calm herself down and begins to unload her shopping into the fridge and cupboards. A small inconvenience like that isn't going to make her lose her temper. Not when things are going so well. She is meant to be leaving this attitude behind in Australia- to reinvent herself into a completely new character in New York. The Park Chaeyoung in Melbourne will not fit into Manhattan which is why she needs to make a change.

Once she has unloaded her groceries, Chaeyoung helps herself to a bowl of Cheerios, sitting cross-legged at the kitchen table and chewing thoughtfully. Tomorrow she will begin her job hunt, that will be in the afternoon. What she really wants to do is go busking. She has seen it in the movies and wants to experience it herself. After all, she has moved to New York to pursue a career in music and she will not get very far if she remains cooped up in her apartment all the time.

That afternoon is spent yet again arranging her apartment and tidying up. Chaeyoung is something of an impulsive cleaner, if her surroundings are not spotless it makes her irritable and unsettled. Although the previous tenants left the spot clean, it is not as meticulous as Chaeyoung would like. Halfway through scrubbing the bathroom tiles, she sits back on her haunches and curses; realising she has forgotten to pick any paint up. The distraction in the supermarket with the girl and the burst bag of flour scrambled her brain. With a sigh, she begins scrubbing again. She can always get it another day.

Chaeyoung just wants to feel organised- to feel like she has this under control. If it does not go perfectly according to plan then what is the point of being here? What is the point in searching for a new beginning? She does not want to prove her parents right; that moving to New York was a mistake. Chaeyoung can't bear facing her parents if this all goes wrong; their disappointment, their 'I told you so' silent judgement. The mere thought of it sends a shiver down Chaeyoung's spine.

What she continues to fail to remember is that it is only her first day in New York- that she has not yet given herself enough time to adjust or make a life. that will come with time.

The only thing is, Chaeyoung does not have the patience.

***

 _7:05 am_.

That is what time the alarm clock reads when it begins shrieking. Chaeyoung sits up and knuckles her heavy eyelids, trying to rouse herself. As soon as her eyes snap open she immediately regrets her decision to get up this early and start busking. Then, she reminds herself why she is here and a spring is soon put in her step.

Quickly showering and getting dressed, Chaeyoung wolfs down a bowl of Cheerios before making her way into her bedroom to retrieve her guitar from under her bed. Stroking the leather case lovingly, she unclips the hinges to double check it is still in there before slinging it over her shoulder.

Her theory is that if she gets to the subway station when all the morning commuters are milling around, there will be more opportunity for people to hear her voice and hopefully toss some money her way. For now money is not one of her concerns, she has a sizeable amount of savings from her grandmother's will but it will soon begin to haemorrhage if she cannot find a job.

The nearest subway station is a two minute walk away, which Chaeyoung guesses is her best bet. Already, even though it is still early, the streets are packed- mostly with people heading to work. There is an abundance of men in suits, smartly-dressed women looking frazzled and checking their watches, suitcases swinging importantly from their clenched fists. As chaeyoung walks at a leisurely pace, she cannot help feel like she is enjoying New York more than these people. To them, it is part of their daily slog. For her, it is a magical and unexplored universe with endless possibilities. The magic has worn off for them- they live in a city just like any other. Their dreams have been crushed a long time ago. Chaeyoung's are just beginning.

The station is nowhere near as grandiose as she hoped. It's small, cramped, dirty and smells faintly of urine. There are so many jostling bodies surrounding her it is difficult to break free from the crowd to find a corner to set up in. Eventually, she finds the perfect spot a few meters away from one of the platforms- ripe for pickings. Many people are lingering around waiting for the next train, meaning they will have no other choice but to listen to her.

Chaeyoung's fingers tremble as she gets the guitar out of the case and loops the strap around her neck. Usually she does not get stage fright, she has been singing and performing in front of crowds since she was eight years old; from the choir, guitar and piano recitals, to school productions, Chaeyoung has done it all. Which, after all, is why she wants to become a musician. But now? Something feels different. She never gets this nervous. Perhaps because it feels like everything is riding on this. That if these people don't pay attention now, they never will. That moving to New York will just have been a wasted opportunity.

Inhaling deeply, Chaeyoung begins to strum the chords to one of her favourite songs by The 1975. She has sung it more times than she can comprehend, knows the chords and melodies off by heart, could perform it flawlessly in her sleep; yet it feels like the first time.

" _Hey now call this a split 'cause you know that you will, oh you bite your friend like chocolate_."

As she begins singing, a few heads turn to look towards her. Some look away immediately, internally wondering what on earth she is doing; while a couple of people watch in fascination.

" _Now we run, run away from the boys in the blue, oh my car smells like chocolate_."

Chaeyoung almost jumps in surprise when someone bends down to toss a few pennies in her case. She smiles at them in disbelief before continuing, conscious she accidentally played the wrong note in the moment of shock. Truthfully, there was a small, cynical part of her that expected nobody to pay attention to her let alone give her money. Albeit it is only a small amount, but it still counts for something.

Once that song is over, Chaeyoung immediately launches into another. This time it is not a cover, but one of the songs she wrote herself. This one is old, having written it one night in her university dorm after breaking up with her girlfriend at the time. It turns out Bethany didn't like girls as she had previously assumed and was just using Chaeyoung as an in between until she figured out her true sexual orientation. Even singing it all these years later still causes Chaeyoung's heart to sting. 

"You have a beautiful voice," a voice comes suddenly. Chaeyoung flinches, having not been aware anyone had even paid attention to her. When she looks up, a small woman dressed in a pristine grey suit is smiling at her; quite literally taking Chaeyoung's breath away.

Her sleek, black hair is pinned back into a strict ponytail that would look severe on anybody else, but accentuates this woman's features beautifully. From her slightly slanted feline eyes, to her button nose and plump lips. When she smiles, she reveals a row of gummy teeth that looks sweetly child-like and earnest. The compliment she gives Chaeyoung is genuine, it is all in her expression.

"Thank you," Chaeyoung swallows.

"Did you write that song yourself?" the woman asks, cocking her head slightly. Time appears to be slowing down in the bustling train station, as Chaeyoung and this woman are the only things that matter in the world.

"I-I did," she replies. "A few years ago. It's one of my favourites."

"Mine too. It was beautiful."

"Gosh," Chaeyoung tucks her hair behind her ear in a manner that the woman finds completely enchanting. "Thank you very much. I was really nervous to play it but then I realised no one was actually listening..."

"Well, I certainly was." the woman swaps the briefcase in her right hand to her left, extending her hand out for Chaeyoung to shake. Chaeyoung has never known anyone to shake hands in real life, she has only ever done it when she was graduating from university and the dean handed her her diploma. She was unaware it was a gesture people still carried out in the twenty-first century. Yet, this woman is clearly a businesswoman so it is obviously the norm for her.

Chaeyoung feels a small crackle of electricity when their palms meet.

"What's your name?" the woman in the suit inquires.

"Park Chaeyoung," Chaeyoung replies. "Yourself?"

"Jennie Kim." Yes, a Kim. That makes sense to Chaeyoung, as the woman appears to be Korean too. "Listen, Chaeyoung, I have to rush off to work but will you be here again soon?"

"I can be if you want me to be."

"I do. Next time I'll come earlier so I can hear more songs. Take care." And like that, Jennie is swallowed up into the bustling crowd of commuters like Chaeyoung has conjured her in her head.

Perhaps it is the dreamy atmosphere of New York just getting to her. Or lack of sleep. Because there is no way the encounter with Jennie was real.

***

The skyscraper stands as imposing and intimidating as ever, the glass walls twinkling in the watery sunlight. Jennie has entered this building more times than she could ever count. Every time she steps foot into the lobby, the same feeling of dread washes over her.

She greets the receptionist as she does every morning before striding to the elevator which will take her up to the fifth floor- her floor. Looking down at her watch only fills her with more trepidation. She is ten minutes late on account of the fact she missed her train watching the beautiful girl playing her guitar and had to wait an extra five minutes for the next one. Although ten minutes is neither here nor there in terms of importance, tardiness is frowned upon in her department. When the elevator doors slide open she gulps in fear, knowing she is about to suffer one of her bosses harangues once she reaches her office.

"Miss Kim!" a voice bellows as Jennie blanches. She had hoped she'd be able to slip past his door without being detected. "In here."

Hanging her head in shame, Jennie slips into her bosses office and takes a seat on the opposite side of his desk- already knowing what she is about to be faced with. She dare not look up from her clasped hands on her lap. If she makes eye contact, it will only make it worse.

"Do you know what time it is, Miss Kim?"

"Ten minutes past nine, sir," her voice is quiet.

"And what time are you meant to be in the office, Miss Kim?"

"Nine o clock, sir. On the dot."

"So you're late."

This time, Jennie braves looking up. The older man is looking upon her with narrow, disapproving eyes. Having worked with him for so many years, Jennie knows this is simply his natural countenance. He disapproves of everything and everyone, but he's one of the best lawyers in New York. As much as Jennie fears him, she has the upmost of respect for him and hopes to one day achieve the prowess and reputation he has. Understandably, what he says goes in their department. As much as his interns and secretaries would like to disagree- he does indeed know best.

"I can't express how sorry I am, Mr Arnold. It will never happen again. My train was delayed. I am so, so sorry." 

"Jennie," he leans forward, his voice an octave softer. "I know you're sorry, but you have to follow the rules we have implemented. Just because your father owns the company does not mean you get special privileges, especially under my wing, or else everyone will be asking for them."

Jennie hangs her head again. "I understand, sir. I don't expect privileges. Or your understanding. I know what I did was wrong."

"Ensure you're here on time tomorrow or I will have to tell your father."

"Of course. Thank you, Mr Arnold, sir." Jennie stands and gives him a small bow before scurrying out of the office with her tail between her legs, her heart thumping in her ribcage. Being reprimanded is perhaps the worst feeling in the world to Jennie. Knowing someone's anger and disappointment is directed at Jennie, who strives for perfection in every aspect of her life, becomes overwhelming and upsetting. And Jennie is a sensitive soul at best.

As Jennie is making her way to her cubicle, she is waylaid by one of the girls she works with. Bae Joohyun. Ever since Jennie's first day, Joohyun took a liking to the younger girl and took her under her wing. Even though Joohyun is only a few years older than Jennie, those years of experience are of vital importance in the courtroom.

"He wasn't too hard on you, was he?" asks Joohyun sympathetically.

Jennie lifts one shoulder in a shrug. "I was expecting worse. I suppose I better get some work done or he'll be up my ass again." Joohyun gives her a small wave before heading to the photocopier. The older woman is one of the hardest workers Jennie knows, greatly admiring her inability to lose focus and stray away from whatever task she has at hand. Jennie hopes within a few years time she will be as impeccable as Joohyun.

It is a great relief to sit down in her cubicle and to take a moment for herself. She has been rushed off her feet all morning. Her impending lecture of being late spoiled the whole train ride to work so she could not think about the girl and her guitar. But now she can without being interrupted.

Jennie has never heard a voice quite like it. Her voice was as smooth as honey, her vocal tones sweet and unique; unlike anything Jennie hears on the radio or from the classical concerts her grandparents used to drag her to sometimes. And the girl herself- Chaeyoung- was perhaps the prettiest person Jennie has ever had the fortune to lay eyes on. From her dark hair, to her big, brown eyes and plump lips tinted with red. She is gorgeous and Jennie cannot help but feeling slightly in love with her.

Before long, a head is poked around Jennie's cubicle and she rolls her eyes when she sees her desk mate but also best friend, Im Nayeon.

"How was it with Mr Arnold?"

"Started on a strong six but declined to about a three."

Nayeon's eyes are wide, looking mildly impressed. "Wow. He went easy on you then, his wife must have put out last night or something." Jennie groans and tries to swat her but she ducks out of the way just in time. "How come you were late anyway? You're always on time."

"My train got delayed."

"Bullshit. Robbie came in on time and he takes the same one as you." 

Jennie sighs, wondering whether it is wise to divulge to Nayeon what really happened. as much as she loves her best friend, she can't deny she has the biggest mouth in the office. And if Mr Arnold were to catch downwind of the true nature of Jennie's tardiness she would be in _big_ trouble.

"You didn't have a one-night stand or something did you?"

"Ew, Nayeon!" protests Jennie. "No! Just get on with your work."

"But I can't! I need to know." Nayeon grabs onto Jennie's arm and squeezes it as if in the upmost of urgency. "You have to tell me or I'll die!" she feigns swooning in a theatrical way only Nayeon can get away with. With a defeated sigh, Jennie holds her hands up in defeat.

"Fine. I was stood listening to a girl sing on the subway. Happy?"

Nayeon wrinkles her nose. "Not really, no. Why did that make you late?"

"Because I spoke to her."

It is as if a lightbulb goes off in Nayeon's head in that moment. A grin spreads across her face, one Jennie knows all too well and immediately wishes she had kept her mouth shut. Now she will be subject to her friend's taunts all day.

"Was she a pretty girl?"

"Yes. Beautiful, actually."

"You're so hopeless, Jen."

"That's such bullshit! You're the one who can't even speak to the girl at the bakery."

After that, Nayeon is uncharacteristically quiet all morning.

***

Chaeyoung barely has time to sit down that afternoon. After busking in the subway for another hour, the crowds dwindle and she goes back home; her guitar case clinking with coins. Amazingly, she manages to scrape a few dollars in pennies. For her first day, she does not consider this at all. Considering she went with the expectation she would be ignored.

And she got to meet Jennie which was far more exciting than any amount of money from passers-by.

When she returns home, she piles her unwanted belongings into a bag and takes them to the nearest thrift store she can find. She has no use for them now and would like to think that somebody, somewhere, will make use for them- and be as excited about receiving them as she was once. Getting rid of her things feels like a huge weight off her chest- something Chaeyoung can't really explain. Maybe it is the feeling of slowly getting rid of the old pieces of herself to make room for the new person she hopes to blossom into.

Instead of going straight home, she diverts her journey and decides to pay a visit to Angel Delight. not only is her stomach rumbling but she could also use the company. Her brief conversation with Jennie this morning reminded her of how much she's been missing human interaction ever since she moved here.

The girl was right, Angel Delight is a ten minute walk from Chaeyoung's apartment which is convenient. If she likes it, she will have to frequent more visits here.

Somehow, it is exactly how Chaeyoung pictured it would be. It has a white storefront, the name of the bakery written in pale pink calligraphy with a hanging sign with a pink frosted cupcake motif. The front window is decorated beautifully with delicious looking baked goods, arranged attractively on tiered cake stands and doilies. An enticing smell wafts out onto the street, drawing Chaeyoung in like a sirens call. Pushing open the front door, a bell tinkles somewhere acknowledging her presence.

The inside of the bakery is just how she expected. Not only is there a counter and display cases, but it also appears to be a small café too with a dozen tables. Although there is nobody in here currently, Chaeyoung imagines it is busy because the display cases have just about been picked clean.

She walks over to the counter, waiting for someone to appear. While she waits, she gently taps her fingers against the dark wood. A clanging noise in one of the backrooms alerts her that someone is indeed here.

Suddenly, the door bursts open revealing a flustered looking girl, not the same one Chaeyoung saw in the supermarket. She has black hair cut into just on her shoulder, her bangs falling attractively into her pale face. Upon seeing Chaeyoung, her eyes widen slightly.

"I'm so sorry for the wait," she breathes, picking up a notebook and pencil. Her name tag reads 'Seungwan'. "What can I get you?"

"Actually I came here to see someone," Chaeyoung tells her. "I helped her in the supermarket the other day as silly as that sounds. She has short hair, to about here," she motions with her hands. "She was wearing round glasses-"

"Oh! You're Supergirl," Seungwan lets out a laugh. "Yeah, we know all about you. You really saved our asses the other day. We were packed out and Jeongyeon had to run and get some flour because we didn't have enough for the croissants. We all owe you one."

A flush creeps onto Chaeyoung's cheeks. "Don't be stupid. I just wanted to help."

"She's just in the back, I'll go get her." Seungwan slips into the back room and several moments later, she comes out with the girl from the supermarket in tow. Today, she is not wearing glasses. her name tag reads 'Jeongyeon'.

"Hey, it's you!" Jeongyeon grins from ear to ear. "I told the girls you'd be back but they all thought I was going nuts. It's so good to see you." She reaches over the counter to embrace Chaeyoung. "You've come just at the right time, we're just getting everything out of the oven."

"Good, I'm starving," Chaeyoung pats her cavernous stomach.

"Have a seat, I'll bring you something," Jeongyeon motions to one of the tables. "Seung, you can take your break now if you want." The other girl nods, reaching under the counter for her packed lunch and walking over to one of the tables with Chaeyoung.

"This is such a lovely place," Chaeyoung breathes, looking around. Beautiful paintings hang proudly on the pale pink walls. "Do you enjoy working here?"

"I love it," Seungwan nods, biting into an apple. "It isn't exactly what I pictured myself doing after college but I'm glad I ended up here."

"I'm new here," explains Chaeyoung. "I only moved at the weekend, I guess I'm just trying to get a feel of the place. I'm really glad I ran into Jeongyeon. She's the first person I've spoken to since I arrived." She refrains from mentioning Jennie because this girl will not care.

Seungwan cocks her head. "Really? Wow, that's so exciting! Let me guess, you moved from Australia?" Chaeyoung nods. "Your accent is really pretty. How are you finding it so far?"

"I love it," Chaeyoung says truthfully. "It's everything I could have ever hoped for. Now all I need is a job and it'll feel complete."

Before Seungwan can reply, Jeongyeon is coming over with a plate of baked goods for Chaeyoung to sample. Evidently they are straight from the oven because steam is still pouring out of the pastry. Chaeyoung's mouth waters as she looks at the soft cookie, red velvet cupcake and slice of pecan pie. Jeongyeon serves it to her with flourish, even going as far as to lay a napkin on Chaeyoung's lap before taking a seat next to Seungwan, watching Chaeyoung take the first bite out of the cupcake.

"Oh my god," Chaeyoung groans, covering her mouth. "This is too good it's dangerous." She takes another bite, ignoring the burning sensation on her tongue. She wants to stuff the whole thing in her mouth it's so good.

"I think that's the best compliment we've ever gotten," Seungwan exchanges a glance with Jeongyeon and they break into a smile.

"We could use a taste tester," Jeongyeon jokes.

"Actually, she- wait, I'm sorry. I never got your name," Seungwan says.

"Roseanne Park," Chaeyoung swallows her last mouthful of cupcake, eyeing up the pecan pie.

"Roseanne was just saying she's new here, just moved on Saturday. She hasn't got a job yet," Seungwan flickers her eyebrows up in a manner that Chaeyoung does not understand but apparently Jeongyeon catches onto exactly what she's saying.

"Really? One of our girls walked out the other weekend, she's moving away with her boyfriend or some bullshit. We could always use another set of hands, Roseanne. if you're for a job here, that is."

Chaeyoung's mouth drops open. "Are you serious? Oh my god this can't be happening. Yes! Yes, I'd love to work here! Wow, thank you so much."

"It's always nice to see an enthusiastic member of the team," Jeongyeon smiles. "It looks like fate brought you here, Roseanne."

"Rosie, please," her smile is contagious. "Call me Rosie. Or Chaeyoung, I don't mind." She cannot afford to be picky now granted with this fantastic opportunity.

She breaks off a piece of cookie to share with Seungwan who has been eyeing it up discreetly. Jeongyeon begins chatting to Chaeyoung about timetables, rotas and work jargon that makes her head spin. Eventually, Seungwan rests a hand on Jeongyeon's arm and tells her to slow it down before Chaeyoung gets overwhelmed which she appreciates because otherwise she wouldn't have been brave enough to say it.

"Why don't you come in on Thursday morning and we can show you the ropes?" Jeongyeon suggests. Thursday is the day after tomorrow, which suits Chaeyoung perfectly.

"Of course. I can't wait."

Chaeyoung stays in the bakery for an hour, talking with the girls. It is not until a customer comes in does she take her leave, practically skipping down the street in glee. She can't believe she has been offered a job so easily when only a few months prior she was having such strife trying to find one online. It looks like things are finally starting to look up for Chaeyoung.

That along with meeting Jennie this morning, it certainly seems like fate is on her side.

***

The next day, true to her word, Jennie is there. Chaeyoung is two songs in when a familiar head bobs through the crowd. Chaeyoung stops strumming mid-song, her smile lighting up the whole subway station when she sees Jennie approaching her.

"Hey!" She exclaims. "You made it!"

"I promised I'd come, didn't I?" Jennie smiles. Today, she wears a maroon two piece with a pencil skirt and blazer. Although it is not stereotypically business-like, she carries it off so beautifully that no one gives it a second thought. "So, what have you got in store for today?"

"That's all part of the surprise," Chaeyoung taps her nose mysteriously which makes a giggle bubble in Jennie's throat. She takes a step back, giving Chaeyoung space as she begins to play the first few chords of one of her favourite songs; one of the first she learned to play on her guitar, from a band she has countless vinyl records of. It reminds her that she is yet to unpack them and find space for them in her tiny apartment.

Jennie does not recognise the song, yet she is enraptured when Chaeyoung begins to sing. Even though she doesn't know the lyrics, Chaeyoung somehow makes her feel like she does. The tune brings back a misty nostalgia for a memory that Jennie has never experienced before. It is almost magical how she manages to elicit this unfamiliar feeling.

" _Little by little, gave you everything you ever dreamed of_ ," Chaeyoung sings. " _Little by little, the wheels of your life are slowly falling off. Little by little, you have to give all in your life and all the time I just ask myself why you're really here_?"

Rhe breath is stuck painfully in Jennie's throat as she cannot look away from Chaeyoung. Her expressions while she sings are so sweet and pure, it looks like there is nothing she loves more than performing to this audience of dissociative businessmen and students.

When she finishes, Jennie claps so hard her palms begin to sting. Flushing, Chaeyoung gives a jokey courtesy.

"That was amazing," Jennie breathes, awestruck. "You're too talented to be stuck in this subway station."

"Well, hopefully I won't be here forever," Chaeyoung says, feeling safe enough to divulge her plans with Jennie. "The whole reason I moved here was to become a singer."

Jennie's interest is piqued.

"You're Australian, right?"

"Right. And you're... from New Zealand?" Chaeyoung hazards a guess and Jennie claps when she gets the right answer.

"Yep. All the way from Auckland. Guess that makes us practically relatives," she smiles.

"Not quite. I think Australia is a little more exciting than New Zealand," Chaeyoung chuckles and Jennie holds her hand to her chest in mock outrage.

"You take that back!"

"Sorry, sorry," Chaeyoung holds her hands up in defeat. "I realise it was rather harsh. You seem to be the most interesting New Zealander I've ever met. Not that I've met a lot."

"I'm trying to figure out if that's a compliment," Jennie raises a perfectly arched eyebrow, causing Chaeyoung to giggle.

She performs one more song before Jennie has to dash off to work, promising she will be back tomorrow for more. Even earlier, if she can manage it, that is if she manages to wake up on her first alarm. Chaeyoung waves her off, unable to repress her smile.

***

On Wednesday night, Chaeyoung does not sleep. Her mind is reeling with thoughts of Jennie's pretty smile and the prospect of starting work tomorrow. Truthfully, although she would not admit it, Chaeyoung is nervous. She so desperately needs this job to work out because she is going to struggle finding an offer so perfect. There is also the overhanging threat of disappointing Jeongyeon after she was so kind as to offer her a job.

Chaeyoung tosses and turns, the hours slipping away from her. She agreed to go in at nine am, meaning her alarm is set for eight. She wonders if Jennie will be waiting for her on the subway tomorrow. Part of her wants to try and get to the subway station early morning on the off chance she will see the girl. Then she has to reel herself in. It's just not realistic. She needs to be early on her first day to make a shining impression. Chaeyoung will not throw this opportunity away.

Waking up feels different than it has done the past few mornings. Probably because Chaeyoung finally feels like she has a purpose- has a reason to get out of bed. Even though the majority of the population of New York despise work, Chaeyoung is excited. Apprehensive, too. But she is doing her best to eschew these thoughts.

There is a definite tremor in her hands as she tries to apply her makeup. Twice she accidentally stabs herself in the eye with the mascara brush and she does not even attempt applying eyeliner, knowing it will only end in disaster. Her stomach is too turbulent to risk eating any breakfast, so she suffices with a cup of coffee. Her teeth chatter against the porcelain mug. The caffeine only seems to amplify her nerves.

Simultaneously, her fear is both rational and irrational. Rational in the sense she is about to step into uncharted territory and the fear of the unknown is just an intrinsic human reaction; irrational in the way she knows the girls in the bakery and would go as far to say she likes them. They are lovely, even. Chaeyoung can't comprehend how she has landed on her feet so quickly. It all seems so surreal, like any moment she will open her eyes and wake up back in Melbourne- New York having been one lucid and fanciful dream.

But right now, she is here. And she has a job to do. She can't let Jeongyeon down.

The morning air is crisp and fresh, with a slight chill in the breeze. It is the beginning of September after all. Soon it will be winter and Chaeyoung has read enough romance novels and seen enough television to know that winters in New York are brutal. Completely different to the swelteringly hot, sticky and uncomfortable ones back in Melbourne. Chaeyoung welcomes the change with open arms- _craves_ it. She has never seen snow in real life and deep down, there is a childish desire to experience it with her own eyes. To feel the cold flakes falling against her flushed cheeks, feel the wetness seep through her gloves as she builds a snowman, have Jennie's pretty red lips pressed against her in the swirling snowstorm-

Chaeyoung gives her head a firm shake, feeling her body heat up at the mere implication. Not only has Jennie completely stolen Chaeyoung's heart, but also her thoughts too. Whenever she has a spare moment, Chaeyoung finds her mind wandering. There are a multitude of questions that barrage her. Who is Jennie? Will she ever see her again? Where does she work? Where does she live, is it close by? Does Jennie's heart flutter every time she thinks about Chaeyoung like hers does when she thinks about Jennie?

She is so lost in thought she almost bumps into a man on the street. They knock shoulders so violently Chaeyoung almost loses her balance. She turns around to apologise to him profusely but he simply rolls his eyes at her and continues walking. Chaeyoung bites her lip in guilt, this is _not_ a good start to the day that was meant to be perfect.

However, once she arrives at the bakery things begin to look up considerably. It is not all doom a and gloom like she had assumed. Because Jeongyeon is the owner and manager of the bakery, she leaves it to the other girls to show Chaeyoung the ropes. Today, there are two new faces behind the counter. One Kim Dahyun, who does most of the training, and Park Sooyoung, a beautiful girl with long, raven-black hair that Chaeyoung cannot keep her eyes off. Multiple times, Dahyun has to give her a little nudge with her elbow to ensure she is listening, smirking when she sees the cause of the disturbance.

"It's not what it looks like," Chaeyoung tells Dahyun, blushing to the roots of her hair.

"Sure," the girl rolls her eyes affectionately. "You aren't the first to look at her and you won't be the last."

In honesty, Chaeyoung is so overwhelmed having to work with so many pretty girls. Dahyun is gorgeous too, in her own adorable and unassuming way. She looks like a girl-next-door, the type chaeyoung would like to take home to her parents and invite her over on Christmas eve for cocoa and cookies. She already is acquainted with Seungwan and Jeongyeon, but that doesn't mean she still isn't flustered around them. At one point, her and Jeongyeon brush hands reaching into the cash register and Chaeyoung blushes so hard she thinks her head is going to explode.

But that is not the most mortifying thing that happens on her shift.

It's just a little after the lunchtime rush, where hordes of workmen, businesswomen, artists and overall free spirits flocked to the bakery to pick up something to eat. Chaeyoung and Dahyun are wiping down the tables while Chaeyoung longingly thinks of her lunch of pork stirfry that's waiting for her in the staff fridge.

However, her stomach drops and her appetite dissipates when she spots who is walking into the bakery.

With a squeak, she dives under one of the tables, dragging Dahyun down by her wrist. The girl yelps in surprise and Chaeyoung hushes her violently, eyes wide in mortification.

"What's wrong?" whispers Dahyun, looking greatly concerned.

"I-I'm avoiding someone," Chaeyoung swallows.

"Who? _Jennie_?"

She almost faints.

"How do you know her?" 

"She comes in here all the time. Her and her friends get lunch here and sometimes come see us after work."

Chaeyoung's eyes flicker up to the sky and she squeezes them shut in a silent prayer. _God_ , _if at any time you would like to strike me down and send me up to the pearly gates, please make it quick so I don't have to live through this embarrassment._

"Jennie!" Jeongyeon calls, sounding pleased. "It's so good to see you again!"

"You too, Jeong," Jennie's lovely accent can be heard. It makes Chaeyoung's stomach go tight and warmth flood her senses. "Nayeon sends her regards but she was too busy with paperwork to see you today."

"Oh, t-that's no problem," Jeongyeon sounds bumbling. "T-tell her I hope I'll see her soon." Looking over, Chaeyoung sees Dahyun is wearing a knowing smirk.

Deciding she can't stay crouched under this table forever, Chaeyoung begins to crawl back behind the counter, following Dahyun closely. She knows she will have to explain her erratic behaviour sooner or later. For now, she is too focused on making sure she slips a way from Jennie undetected. It is not that she doesn't want to see Jennie, quite the opposite, but she doesn't want the girl to think she's stalking her because fate seems to be having a humorous time bringing them together as of late.

Jennie and Jeongyeon are mid conversation when they halt, both of them looking down at Chaeyoung and Dahyun on the floor in confusion. Chaeyoung's blood runs cold when she catches Jennie's confused gaze. She gulps, preparing herself for the worst.

"What on earth are you two doing down there?" Jeongyeon looks utterly perplexed.

"Chaeyoung!" Jennie exclaims, a wide smile splitting her face. "Since when do you work here?"

"As of today," she replies faintly, blowing a strand of hair out of her sweaty face. "I'm not stalking you, I promise. I didn't even know you come here!"

"What? Don't be stupid! I'm glad I finally found you again! I was worried you'd moved onto another subway when I didn't see you this morning."

Chaeyoung's knees almost buckle under the pressure knowing Jennie purposely sought her out this morning in hopes of seeing her again.

"I was here."

"Well, now I know where to find you next time," teases Jennie. "I'm kidding, totally kidding. I'm not stalking _you_ or anything either!"

Both of them look away, blushing.

Fortunately, Dahyun has the common sense to step in and ask Jennie what she would like for lunch. Jennie informs her she's getting both her and Nayeon's, which is why she's buying twice as much as normal. While Dahyun is putting her things in a paper bag, Jennie turns to Chaeyoung.

"What time do you get your lunch break tomorrow?"

Jeongyeon intervenes. "Whenever you want her to, Jen."

Jennie giggles. "Why thank you. I tell you what, do you want to grab some lunch tomorrow? My treat. I get off at twelve thirty but I can be here for twelve forty five for you."

"I'd love to," Chaeyoung nods. "Thank you so much, Jennie."

Once Dahyun gives Jennie her order and she pays for it, she bids the girls a small goodbye before ducking out of the bakery, hurrying down the sidewalk in her high heels. When she is out of the door, simultaneously, all the girls slowly turn to stare at Chaeyoung.

"What was that?" inquires Sooyoung, wide-eyed.

"I-I honestly have no idea," Chaeyoung's voice is so quiet they can barely register what she's saying.

"Since when have you known Jennie Kim?"

"The other day she saw me busking on the subway and we got talking. I honestly had no idea she knows you guys."

"Well you're in luck," Jeongyeon smirks. "We happen to know her very well. Seungwan dates one of her best friends, don't you?

"Jeong, shut up embarrassing me." 

"Let's not forget you and Nayeon," Dahyun giggles. "You two have been in love ever since the fateful moment she asked you for that strawberry cupcake."

"Right!" Jeongyeon barks, her playful demeanour suddenly having vanished. "Get back to work all of you. I won't have my girls disrespecting me like this!"

With a giggle, the girls hurry back into the kitchen to get to work.

***

Time is a strange thing. When you want it to go fast, it plods along at a sluggish pace. When you went it to go slowly, it slips past you in the blink of an eye. Chaeyoung cannot decide how she wants time to flow that day. Part of her is dreading her lunch date with Jennie, while the other half is so excited she can barely contain herself. So time compromises. The night before, it drags on agonisingly slow. And the next morning, Chaeyoung blinks and hours have gone by. The girls at work tease her mercilessly about how often she will nervously check the clock, shifting on her feet in an antsy manner.

It has been a while since chaeyoung has been on a date- _is_ it a date? Or is Jennie simply taking her out because she sees a potential friendship blossoming from this- so she is rusty. What will she even talk to Jennie about? She knows nothing about the girl apart from her name, and even then she had to find out her full name from Jeongyeon. It's completely idiotic, made even worse that Chaeyoung is starting to fall for her when she doesn't know anything about her.

Dahyun gives her some conversation starters while Jeongyeon tells her some questions that she should ask Jennie that will undoubtedly get her to launch into a long-winded conversation. Apparently she is good at that. While she may seem shy on the surface, Jennie will talk for hours about a topic she knows a lot about or likes to talk about. Chaeyoung, obviously, didn't know this so is thankful for the heads up.

Jennie arrives at twelve forty-five on the dot. Even though she has been at work all morning, she looks flawless. Today she wears a floaty white blouse, black cigarette trousers and expensive looking pumps on her feet. Her black hair hangs straight down her back like an inky waterfall. It is obvious she has made an effort with her makeup. She has gone as far to apply eyeliner, lipgloss, blusher and highlight even though the times Chaeyoung has seen her previously she has only donned concealer and mascara. The knowledge of knowing Jennie has tried as hard as chaeyoung puts her at ease. She offers Jennie a shy but genuine smile when she approaches the counter.

"Hey. You look beautiful."

Jennie flushes slightly under her blusher. "Thank you very much. Can I say you look darling?" She reaches forward to tug Chaeyoung's frilly apron playfully, giggling slightly. The younger girl rolls her eyes, attempting to look annoyed but can't help smiling herself. She darts into the back room to hang the apron up, quickly being cornered into a group hug by her colleagues and then Seungwan pushes her out by the small of her back. Jennie is looking around the bakery while she waits. Chaeyoung thinks she looks even more beautiful when she is caught off guard.

"Ready to go," Chaeyoung hitches her purse across her shoulder.

"Aw," Jennie pouts. "I was hoping you would come in the apron."

"I think the novelty would soon wear off."

They walk out of the bakery and once outside, this is when the reality hits Chaeyoung. Her and Jennie are actually going to get lunch together. They're going to be spending an extended amount of time together, just the two of them. This means that Jennie will no longer be a mystery to her. And while Chaeyoung does indeed want to get to know Jennie more, some of the magic will wear off.

When Jennie looks up at Chaeyoung and offers her a timid smile, Chaeyoung realises that the magic is, indeed, there and will remain.

"There's this Italian place called Lucia's I want to show you," Jennie tells her. "Me and Nayeon sometimes go there for lunch when we have time. They do the best pasta ever. It's just a few blocks away."

"So... is Nayeon, like, your best friend?" inquires Chaeyoung. She is trying her hardest to spark up conversation. 

"I guess she's of them, definitely. I have two other best friends who I've known since I was a teenager. Well, I've known Jisoo since we were practically in the womb," she jokes. "Our moms were friends when they were _our_ age. And Lisa... I don't even remember how I became friends with Lisa. One day she was just there."

"Wow. It must be nice to still be good friends after all those years."

"What about you?" Jennie cocks her head.

"Oh," Chaeyoung blushes. "I-I don't really have many friends. I guess the only people I could consider to be my friends are the girls I work with. Pathetic, I know. Even back in Australia I always considered my sister my best friend."

"That's not pathetic at all. In fact, it's really nice. I would love to have a sister and to especially consider her my best friend."

Before Chaeyoung can delve further, Jennie has come to a halt outside the restaurant. Chaeyoung can't explain it, but it looks totally Jennie. It has a red storefront, with a few tables sat outside, the canopy is littered with fairy lights and beautiful potted plants set a romantic and luxurious atmosphere. Delicious smells waft out onto the street, causing Chaeyoung's stomach to growl. Because she was too nervous to eat breakfast, she is consequently now starving.

"Jennie this looks really expensive," she falters, guilt already seeping in.

"It's not, honestly!" Jennie protests. "It's totally fine. _Please_ , Chaeyoung. They have the best pasta ever." She pouts, widening her eyes for effect and Chaeyoung feels her stomach doing somersaults. Goddamnit. why is she so easily swayed? She's always been a sucker for a pretty girl, especially sweet ones like Jennie. Although her conscience protests it, Chaeyoung follows Jennie inside.

The main thing is is that it's cheered Jennie up.

"Miss Kim!" The waitress beams upon seeing them there. "It's been ages! Do you want your usual table?"

"Yes please."

Chaeyoung hangs a few steps behind Jennie, taking in the decor. It's very elegant, very expensive looking and very romantic. Looking around, she notices that most of the occupied tables are taken by couples; all of them lost in their own romantic bubbles. Whether Jennie brought her here intentionally, she does not know. But the implications of being in such an environment makes her heart skip a few beats. Surely Jennie is not expecting her to behave like that with her? They're not even on a date. They don't even know each other-

In a panic, she looks up and finds her eyes locking with Jennie's. The older girl gives her a reassuring smile, like she can almost sense her tension.

After that, Chaeyoung calms down considerably.

Both of them order diet cokes, with lime not lemon, causing them to crack up. The waitress even has a small, knowing smile- like she can see something the girls cannot. Then they are given their menus which Chaeyoung studies intently. She takes food very seriously, particularly Italian which is one of her favourites.

"What do you usually get?" she asks Jennie, who has already closed her menu and is waiting patiently for the other girl to decide.

"The carbonara. Call me boring, I know. I always order it here."

Chaeyoung purses her lips in thought. She is now looking at the pizza section, weighing up her options.

"Hm. I think I'm going to have the fettuccine," she says, slowly closing her menu as if she is unsure of her decision and might change her mind last minute.

"A solid choice. That's one of Nayeon's favourites. Every time we come she tries something different but I'm not that brave."

"Why push yourself out of the comfort zone?" teases chaeyoung which makes Jennie nod in agreement.

The waitress comes to take their order and Jennie orders a side of garlic bread and french fries for them to share, which Chaeyoung is grateful for. She didn't want to look greedy by suggesting it. Jennie is so dainty and delicate it looks like she should not eat much, but thankfully, by the sounds of it, she does.

"I'm going to stink up the whole office with garlic breath," the older girl sighs. "Ah well, if that's the price I have to pay then so be it."

"What do you do in the office?" Chaeyoung asks, her interest piqued. Jeongyeon told her this was the topic she should try and steer Jennie towards most.

"I'm a lawyer," she says. Of course. It shouldn't surprise Chaeyoung in the slightest. Ever since she first laid eyes on Jennie she knew she had a sophisticated and refined air about her- which, given her career, makes sense. "When I was in college I was lucky enough to get an internship at the office so when I finished my degree I've worked there ever since. I got it because of my dad's connections there. He told me that even though I'm his daughter I shouldn't take an internship for granted because I might not get a place." She pauses to take a sip of coke.

"Wow. That sounds... challenging," is the only word Chaeyoung can think of.

"I guess. I worked hard so it all came out right in the end which is the main thing. My dad came to New York from Seoul on an internship when he was eighteen and built himself up. That's why he values hard work so much. He's never handed me anything on a plate."

"That's a good life lesson," the younger girl nods. "What's the point in just giving you it without putting in any of the work? It wouldn't be fair on the other people there."

"Exactly. So what about you? Wait, can I guess? Are you some kind of artist?"

"I'm actually a biochemistry engineer," Chaeyoung puts on her best haughty voice. Immediately, Jennie begins floundering, formulating an apology. Then, Chaeyoung giggles. "I'm totally kidding. Yeah, I'm an artist. Kind of. I studied Art History and Liberal Arts in college. Against my parent's wishes of course."

"What do you mean?"

"I think they would have loved for me to follow the same path as you. They said studying art wasn't 'sustainable' and I wouldn't get a career," Chaeyoung rolls her eyes. "I had a design job in Melbourne, but I guess they were kinda right to some extent."

"Is that why you came to New York?"

"No. I.. it's really embarrassing but... I want to be a musician." She cautions a glance up at Jennie to see some sign of disapproval. A suppressed smirk, a quirked eyebrow, or a small snicker. Nothing. The older girl is focusing on her intently, urging her to continue. "It's always been a stupid dream of mine. Every day I'm here I realise it's more unrealistic but... I'm glad I came here anyway."

"It's not stupid, Chaeyoung," Jennie protests. "It's really brave. To love something so much you'd turn your life upside down to chase your dream? That's really commendable. And, for what it's worth, I'm glad you came here too."

Chaeyoung has a difficult time swallowing. By now, her chest has constricted so tightly she worries she may never get air into her lungs again. Jennie's words were so innocuous, not in the slightest bit flirtatious or suggestive. They sounded genuine. Like she was honestly happy to be here with her.

"I'm glad I am too," Chaeyoung whispers.

Their conversation is cut short by their food being brought to them. Chaeyoung is relieved about the quick service, not only because she is starving but also so they can steer away from that point in the conversation and Jennie could forget about Chaeyoung's awkwardness.

"Oh my god," she groans, holding her hand over her mouth. "This is so good. You weren't lying."

"Would I ever?" Jennie asks. "See! I knew you'd love it."

"Can I be your new lunch date instead of Nayeon?"

As soon as the words leave her mouth, Chaeyoung freezes, realising too late. She expects Jennie to wrinkle her nose up in disgust or make some lame excuse because all Chaeyoung has done over lunch is make herself look like an idiot so Jennie probably hates her, deep down. However, much to her surprise, the older girl just smiles.

"Of course. I'd love that."

So that has settled it.

***

Jennie walks her back to the bakery. By now, the conversation flows so easily between them that Chaeyoung feels like she has been out to lunch with an old friend and not a stranger. At first glance, it seemed like her and Jennie would have nothing in common, which was her main fear. As it turns out, she had nothing to worry about. Chaeyoung may be delusional, and feeling slightly giddy, but she feels like her and Jennie have just clicked. It's an unexplainable feeling, yet it feels so natural that Chaeyoung doesn't question it. Jennie is the same.

"I had a lot of fun, Chaeyoung," Jennie tells her outside the bakery. In another universe, they would be walking home from a date and they would be kissing outside of Chaeyoung's door, not in the middle of a bustling street in Manhattan. "If you meant your offer of having lunch more often, I'd really appreciate it."

"Of course I did," she nods. She sucks her breath in slightly before she speaks again, unsure of overstepping the boundary and then thinks _what the hell_? "Do you... like, want my number so we can arrange something?"

The effect on Jennie is immediate. "I'd love that."

Chaeyoung fumbles for her phone in her purse, unlocking it with shaking thumbs. She reads out the digits for Jennie to note down on her much newer and more expensive looking phone. When they're finished, Jennie politely and quickly excuses herself because if she lingers much longer she'll miss her train but her final words to Chaeyoung are that she's looking forward to seeing her again.

As Chaeyoung walks into the bakery, she is a complete daze. Her head is in the clouds, rocketing off into orbit on a planet solely inhabited by her and Jennie. She can't believe this is happening. This kind of thing just doesn't happen to Chaeyoung. Pretty girls like Jennie don't take interest in mousy girls like her. Chaeyoung has always been the underdog, always constantly looked over by her peers. It's strange and exciting and new.

"Someone looks like they had fun," teases Seungwan.

"I did," Chaeyoung says, unabashed. Her expression has already revealed too much so what's the point in lying? "I didn't think it was going to go so well but it did."

"See? What did we tell you."

She floats into the back room to put her apron back on. Though, she can't concentrate for the rest of the day. Her mind is too consumed by Jennie Kim.

***

When Jennie arrives back the office, Nayeon and Joohyun are conveniently sat at Nayeon's booth, apparently deep in conversation. Though, when Jennie approaches, their talking stops abruptly as they look up at Jennie with smirks. Jennie does her upmost best to ignore them, dumping her bag and coat down on her desk and flopping into her chair. She's glad she opted not to wear heels today.

"So," Nayeon draws out the 'o', turning to her. "How was it?"

Jennie shrugs, "it was good."

"Good as in 'great' or good as in 'it was awful and I never want to see her again'?" inquires Joohyun.

"The first one," she clarifies.

Nayeon pauses, sniffing slightly and then looking stricken. "What the hell? You took her to Luucia's!"

"So?"

" _So_?" she repeats, smacking her friend's arm. "That's our place!"

"Hey!" Jennie ducks away, rubbing the wound. "You're always too busy to come! You just want to go to the bakery to spy on Jeongyeon."

Joohyun gasps and begins laughing while Nayeon slowly turns a puce colour in indignation.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," she snaps, grabbing a stack of paper and storming away with it. Though Nayeon is freely allowed to tease Jennie, she does not appreciate the motion being reciprocated. Especially when it involves Jeongyeon, which is rather a sensitive topic.

"So are you seeing her again?" Joohyun tilts her head. Although she is only older than them by a few years, her maturity is welcomed and adored by Jennie. Being an only child, she often feels like Joohyun is the closest thing she will ever get to a sister. She feels like she can tell her absolutely anything because she never passes judgement nor does she ever make fun of her. While Jennie loves Nayeon to pieces, the girl can sometimes be a bit too immature.

"I hope so. She gave me her number so we'll just have to see."

Jennie does not want to get her hopes up, because after one- can she warrant calling it a date?- you should never expect anything more or get too ahead of yourself in case it all comes crashing down, but Jennie finds herself doing this anyway. She likes Chaeyoung, a lot. When she saw her busking the other morning in the subway she had no idea what the girl was like under the surface, and now she has seen her, Jennie cannot help but craving more.

She tries to be cool about it, telling herself to not anything to come out of it. Yet that does not stop her eyes drifting to her phone every few minutes.

***

Exhausted after a long day at work, Chaeyoung finally flops into bed at ten pm that night. Because she was still full from lunch, she had only made herself a meagre dinner of salad and chicken. She was far too tired to be cooking anything more extravagant.

All day she had been putting off looking at her phone. The knowledge that Jennie's number is now in her contacts list looms over her threateningly. Because Chaeyoung is unexperienced with this, she doesn't know the proper etiquette as to when is the best time to get in touch with Jennie. Should she text her tonight? Or should she leave it until tomorrow in an attempt to not look too keen? Though, there's no point denying that Chaeyoung is keen. She happily could have spent all day with Jennie.

Obviously Jennie is going to let Chaeyoung text her first which is a huge pressure on her shoulders. Once Chaeyoung decides she wants to text Jennie before the night is over, she is then faced with the dilemma as to what to say to her. She could send her a goodnight text, though that would look strange considering they have not been messaging throughout the day. She is far too tired to start a conversation now, so what should she do?

In the end, Chaeyoung becomes so frustrated with her dithering that she takes matters into her own hands, ignoring the niggling voices in the back of her mind.

**Chaeyoung (10:37pm): hi jennie, it's chaeyoung! i had a lot of fun today, thank you for inviting me**

**Jennie (10:37pm): no problem! i'm glad you agreed to join me :)**

Chaeyoung rolls onto her stomach, warmth spreading throughout her body. She doesn't care if she's acting like a silly schoolgirl, that is just the feeling Jennie gives her.

**Chaeyoung (10:37pm): if you're free on saturday we could get lunch again? my treat this time :)**

**Jennie (10:38pm): it's a date :)**


	2. two

On the whole, Jennie does not work Saturdays. This is one of the perks of a nine to five office job, unless she is called in by Mr Arnold for some emergency which is a very rare occasion. She is too far down the hierarchy for this to really apply to her. Usually it is Joohyun who is called first to help him. Jennie doesn't mind this at all. Even though she feels much older than twenty-two, she is still a young woman after all, with a life outside of the office. So free weekends are very appreciated. Most weekends she lounges in her apartment, not changing out of her pyjamas and eating pints of ice cream whilst watching Netflix. Sometimes her friends manage to drag her out, though most of the time she turns these offers down because she is too tired from a week full of working. By now, Jisoo and Lisa are used to her excuses and absences. They joke that she is as allusive as the Loch Ness monster. These days, there is some truth in it.

However, this Saturday, Jennie has a date. An actual date, she reminds herself. At first she was nervous to send Chaeyoung such a bold message, wondering if she had overstepped an unspoken boundary. While she was only remarking it in a slightly teasing manner, there was hope bubbling inside her. And when Chaeyoung agreed, that only made it more of a reality.

Jennie is unable to sleep in past eight am, which is unusual for a Saturday because usually she doesn't surface until noon. Nerves are eating her up. Somehow, it was different when she invited chaeyoung herself. Like she had control of the situation. Even though Jennie hoped it would be more, she could have always played the offer off as a friendly thing to do, rather than a date. Now it's different. This is the real deal, she keeps reminding herself. She is going on an actual date with Chaeyoung. While going out to lunch makes it slightly more casual, pressure is still there.

As she showers, Jennie wonders where Chaeyoung will take her. As the girl admitted the other day, she still doesn't know the area well. Perhaps Jennie should have offered to take her sight-seeing before Chaeyoung could get her offer in. Not that Jennie is complaining. When Chaeyoung asked for her number, it was an immense relief. Jennie had been worried that it was all one-sided; that Chaeyoung wasn't as interested in her as Jennie was. Now it feels equal. Balanced. Jennie is in control and that is how she likes it.

Although Jennie is twenty-two, that does not stop her being overwhelmed by nerves. Her dating history is rather dry- what Nayeon would call boring- having only had one long-term boyfriend in high school and one short-term girlfriend in college which ended badly. She has been on a few first dates, mostly set up by her friends who feel guilty for flaunting their relationships in front of her but, truth be told, Jennie enjoys being single. She enjoys the freedom, enjoys being able to spend every Saturday lounging in her pyjamas and never having to check her phone. She also doesn't have to feel guilty about her demanding and long work hours. While New York is often viewed as a city for the romantics and the lovers, it is also a place where single people can flourish.

Now Chaeyoung has come onto the scene, Jennie is not sure how to feel.

One of her biggest weakest points is that she falls too quickly. She's known this ever since her relationship with Jongin when she was sixteen. It took one conversation between them and she was head-over-heels. The same with Amara in college. Since then, Jennie has never had to worry because nobody has ever caught her interest. On the dates she has been on to appease her friends, nothing has ever come out of it. Most of the time, Jennie only went for free drinks or food. She never gave them her number nor asked for a second date because it was never something she has been interested in.

Until now.

Jennie has never been with an artist before. The thought of being with a free-spirit is thrilling while nerve-wracking at the same time. Everybody she has ever been with previously has been like-minded to her; Jongin was one day to be the heir to his father's corporation and Amara was a business and marketing major who had little time for her but Jennie understood because she was in the same boat. Truthfully, she has always scorned the bohemians and hipsters in New York. Because floating around the city with no clear plan will get you nowhere. Yet she agreed with every word Chaeyoung said about becoming a musician, wholeheartedly believes she can do it if she puts her mind to it.

She's pathetic.

As she is laying her makeup out on her bathroom counter, her phone begins vibrating. It's Lisa. This is not unusual. She will be coming back from the dance studio and looking for somewhere to crash for the afternoon before a better offer comes up, like clubbing or being taken out for dinner. Something Jennie does not and refuses to offer her.

"Wow, you're actually awake," is the first thing Lisa greets her with.

"Make it quick, I'm getting ready."

"I really love your warmth, Jennie. Has anyone ever told you it's your crowning feature? Wait, getting ready for what?"

"I'm going out," she says casually. While she doesn't want Lisa to know she's going out on a date, she wants her to realise she has some _semblance_ of a social life which will hopefully stop Lisa from trying to drag her out every weekend in the future.

"Where? It's, like, nine am."

"I'm meeting a friend," Jennie balances her phone on her shoulder before putting it on loudspeaker and resting it back on the counter. She starts her routine by massaging moisturiser into her face.

"You don't _have_ any friends," Lisa reminds, not harshly but truthfully. "And you never go out when we ask you to." She pauses and Jennie can practically hear the cogs in her brain. While Lisa may project the image of being a loveable goof, she is actually very sharp underneath her persona. Clearly this is true or else she would not have gotten into one of the most prestigious schools in New York which is where she met Jennie.

"Wait, are you going on a _date_?"

"No," Jennie feigns normality. "Where would I meet someone to take me out on a date? One of my friends from Auckland is over for the week so I said I'd meet up with her. It's kind of a last minute thing."

Lisa hums like she does not believe her but doesn't have enough evidence to counter her. "Well are you two coming out tonight?"

"Not a chance," snorts Jennie. "You know I don't like going to the club. If she wants to, then she can go on her own."

"Boo you're no fun," and then Lisa cuts the call. Not because she is holding a grudge against Jennie's antisocial behaviour, but because she is so hyperactive something else will have caught her attention or she will be calling someone else on her extensive contacts list and inviting them out instead. Jennie takes no offence. This is almost ritualistic for them every weekend. Lisa never stops asking no matter how many times her offer gets rejected. In a way, Jennie appreciates her dedication.

She knows getting ready three hours in advance is a little excessive yet she cannot sit still because of the nerves plaguing her. She will do some housework and call her mom to pass the time, hopefully by then it will be time for her to leave because if she's trapped in her apartment for much longer she may go insane.

In the week Jennie has a maid- of course she does because she has too much wealth for her own good- yet that doesn't stop her taking chores into her own hands. She finds it therapeutic, also it makes her feel more human. Because without housework, she truly would not have anything to do to fill in her time on a weekend. Her lunch plans with Chaeyoung are the first time she has been out on a Saturday in _months_. Not since Joohyun's birthday. It reminds her that Nayeon's birthday is fast approaching, which means she will either have to buckle down and force herself to go or find an adequate enough excuse as to why she can't attend.

The latter option seems much more appealing.

By eleven am she has finished so she Facetimes her mother. Even though it's midnight in Seoul, she will not mind the call. She often waits up on a Saturday so she can speak to Jennie.

Thankfully, Jennie manages to talk to her without accidentally slipping up and telling her about Chaeyoung even though she is dying to. She knows her mother would love her. While it's taken her father much longer to accept her sexuality, her mom was accepting straightaway. Truthfully, her father is still irritated she did not stay with and marry Jongin so their businesses could have merged. While her mom lives in the twenty-first century, her father is still in the dark ages. These kind of things matter to him. How would his business investors feel if they knew his daughter, the heir to the Kim law firm, was with a woman? Morally, he sees nothing wrong with it but it is all about saving face, after all.

Eventually, it's time for Jennie to blow her mother a kiss and say goodbye so she can head out for lunch. She agreed to meet Chaeyoung at the subway station because the younger girl refuses to spoil the surprise, no matter how many times Jennie has pestered her over text. The prospect of heading into the unknown gives Jennie a certain buzz in her blood, spurring her to move her feet faster down the sidewalk. Usually, she would be a part of the faceless mass trooping down the streets of Manhattan all wearing identical miserable countenances. Today, Jennie feels like she is walking on cloud nine. Happiness beams off her, causing her to glow like a beacon. With each step she takes, her height feels lighter. There is an evident spring in her step.

Usually she would never have been brave enough to make the first move, but she is grateful she worked up the courage to ask Chaeyoung out. It's early days, of course, so early that nothing has even blossomed between them; but the excitement and anticipation of something coming from this is enough to make Jennie smile from ear to ear. She doesn't care if she's getting too ahead of herself, this is the most joyful she's felt in a long time so she is going to seize the moment and enjoy every second of it.

Chaeyoung sits on a bench in the subway station, awaiting Jennie's arrival. She fiddles nervously with the sleeves of her jumper, keeping her eyes trained on her lap. All morning, her excitement has been battling with sheer terror making her confused and dizzy and unsure of how to feel. Because she is the one taking Jennie out, the pressure is all mounted on her. It's up to Chaeyoung to lead the conversation. In all honesty, she isn't ready. Or, maybe she is but this is all moving far too fast for her so she feels overwhelmed in the aftermath.

I's going well with Jennie, sure. but they've known each other less than a week- known each other properly for about three days. The worst thing Chaeyoung can do now is overthink and psych herself out. Unfortunately, this is exactly what's happening. Her chest constricts as she struggles to keep her breathing even, in the midst of a panic. She swallows the lump down in her throat, looking up and freezing when she sees Jennie stepping off the train.

The world moves in slow motion. Jennie tucks her hair behind her ear, looking down at the ground, clearly not having spotted Chaeyoung on the bench. The people milling around her fade into the background, all Chaeyoung can do is focus on the girl approaching her who has such a magnetic aura all she can do is stare as time ceases to move. Eventually, Jennie glances up and a smile spreads across her features. Her eyes scrunch in the corners, in a way that makes Chaeyoung's knees feel like jelly. which, makes standing up to greet her extremely difficult.

"Hi," Jennie greets, a little out of breath.

"Hi," Chaeyoung's mouth is now incredibly dry. "It's good to see you again."

"You too. I'm sorry if I'm a little late, the train was late," Jennie rolls her eyes and Chaeyoung feels some of the tension beginning to leave her muscles. The older girl's eyes flicker down to her expensive-looking watch. "Well, would you look at that. I'm just on time."

_Yes you are._

"It's okay. It's actually been quite fun people watching," Chaeyoung remarks. "Imagining what they're up to, where they're going..." She cuts herself off, flushing slightly. "Sorry, that sounded so weird."

"No it didn't," protests Jennie. They're now emerging into the street which, like the subway station, is bustling with life. Somehow it's busier than it has been in the week. There's an abundance of families, young children and teenagers now roaming the city. A particularly chubby little girl toddles past them on reins, making Jennie smile down warmly at her. Although she loves children, she has never given thought into having her own. She wonders how Chaeyoung feels about starting a family? Judging by the dreamy expression on her face upon seeing the little girl, Jennie reckons they're on a similar vein.

"So," the older girl begins in a brisk, business-like manner. "You're going to have to tell me why you've been so secretive."

Chaeyoung inclines her head towards her, having to look down slightly on account of the fact she is a few inches taller than Jennie. I's incredibly sweet, actually. If she so desired, she could put her arm around Jennie and the shorter girl would slot perfectly against her body.

"Because it's a surprise!"

"Ugh," Jennie groans, exaggeratedly throwing her head back. "I hate surprises."

"I can tell," Chaeyoung flickers her eyebrow up. "You've been nagging me for the past two days."

"Listen, surprises are fine for birthday's and surprise parties and stuff but... come on!"

Chaeyoung giggles and taps her nose in a mysterious manner that Jennie finds endearing more than frustrating. She couldn't be annoyed with Chaeyoung if she tried. The girl is far too saccharine for her own good. Jennie doesn't know why someone so kind-hearted has taken an interest in her but she considers herself lucky.

Jennie doesn't recognise the route Chaeyoung is taking her down. They have been walking for a while though, deep into the heart of West Village. This is not a place Jennie often finds herself in. she is only familiar with the subway station and the surrounding area because that is where her train connects to. In the times she has missed her train or been too early, she has wandered the nearby streets as a way of killing time but she has never been around here before. Apparently, Chaeyoung has not either because she keeps consulting the maps on her phone, looking up and nibbling her lips in deep concentration.

Eventually, Chaeyoung stops dead in the middle of the street, much to the irritation of the people walking behind them, and motions to the restaurant in front of them with flourish.

"Sushi!" she announces, looking pleased with herself. Jennie bites back a laugh.

"Wow, I'm impressed you managed to get us here," she teases. "I'm sure you got us lost, like, three times."

"Hey! I was just testing you," the younger girl retorts, still looking at Jennie expectantly for a verdict.

"It looks really nice," she nods. "And I love sushi. Can you read my mind?"

They step inside the restaurant which is already packed with customers even though it's just past lunchtime. Chaeyoung tells the waiter she has a reservation for Roseanne Park, to which they get lead to the second floor of the building. Jennie takes in the decoration, noting how modern and shiny it is; it reminds her of the interior of a spaceship, all gleaming silver and strange things hanging from the ceiling. It's quirky, though it shouldn't work it somehow does. Jennie is intrigued as to how Chaeyoung found this place.

When they are seated, the waiter gives them their menus and tells them he'll be back soon to take their order. As Chaeyoung is looking through hers, the older girl finally has the courage to speak up.

"Why did you use that name?"

Chaeyoung looks up, slightly confused at first until she realises. She didn't expect Jennie to notice.

"I just do," she shrugs, unsure of how else to explain. "I used it at school and work. I guess it's just easier than my real name. Only my family and friends really call me Chaeyoung."

Jennie's heart flutters at the realisation she has been calling her Chaeyoung from the start, something that is reserved for those closest to her. It is probably meaningless, but Jennie refuses to look past it.

"You introduced yourself as Chaeyoung to me," she points out as casually as possible, punctuating this statement with a sip of water.

Chaeyoung shifts in her seat, squirming slightly. Like she is hesitant to answer. Although Jennie should feel guilty for putting her under duress, she wants to know. For her own sanity more than anything.

"I guess... I just trusted you," she mumbles, refusing to make eye contact.

"Trusted me?" she repeats, her voice quiet, like she can hardly believe it.

"Yeah. You seemed so nice, and... I don't know." Chaeyoung brushes the hair out of her face. "It seems stupid saying it out loud but that's why."

"Well I'm flattered," Jennie gives her a reassuring smile, not wanting her to feel embarrassed. "That's probably the first time anyone has ever said that to me so thank you."

They swiftly move on from their heartfelt moment, considering what they want to order. Chaeyoung is aghast when Jennie tells her she wants to try the California rolls with avocado. Jennie then learns that Chaeyoung has a very deep-rooted hatred for avocado which makes her laugh affectionately. The younger girl decides she will try the spider rolls as she has never tasted them, neither has Jennie so she cannot comment. Once their orders have been taken, Jennie rests her elbow on the table, propping up her chin.

"You know, it's so long since I last had sushi," she says conversationally. "I used to eat it all the time in college. My dorm was a few blocks away from this really good Japanese restaurant. During finals I just used to get take out from there."

"Really? I can't remember the last time I had it either. Definitely not in Melbourne," she laughs. "It was so bad there. I went to a sushi restaurant once with my sister and... ugh," she shivers exaggeratedly. "It was awful. From then on I only ate it when we went to see my grandparents."

"Do they live in Korea?" asks Jennie, too intrigued by Chaeyoung's background to refrain from being nosey.

"My grandparent's on my dad's side do. My mom's parents live in France now, would you believe." Chaeyoung folds and unfolds her napkin, playing with it. "It's nice for those who are retired I suppose."

"Have you ever been to France?"

"Alice went but I didn't, it was too close to finals." Jennie guesses that Alice must be Chaeyoung's sister. "I'd like to though. What about you?"

"I've been to Paris a lot," Jennie shrugs. "I think it's my favourite place in the entire world. It's so... romantic and other-worldly. It's like you're walking in a dream, not a real place." Chaeyoung's lip quirks into a small smile at the sudden gleam in Jennie's eyes. She speaks so sincerely its heartwarming. Already, Chaeyoung has decided she would love to visit Paris one day with Jennie by her side.

"Where else have you been?"

"London, Seoul, I went to Switzerland for half a day so I don't think that really counts and I visited Thailand once with Lisa."

"So you're well travelled then," remarks Chaeyoung. Somehow, that doesn't surprise her in the slightest. Jennie seems the type of person who jets off to foreign and exotic countries in her spare time, she probably has a private jet in the midst of it too. Yet, she remains so humble and... kind. This is perhaps what surprises Chaeyoung the most. She's met a lot of girls like Jennie- spoiled, would be an accurate descriptor- and while they were not outwardly nasty to her, they gave off a certain air they truly believed they were better than her. Whereas Jennie treats Chaeyoung like an equal. An old friend. It should not be something to be so impressed by, after all it's just common decency, yet Chaeyoung finds herself more and more in awe with Jennie.

"Not compared to other people," the older girl deflects. "My friend, Jisoo, she's been to every corner of the world. I mean, that's because she's a supermodel but still." She gives her head a small shake. "Sometimes I feel like the world is passing me by while I sit in my office. I thought I had my whole life planned out and knew what I wanted but... it changes all the time. Sometimes I wish... I wish I was like you. Spontaneous. Brave. Not letting anything hold me back."

Chaeyoung startles slightly. She has never been called brave in her entire life, so the words feel alien to her, like Jennie is addressing someone else at the table who isn't present. It takes a few seconds for her words to seep in, leaving Chaeyoung with a tingling warmth that spreads right into her bones.

"I'm not brave," she assures. "I think the word you're looking for is _stupid_. But... I guess nothing is stopping you if you ever did want to do that type of thing. You seem very efficient and capable of doing whatever you put your mind to. But sometimes your mind can be the biggest barrier so I'm not judging you. Maybe one day you'll get to."

Jennie leans forward slightly. "So you don't think I'm a coward?" More for her own reassurance than anything.

Chaeyoung shakes her head. "Of course not. I think what you do is amazing. You're only young and you have such an incredible job and a future ahead of you. You could take over the world if you wanted, Jennie."

In this moment, with her eyes locked with Chaeyoung's, their bodies only a few inches apart, Jennie really believes she could.

When their food comes, they lapse into natural silence. Jennie has come to learn Chaeyoung takes her food very seriously, and would not want to distract her from it. However, the younger girl has other ideas. She wants to keep the conversation flowing.

"Do you want to try some?" she asks, around a mouthful of rice. Jennie looks up, slightly surprised, nodding nonetheless.

"Only if you don't mind. I know how seriously you take food," she teases, making Chaeyoung giggle. She picks up a roll with her chopsticks, cupping her hand underneath it as to avoid any spillages, and feeds it to Jennie. The intimate gesture makes both of their hearts race but they try very hard not to focus on it. Jennie chews thoughtfully, feeling the twinge of spicy mayonnaise on her tastebuds. It's good, so good she wishes she'd been brave and ordered it too. 

"Amazing," she reaches a verdict, making the younger girls smile. "You have good taste, you know that?"

"A compliment I've never heard before but will happily take."

"Do you want some of mine?" offers Jennie, realising it is only fair.

Chaeyoung wrinkles her nose up. "The avocado..."

"I'll pick it out, you big baby," Jennie rolls her eyes affectionately, dissecting the sushi and poking out the fruit with her chopsticks. Once she is certain there is no offending avocado in the roll, she reciprocates the gesture and leans across the table to feed Chaeyoung. At first, she nibbles the edge cautiously to test if there is any avocado but when Jennie prompts her by shoving it ruthlessly in her mouth, she has no choice but to eat it.

Once she has swallowed it down, she looks up at Jennie. "I'm pretty sure I tasted avocado."

"Oh shut up!" Jennie throws her head back and laughs. "I personally picked it all out and I _don't_ make mistakes."

"Oh, really?" challenges Chaeyoung, raising her eyebrow. "I guess I'm going to have to hold you to that one, Kim."

Jennie crosses her arms over her chest, looking smug. "Try all you want. It won't get you anywhere."

Anyone else talking like that would infuriate Chaeyoung, but because it's Jennie, she finds it charming.

Suddenly, a vibrating noise causes them both to jump and stops their poorly veiled attempt at flirting. It's Jennie, of course, nobody calls Chaeyoung these days. The older girl is apologetic.

"Sorry," she says grimly. "It's Lisa. I thought I had my phone on silent."

Chaeyoung sits back patiently and waits until Jennie has finished on the phone, eating the rest of her sushi. Jennie has already finished hers, which Chaeyoung takes as a victory. Clearly she chose the right place to bring her to.

"I told you, I'm out," Jennie says quietly down the receiver. "What do you mean you thought I was lying? You're so annoying. I won't be back for a while so you'll just have to leave, I'm not coming back early." Silence. "No, I took my key off you, remember?" Chaeyoung can just about make out a faint voice from the other end. "Look, you'll have to go bother someone else." Then puts the phone on. She has a slight colour in her cheeks when she looks up.

"Sorry about that. Lisa turned up at my apartment only to realise she was locked out because I confiscated her key because I was so sick of her turning up unexpectedly."

"You two sound close," remarks Chaeyoung. "I've always wondered what it would be like to have a friend who treats their home like it's their own."

"It's annoying, let me tell you," she rolls her eyes. "I love Lisa but... she can be a bit too much." She slides her phone back into her bag, purposefully flicking it onto silent so they have no more interruptions. "I was wondering... would you like to go sightseeing? I don't know if you've looked round already but I'd love to take you."

Chaeyoung's heart is thrumming so loudly she can barely hear herself think.

"I'd love to," she manages to get out. "But I was meant to be treating you today."

"I'm simply repaying the favour," Jennie smiles easily. "So is that a yes?"

"Of course. It's a yes."

***

They spend all day roaming the city. Jennie does not have a set route in mind, she just takes Chaeyoung to the places when and where she sees fit. This is completely fine by Chaeyoung, who is happily allowing herself to get swept along. Although they do not get to see everything Chaeyoung had hoped like the Statue of Liberty Rockerfeller, The Metropolitan Museum of Art; Jennie promises they will go again and make a full day of it. It is extremely reassuring for Chaeyoung to know Jennie is just as invested as she is.

Mid-afternoon, they stop for ice cream. Chaeyoung pays, only because she gets to it before Jennie who is fumbling in her purse for the right amount of change. She pouts and whines and all Chaeyoung does is laugh at her. They sit in Central Park, which is just as incredible as Chaeyoung envisioned it to be. She remarks to Jennie she feels like she is in _Friends_ , and when Jennie remains clueless as to what she is talking about, Chaeyoung takes actual offence.

"What?" she exclaims. "How do you _not_ know what _Friends_ is?"

Jennie shrugs. "I've never been an avid TV watcher."

"Okay, that's it. One day we're sitting down and watching the entirety of _Friends_. And you're going to enjoy it... or else." She bares her teeth playfully and Jennie wants to kiss the strawberry ice cream off her lips.

"Okay, fine. But then I have to introduce you to my favourite show. _Stranger things_."

"Deal." And they shake on it.

***

Chaeyoung doesn't get home until late that night. Nine pm. Although New York is the city that never sleeps, she considers it late in her eyes. The hours she spent with Jennie just melted away and before she knew it, they had to reluctantly say goodbye with the promise they would schedule their next meeting. Neither of them shied away from calling it a date.

She collapses onto her bed, her hair sprawled out around her as she sighs happily to herself. It feels like she's in some kind of fairytale, the magic of New York is finally rubbing off on her.

She is pulled out of her reverie by her phone ringing on her nightstand. For a split second, she hopes it is Jennie who is calling her to say goodnight, even though they just safely said goodbye. However, her heart sinks guiltily when she sees Alice's caller ID. The realisation that Chaeyoung has not yet called her sister after being here for a week hits her like a ton of bricks.

"Chae?" Alice's face fills up the screen, squinting slightly through the pixels. "I didn't wake you up did I?"

"No, I was just getting into bed," she sits herself upright, trying to hide the disappointment in her voice. She feels terrible for not making an effort with her sister after promising her so profusely that she wouldn't let the distance get between them. "It's so good to hear from you."

"Yeah, well, you weren't going to call," Alice sniffs, making Chaeyoung freeze and look down guiltily. "Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I know you've had a busy week. Tell me all about it!"

So Chaeyoung launches into a long and detailed spiel about how her first seven days in New York have been. She tells her sister about busking and earning fifteen dollars in change (which Alice is thoroughly impressed with for some reason) bumping into Jeongyeon in the supermarket and then getting a job in the bakery, consequently making a handful of new friends. There is part of Chaeyoung that is unsure of whether to mention Jennie's involvement in her story as she has played a rather significant role, but decides against it in fear that it never goes any further.

"You've definitely landed on your feet," Alice remarks with a smile. "I'm so happy for you. I knew this move was just what you needed."

Chaeyoung squirms in guilt. "I really am sorry for not calling. I promise I will more regularly, I just needed to settle in."

"Don'f apologise. I shouldn't have said anything." Her sister pauses, stroking her cat which has slowly crawled onto her lap at the sound of Chaeyoung's voice over the loudspeaker. "Have you met any nice girls?"

"I told you about the girls at the bakery."

Alice rolls her eyes at her sister's innocence. "No, idiot, I meant any nice girl who you could potentially date."

"Oh! Um... no," the younger sister lets out a breathy laugh. "I-I don't think that'll happen for a while. Besides, where would I even meet anyone? I've hardly left the house."

It burns her insides like acid to lie to her sister's face, but to save face and embarrassment, she must. If her and Jennie's time together comes to an abrupt halt (which she hopes will never happen but you can't be too sure) then it will be a lot easier to pretend it never happened if her family don't get involved. Plus, it would just be too painful and humiliating to admit it all went wrong. No, it's safer this way. If she continues to see Jennie then she may trust her sister enough to tell her. For now, it will remain a secret.

***

On Monday, Jennie is at the office before Mr Arnold. He almost drops his briefcase in surprise when he sees her lingering by the door that is still locked.

"Miss Kim," he announces. "It's good to see you took our conversation last week to heart."

"Of course, sir," she smiles placidly because she is in too good a mood to let her boss get to her. She's had the most wonderful weekend in Chaeyoung's company and the magic is still lingering on this dreary Monday morning. It will probably be squashed out of her as the day wears on but for now, Jennie is holding onto it for as long as she can.

Before she can steal away to her cubicle to enjoy some serenity before her colleagues arrive, Mr Arnold invites her into his office for a quick cup of coffee before the others turn up. Jennie sees no other option than complying with him so quickly whirls on her heel to follow him into his domain.

Mr Arnold moves over to his personal coffee percolator because he's far too important to slum it in the staffroom with the rest of them. Not that anybody would want him to. His presence does a good job of unnerving them and sucking the atmosphere and joy out of the room. When Mr Arnold is around, everyone is immediately on their best behaviour. Jennie has no idea how joohyun copes with the pressure of being his PA. Probably because she is just as brusque.

Awkwardly, Jennie settles herself on the chair until the coffee has finished brewing. She takes it milk, two sugars. Whereas her superior takes it black- not that she is surprised. She takes it and mutters a quiet thanks, blowing on the surface to cool it down slightly. The other staff should be arriving soon and if she is caught brushing shoulders with Mr Arnold she will be taunted for weeks to come, particularly from Taehyung who enjoys winding her up.

"Did you do much with your weekend, Jennie?" he asks, swivelling his chair to face her.

"Not a lot, sir," she replies. "Just caught up on some paperwork-" not a complete lie, this is what she spent the majority of Sunday doing in between texting Chaeyoung. "-and I saw a friend on Saturday, but that's all."

"That friend wasn't Miss Im was it? I notice you two are close."

"Oh we've been friends for a while, sir." Jennie wouldn't expect someone as busy and important as Mr Arnold to notice her and Nayeon being practically joined at the hip. She is surprised he even observed this at all. "But, no. It was a friend from Auckland." Since he will never know, Jennie decides to roll with the lie she told Lisa.

"Do you ever think about going back to New Zealand, Jennie?"

"I...I don't know," Jennie blinks, feeling wrong-footed. "This isn't... you aren't firing me, are you, sir?"

To her utter surprise, he chuckles. "Not at all. You're one of the best lawyers I have and for that I'm grateful. I was just wondering, that's all."

Jennie has known Mr Arnold since she was knee-high. She can't remember a time when he wasn't around. Him and her father met straight out of college and when her father had the idea to create his own law firm, Benjamin Arnold was right behind him. It's always been those two, quite like how it has always been Jennie and Jisoo. Because of this predetermined connection, Jennie supposes she has a stronger bond with her superior than the rest of the people in the office; though that doesn't stop him from being terrifying.

"Truthfully, Jennie, your father asked me to catch up with you." Ah, so that was his ulterior motive. "He hasn't heard from you in a while and he's quite concerned. He doesn't think you're coping. I told him not to worry but you know what father's are like."

Jennie doesn't, really. Not in the sense most children know what their parents are like. Me Kim has always kept Jennie at arms length, acting more as her boss than her actual father. To know he's concerned about her is the most surprising thing out of this whole situation. She should've known he was incapable of asking himself so he would send someone else. And what does he mean she's not coping? Jennie takes offence at this. Does he not think he's good enough? He gave her this internship because she worked incredibly hard in college and deserved it. This revelation stings.

"I'm okay, sir. Honestly," Jennie puts her mug down on the desk. The coffee has turned sour and the milk has curdled in her stomach. "It's nothing I can't handle."

"I know this Fletchford case has been putting a lot of pressure on you-"

"I know, but like I said, nothing I can't handle," She flashes him a smile that's entirely false but it seems to do a good job of smoothing over his worries.

"Your word is good enough for me, Jennie. I'll tell him when I next see him." Which will undoubtedly be before Jennie does. "Take care."

She tries to mask her frustration as she walks out of his office, careful not to slam the door or stomp her feet too loudly. She makes a beeline to her cubicle, avoiding eye contact with those who are just coming into the office and hanging up their coats. They turn to one another inquisitively, wondering why Jennie has been called into Mr Arnold's office so early but she ignores their calls.

Slumping down in her chair, she picks her phone out of her bag and sends Chaeyoung a text.

**Jennie (8:58am): i know this is totally selfish but can i see you at lunch? i'll come to the bakery, i just want to talk to you**

**Chaeyoung (8:59am): of course, i'll be there. are you okay jen?**

She doesn't reply, not feeling strong enough to lie to her.

Leaning back, Jennie exhales deeply out of her nose. She doesn't know why this has bothered her so much, her father's aloofness has never affected her before. Maybe he's right, maybe she has bitten off far too much than she can chew. When she took the Fletchford case on, she really thought she had a lead. It was a tricky investigation about embezzlement in one of the biggest department stores in Manhattan. But after weeks of dead ends, Jennie is realising now that she shouldn't have agreed to it. Her father did try to warn her, but she has always been strong-willed and thought she knew better. As it turns out, he was right. One again.

Jennie buries her head in her arms, face down on her desk. Nayeon pokes her cautiously, unsure of what mood she will be in when she rears her head. Fortunately for her, Jennie has no strength to be angry.

"Hey," she greets her dully.

"Hi," Nayeon's eyebrows are drawn together in concern. "Are you okay? What did Arnold want?"

"Nothing. I got here earlier and he asked if I wanted coffee."

Her friend's eyebrows shoot up her forehead in disbelief. "Really? What did you talk about?"

"Our weekends."

"Oh..." Nayeon's voice trails off, knowing Jennie has put her wall up and it's futile to try and get through to her when she's in this mood. Instead, she gives her best friend a sympathetic pat on the shoulder and turns to her own desk. Hopefully silence will wheedle it out of Jennie, it usually does. Most of the time she cracks under pressure and blurts it out, no matter how hard she tries to be emotionally closed-off and unavailable.

However, much to Nayeon's surprise, she keeps this bottled up all morning. When she is about to ask Jennie if she wants anything getting for lunch, Jennie has grabbed her coat and bag and is already leaving the office. Nayeon simply watches, feeling hopeless. She wishes there was something she could do for her. She hates when Jennie gets like this. Normally she is such a dry, witty and talkative person, to see her silent and unresponsive is unnerving.

"She okay?" asks Taehyung, sitting down in Jennie's chair.

Nayeon shrugs. "I don't know. She didn't say a word to me."

Taehyung pops a corn chip into his mouth. "Robbie said that Fletchford case is a real bitch. He worked on it before she did and he said he couldn't make anything of it. Maybe it's that."

"Yeah, well," Nayeon leans forward and helps herself to his chips. "She'll never accept any help off me so I won't bother saying anything." Once she has finished chewing her mouthful, she speaks up again. "And you shouldn't say anything to her either. I know what your intent is."

"What?" the black-haired boy asks innocently.

"You want to get in her pants."

Taehyung looks affronted. "I've known her since college! I wouldn't do that." Nayeon rolls her eyes, ignoring his statement. While Taehyung might not see the way his eyes linger longer than necessary on Jennie, or the way he has a particular smile reserved just for her, or how he bends over backwards to help her- Nayeon does. And while Taehyung is a nice guy overall, she doesn't trust him. Maybe it's just because she's protective over Jennie and her romantic naïvety.

Plus, the drama in the office would be _way_ too much.

Halfway across town, Jennie is walking down the familiar street to get to the bakery. The white and pink sign swaying gently in the September breeze is like a beacon of promise to Jennie, because when she gets in there she will see Chaeyoung and everything will be all right.

It's Sooyoung at the counter when Jennie gets there, who offers the disgruntled girl a warm smile that would usually make her day but somehow can't penetrate Jennie's sadness today.

"Hi, Jen," she greets her. "What can I get you today?"

"Actually I'm here to see Chaeyoung," she says. She waits for a comment or a little giggle, but somehow Sooyoung can sense the waves of irritation rolling off her and scurries in the back room to find said girl. Moments later Chaeyoung emerges and she is like the brightest of suns on Jennie's crappy, rainy day. She almost cries from joy.

"Hey," Chaeyoung says, softly. In a tone she's never taken with Jennie before. _She's worried, that's why._ "Are you okay?" Jennie feels bad now for leaving her texts on read all morning but one, she has been swamped with paperwork and two, she didn't want to vent to Chaeyoung over text while they were both meant to be at work. There is also an element of cowardice that slots in there somewhere but Jennie won't admit to that.

"I'm okay," she nods, and she is, now Chaeyoung is here- as pathetic as that sounds. "Do you mind if we just stay here today?"

"No, of course not. There's a table over there, go sit down and I'll get my lunch from the fridge." Chaeyoung disappears again and immediately Jennie feels her absence. She goes across the café to sit at the only unoccupied table in the place, right in the window. It feels exposed and vulnerable to be sat there with passers-by able to stare in as they please but Jennie cannot find it in her to care. She sits down heavily at the table, waiting for the girl to come back.

"I brought you a sandwich," Chaeyoung holds it out to Jennie like some sort of peace offering. "When you text me earlier I.. made you one."

Jennie's heart feels like it's being squeezed in a vice. She takes the heavy paper bag with the first genuine smile of the day. "Thanks, Chaeyoung. I really appreciate it, you don't have to go through all this effort."

"I like it," the younger girl shrugs. "Jeongyeon is teaching me how to make sandwiches as dumb as that sounds. And Seungwan said it's your favourite so..." She trails off awkwardly, only now realising how annoying her rambling is.

Chaeyoung snaps open her plastic container of pork stir fry she made last night and deliberately left extra so she could have it for lunch. Her and Jennie didn't have lunch plans so she had to take matters into her own hands. Perhaps hoping to spend every lunch with Jennie was a bit too much to ask.

"So," she begins around a mouthful of beansprout. "What did you want to talk about?"

Jennie shrugs, picking at a lettuce leaf. It isn't that Chaeyoung's sandwich is bad, it's more the fact her stomach is too turbulent to eat anything. "Nothing bad. I... I just wanted to talk to you."

"Well, here I am. So fire away."

Where can Jennie begin? Because dumping twenty-two years worth of familial problems on Chaeyoung just isn't fair, but for Chaeyoung to understand the story she needs a bit of background. Is the third date- is it too generous calling this a date?- the right time to talk about your unresolved trauma? Or does that come later?

"It's my dad," she begins, slowly, still unsure of where this is going. "I don't even know where to start."

"From the beginning," Chaeyoung prompts, looking up at her earnestly.

Jennie knows full well she can't start from the beginning, so she compromises. "My dad is a businessman and... I never saw him a lot growing up. It was always me and my mom. And then I moved to Auckland when I was nine, then came straight to New York to college." Chaeyoung is still listening patiently. "I miss my mom so much, like, it's insane. When I moved here with my dad, I tried to have the same bond with him because I thought it was just because we were in different countries that we weren't close. Turns out he just doesn't like me much." She lets out a small, bitter laugh.

Chaeyoung frowns. "Jennie I'm sure that's not true-"

"No, it is. And it's fine. I accepted that long ago. I never knew why my parents had me anyway. But today..." Jennie deliberates her next words. She doesn't want to drop the bomb on Chaeyoung that her father is the owner of one of the biggest and most prestigious law firms in New York, terrified the younger girl will start to think less of her. "My boss is my dad's closest friend, they've known each other since they were in their twenties and today he pulled me into his office telling me my dad is 'concerned' about me. That he doesn't think i'm coping well with this case. It sounds so dumb saying it out loud but I guess it just hurt me that he couldn't pick up the phone and ask me himself." She slumps in her chair.

"It isn't dumb," Chaeyoung argues immediately. "Obviously you want to have a bond with your dad, everyone does. I know why you're hurt and you have every right to be. It isn't that hard to pick up a phone and ask how your daughter is doing if you're so worried about them." What Chaeyoung doesn't know is that it is extremely hard for Mr Kim to do this on account of the fact he is so busy running a multi-million dollar company. But that is a story for another day.

"Even if it's just a phone call or seeing him for a few hours a week, your dad should still make the time to see you," Chaeyoung carries on. "Maybe he has his reasons, I don't know. But you're not selfish for wanting that, you're not even asking that much. But one things for sure, it won't mean he doesn't love you despite what you think."

Just like that, Chaeyoung has suddenly made everything better again.

"Thanks, Chaeyoung," Jennie whispers, too scared to look into her eyes in case she does anything foolish like kiss her. "I... that means a lot to me. To hear it from you."

The younger girl offers her a smile. "It's the least I could do, Jennie. Besides, I love giving people advice. It makes me feel like a fairy godmother or something."

Despite her low mood, Jennie laughs.

***

Jisoo is in New York that weekend which, unfortunately for Jennie, means she cannot spend the weekend with Chaeyoung like she had hoped. When Chaeyoung pouts about it, Jennie throws her arm around her and tells her she'll see her soon (she tries not to blush because it feels nice to share body heat this close.)

Although Jusoo is based in New York, technically, she spends three days at Jennie's apartment, claiming that her real home doesn't feel like home and Jennie is more than accommodating. She enjoys having someone to share her apartment with because she too gets lonely.

Despite the world changing at a pace too quick to keep up with, Jisoo never does. Jennie greets the normality with open arms because when she's with Jisoo it's just _simple_. It always has been. Spending time with Jisoo is like the little slice of normality Jennie is deprived of in her everyday life.

They spend Saturday in Jennie's apartment watching some k-drama Jisoo has recently become obsessed with, having started it on one of her many long haul flights and now cannot stop watching until she has finished all the seasons. Jennie tries to follow the plot but spends the majority of her day texting Chaeyoung instead. Although she is meant to be at work, she finds the time to keep the conversation with Jennie going which makes the older girl's heart flutter. Chaeyoung tells her about her plans to go busking tomorrow morning and Jennie wonders if she can slip out of the apartment early enough for Jisoo not to notice. Her best friend is a late riser.

"Who are you texting?" demands Jisoo, craning her neck over to try and look at Jennie's phone. She shies away, clutching it protectively to her chest.

"No one."

"Doesn't look like no one," she remarks, arching a perfectly plucked eyebrow. Jisoo has these luxuries because her face is plastered over all of the couture, high fashion magazines. Jennie did have an eyebrow lady once, but has not visited her in a few months.

"It's just one of my friends."

"The one from Auckland?"

Jennie internally curses Lisa for being such a loud mouth. of course she told Jisoo, probably to see if she could find evidence of Jennie's lie. Amazingly, Jisoo seems to believe the story but that is just Jisoo. She is the kind of person who holds everything at face value and trusts Jennie enough to refrain from questioning whether she is telling the truth or not. This factor makes Jennie's insides burn hot with guilt. Jisoo is her oldest and best friend, she should feel comfortable enough to tell her. And, truthfully, Jennie has been dying to spill her guts about it.

"Um, not exactly," she replies. "I told Lisa that to get her off my back. I met her a couple of weeks ago at the bakery-" not exactly a lie "-and we really hit it off. She's called Chaeyoung."

Jisoo nods understandingly, realisation washing across her features. "Ah. So you like her?"

Jennie shrugs, feeling extremely childish. "I don't know. Maybe? I like spending time with her." Truthfully, Jennie knows she does indeed like Chaeyoung. A lot. The moment she saw her in the subway playing her guitar, Jennie knew she _liked_ her. But how ridiculous does it sound admitting you've fallen for someone in such a short amount of time? While Jisoo is understanding, Jennie does not want her to think she's taking things too fast or being hopeless. Because, in the past, she has been known to have her moments.

"Well as long as you're happy that's the main thing," her best friend says with the same wise tone she has had since she was a little girl. Jisoo has always been years before her time, it is one of the many things Jennie greatly admires about her. She is so wise and mature, Jennie only wishes she could behave in the same manner.

She snuggles into her best friend's side under the fluffy blanket. Jisoo chuckles and pats her comfortingly on the head.

"Now let me watch this and remember how lonely and single I am."

"It isn't for lack of trying," Jennie rolls her eyes. "How many people have asked you out on dates before?"

Because Jisoo is a model, she is not short on offers of people who want to take her out. but they only want to brag about it- that they took infamous Kim Jisoo on a date but it didn't go well because she was a bitch- or what they would say to preserve their bruised ego when Jisoo turned down their advances. Although the girl would never admit to it, she wants a love like on her k-dramas. She wants something wholesome, something devoted and something enchanting. She wants to be swept up in romance- to be swept off her feet by the one.

Who that is is yet to be determined.

Jennie takes her out for dinner that night, a candlelit table at Jisoo's favourite tapas place. Jennie makes a mental note to bring Chaeyoung here if their lunch dates ever evolve into something more serious like a dinner date.

"Tell me about Chaeyoung," the older girl says, unprompted. This shocks Jennie slightly, who is at a loss for words at first because where does she start?

"She's a musician." Jisoo refrains from rolling her eyes because _of course_ Jennie has fallen for an artist. "She works at Jeongyeon's bakery but I saw her busking in the subway station before. Though we didn't get to talk for long."

"Is she good?"

"She's amazing," Jennie is not bothered by how hard she is gushing. "She plays the guitar and... everything about her is just so perfect. She moved from Melbourne to New York a few weeks ago because she wants to be a musician."

Jisoo cocks her head in interest. "You don't think you could help her along?"

Jennie squirms in her chair slightly, this thought has crossed her mind too. "I- I don't know. I wouldn't want to be condescending."

"Jennie," her best friend gives her a flat look. "If she wants that then why would it be condescending? She'd probably be grateful to you forever if you did," she wiggles her eyebrows suggestively which makes Jennie burst out laughing. Even talking about Chaeyoung makes her heart feel light.

Jisoo senses this and does a poor job at suppressing her smile. If anyone deserves to be hopelessly enchanted with someone, it's Jennie. She has not had much experience in the world of romance and what she has been through has left her scarred. It's a new opportunity to find love and Jisoo wants it for her more than anything.

"So when do I get to meet her?" teases Jisoo.

Jennie pulls a face. "Never, if I have anything to do with it."

"Hey!" she protests, taking mock offence. " _I'm_ fine, it's the other one you need to worry about."

"Please don't tell her," Jennie urges, eyes wide with earnest. "I mean, obviously I'll tell her but just... not now. I need time."

 _I need time to make sure I'm not just getting in over my head with this_ , _that Chaeyoung wants me the same way I want her_.

"Of course," Jisoo smiles. "Just take it slow. and if Lisa gives you dating advice, don't take it."

***

Chaeyoung doesn't see Jennie on Monday or Tuesday. She tries not to worry about it, Jennie just assures her she's buried under with work and when the opportunity arises she will ensure to take her out for lunch- it's her treat this time around. Chaeyoung trusts her and knows she has no business prying into Jennie's personal life, but she cannot help being concerned. The last time she saw Jennie she was so... limp. Lifeless. So unlike her usual witty, lively and charismatic self. Chaeyoung knows people can have off days, or days where they do not feel like bearing themselves to the world and she completely understands- sympathises with Jennie. She just wishes... Chaeyoung doesn't know _what_ she wishes exactly. That her and Jennie were closer so she could be there with open arms for her? Or for Jennie to trust her enough to tell her the truth because Chaeyoung could sense she was being fobbed off when she explained what was wrong. She would have never dreamed of calling Jennie out for it, but she was painfully aware. Even though they are still technically strangers, Chaeyoung feels like she has known Jennie so much longer; like she flew out to New York with her from Melbourne. This is the once in a lifetime bond you have with someone, Chaeyoung doesn't care if she sounds like a hopeless romantic; but she isn't prepared to lose Jennie yet, not when she hasn't even had the opportunity to have her.

On Tuesday night, Jennie texts her, apologising profusely for being MIA and says lunch is on her tomorrow. Chaeyoung rears up in bed and punches the air victoriously, not caring if she looks like a high-schooler.

Before work on Wednesday, Chaeyoung stops into the small florists on Cornelia Street and buys a bunch of baby pink roses. Hopefully Jennie will see the humour, if not then it's still a nice gesture. When chaeyoung gets to the bakery, Jeongyeon smirks but finds a vase for her to put them in so they don't die before Jennie can get them. Even though Chaeyoung does not utter a word for who they are for, the girls figure out immediately and keep sending her teasing smiles or nudging her with their elbows. She does her upmost best to ignore them but her happiness is contagious and she can't bring herself to act stern.

The bakery is packed all morning so Chaeyoung can barely give their lunch date a second thought, which is a relief in a way because it stops the nerves eating her insides. She knows she doesn't need to be worried- it's only Jennie after all- but the last time they saw each other, there was an apparent shift in their dynamic. Whether this is because Jennie opened up and showed her vulnerability to Chaeyoung so this- _whatever_ is going on between them- feels much more solidified and authentic in a way. Jennie trusted Chaeyoung enough to show that side of her, which suddenly smothers Chaeyoung with pressure. Can she be responsible for holding Jennie's trust in her hands? Jennie is sensitive. As much as she tries to obfuscate this side of herself, Chaeyoung could tell with the way she opened up so willingly the other day. Can Chaeyoung trust herself to not let Jennie down?

Her stomach is in knots when Jennie comes to pick her up at lunchtime. Thankfully, she seems much more chipper today. A genuine smile graces her features as she walks up to the counter to greet Chaeyoung. The customers have thinned out so they have chance to talk.

"These... are for you," Chaeyoung swallows awkwardly and hands the bunch of flowers out before Jennie can even greet her.

The older girl's eyes widen and her mouth drops open slightly, staring at the roses in shock for a moment before she takes them carefully in her hands, handling them as if they were as delicate as glass.

"Chaeyoung," her eyes are slightly misty. "You shouldn't have. No one has ever bought me flowers before."

Dahyun and Sooyoung watch discreetly from the doorway of the staff room, smiling to themselves.

"I thought they'd cheer you up," the younger girl tells her, truthfully. "I know you've been under pressure with work... I know they won't help but-"

"No. Thank you so much," Jennie leans across the counter to embrace them. It's awkward with the obtrusion in the way but Chaeyoung's skin crackles with electricity when they make contact. Jennie feels it too, little zips of energy making their way to her heart. "Is it okay if I keep them here in water?"

"Of course," Dahyun sweeps in and takes them off her hands, giving Chaeyoung a small push on the small of her back to get her going.

As her and Jennie are ambling outside, Jennie turns to her with a smile. "I just realised, you got me roses. They're you!"

"I was hoping you'd notice," she smiles, a little shy all of a sudden. "Plus I just thought they were really pretty."

Right now Chaeyoung would like nothing more than to take Jennie's hand and walk boldly down the street with her, hand-in-hand. But she can't, because she is still unsure of whether there is an unspoken boundary between them. How would Jennie react if she made the first move? But will Jennie ever make it?

Jennie makes the wise choice to take her to a gelato place a few streets away. It's small, quaint and red-brick and Chaeyoung falls completely in love with it before she's even stepped foot inside. She finds New York a bizarre yet enchanting mix of old and new, she supposes this is all part of the city's appeal. Every day she falls more and more in love with the place.

With Jennie by her side, how could she not?

Inside they are greeted by a blast of warmth which is much appreciated because even though it's early September, the air is steadily becoming more frigid. Chaeyoung is ecstatic at the prospect of spending her first Christmas in New York, hoping it will be as spellbinding as it is in all the movies. Although she's meant to be returning to Australia for Christmas, the thought is becoming less and less appealing. Chaeyoung has had twenty-two summers in Melbourne, she wants to enjoy her new life in New York.

As it turns out, the gelato place also is a small café. They are seated upstairs in the loft space that's been purposefully decorated to look vintage. Between them they agree to share a stack of Nutella waffles with strawberries and whipped cream which sounds just perfect to Chaeyoung. While their lunch dates have been enjoyable thus far, the simplicity of this one really makes her heart swell for some be known reason.

"So, I need to ask you something," Jennie begins which makes Chaeyoung's throat close up with fear. "And you can say no, I wouldn't blame you. But it's my friend Nayeon's birthday next weekend and we're throwing a birthday party for her and everyone is asking if you want to come."

Chaeyoung is pulled short. "Everyone?" she repeats, puzzled.

"Yeah. The girls in the office," Jennie tries to play it off casually but there is a certain rosiness to her cheeks. "They know about... you, and they want you to come. It'd be like a plus one thing, but they want to meet you too. Like I said, it's up to you."

"Do you want me to come?" the younger girl asks, suddenly intensely meeting Jennie's gaze.

"Yeah of course I do," she says without hesitation. This is good enough for Chaeyoung.

"It's a deal," she smiles graciously, holding her hand out for Jennie to shake. She stares at it for a few moments before she twigs on, giving her hand a shake that could be considered tighter and longer than necessary but she certainly isn't complaining.

Their pancakes come and Chaeyoung almost cries with how good they are. She tries not to hog the whole plate but in the end Jennie simply laughs and allows her to finish it off, saying she's saving herself for some gelato for dessert. Chaeyoung laughs at the motion they've had dessert for lunch and dessert, but with Jennie life is so sweet that it makes sense.

They go downstairs to the gelato stand to choose what they want. Jennie opts a cherry chocolate chunk gelato while Chaeyoung selects mango sorbet- her favourite. They go back upstairs to eat it, taking longer than necessary because neither of them want to return to work.

"How did it go with Jisoo this weekend?" Chaeyoung inquires, scooping out some sorbet with the spoon for Jennie to try.

"It was great," the other girl replies, licking her lips. "Wait, that's so good! I'll have to get that next time." She feeds chaeyoung her gelato and the younger girl says the same thing. "Anyway... yeah, I miss Jisoo a lot. Nowadays I don't get to see her as much. She never wanted to be a model, she went to college to be a psychologist. She just got scouted one day."

"At least she won't have to worry about student loans," Chaeyoung jokes. "Can she pay mine off too?"

Jennie laughs. "She still needs to pay off mine." Chaeyoung reckons she is just joking because someone with seemingly as much money as Jennie would not need to worry about something like that. She must be saying it in an attempt to not make Chaeyoung feel bad.

"You have so many friends it's hard to keep up," Chaeyoung remarks, not snide, just honest. Jennie is a social butterfly, a trait Chaeyoung wishes she also possessed.

At this, the older girl frowns. "I'm sure you do too. It's just harder now you've moved away from Australia."

Honestly, Chaeyoung did not have many friends to begin with which was one of the deciding factors to why she even moved here in the first place. Yet she doesn't want Jennie to know this and think less of her- to take pity on her for being some sort of antisocial freak. So she remains quiet. Jennie can interpret her silence how she pleases.

Though, this something she doesn't want Jennie to know- not wanting the older girl to pity her or even worse, scorn her. Chaeyoung is trying her best to not mar her image in Jennie's eyes. So far she has been successful, but all it takes is one slip up.

When she does not answer, Jennie directs the conversation until they have to return to work. For some reason, today Jennie finds herself even more reluctant to say goodbye to Chaeyoung. Perhaps this is simply because the girl seems to melt away all of Jennie's worries outside the office and she feels safe and secure with her- without a care in the world. Jennie only wishes she could feel this carefree all the time. Unfortunately, duty calls and she has to return back even though she is loathed to. An invitation to invite Chaeyoung to dinner one night is on the tip of her tongue yet it dissolves before she can choke it out. Jennie scolds herself for being such a coward, having such a fierce fear of rejection that it holds her back from reaching out for what she really wants.

And, right now, she wants nothing more than Chaeyoung.

***

As the weekend draws nearer, Chaeyoung is starting to realise she might have made a mistake in so amicably agreeing to accompany Jennie to Nayeon's party. The girls at work reassure her it will be fine because they are attending too- but that isn't what is the root of Chaeyoung's nerve. no. What she is worried about is how she is supposed to act around Jennie when surrounded by strangers- Jennie's closest friends. She wants to know exactly what Jennie has told her friends about her, about their friendship. Are they strictly friends? Or has Jennie hinted to her friends that there is something blossoming between them? While Chaeyoung feels it very strongly, Jennie may not reciprocate the feeling so she has to be careful. What if Chaeyoung embarrasses Jennie and she regrets inviting her, and they never talk again? Suddenly, the pressure becomes far too much.

"Chaeyoung," Jeongyeon tells her firmly when they are wiping down the tables at the end of the day. "Everyone will love you. Shouldn't you be happy Jennie invited you?"

Yes, Chaeyoung _is_ glad Jennie invited her. It's a step in the right direction, alluding to the idea that one day Jennie might want to one day make things serious between them. For now, Chaeyoung will just work on the basis they are going as friends and will not push anything between them. That way, it will save the awkwardness of Jennie rejecting her. Chaeyoung has always played it safe, she is not about to stop now.

After work on Friday, the girls of the bakery go shopping for new outfits on Saturday. Although they don't really need to, they do anyway because they've had a long week at work and need to unwind. Jennie expresses how she wished she could have joined them but is too busy at work, Chaeyoung smiles as she types out a text telling her she wishes she could've made it too. This only makes Sooyoung tease her mercilessly.

Chaeyoung has explored quite a lot of Manhattan by now, but has yet to become familiar with the shops. Jeongyeon directs them to the nearest mall- the Manhattan Mall- which is about a thirty minute walk away. None of them want to fork out the money for a cab so they walk, they don't particularly mind. It's a mild September afternoon and their spirits are lifted by the prospect of clothes shopping- for such contrasting personalities they all share the common love for shopping and spending unnecessary amounts of money. Dahyun links arms with Dhaeyoung and they surge forward, skipping and giggling so much their sides hurt. They don't give a second glance to the passers-by eyeing them warily. Chaeyoung hasn't felt so contented in such a long while- apart from when she is with Jennie- so she relishes in this feeling, refusing to let anything spoil it.

They arrive at the Manhattan Mall and Jeongyeon begins to reel off their itinerary, her natural leadership instincts kicking in. They go to H&M first, and Chaeyoung marvels at how immense the store is compared to the likes of in Melbourne. She could spend all afternoon in here, truthfully. She is still stood slack-jawed in the entrance while the other girls have quickly dispersed to find which garments they want.

Jeongyeon told her it would be formal, but not ball-gown formal.

("Does that make sense?" Jeongyeon had asked when she told Chaeyoung. "No _dress_ dresses, but you need to wear a _dress_."

"Um, I think so," she agreed. "So no prom dresses?"

"She gets it!" the girl had exclaimed, mock-punching her shoulder.)

So no floor length gowns, but Chaeyoung compromises and still looks for a dress but something more casual. While all the dresses on the rack are pretty, Chaeyoung doesn't like a single one of them. Seungwan convinces her to take a few and try them on in the fitting room, but one glance each of them and Chaeyoung knows she isn't going to have any success in here.

Sooyoung finds a satin, little black dress that she looks stunning in. Chaeyoung smiles and tells her she looks gorgeous- because she does- yet she cannot help the small pin pricks of jealousy. At first she's startled at these bitter feelings, Chaeyoung never usually gets like this considering she is such a laidback person at the best of times. But there is something about the way Sooyoung looks so casually beautiful that makes Chaeyoung's blood boil slightly. She wishes she had her confidence, had her looks and charm. Maybe that way Jennie would start to see her as more than a friend...

The younger girl gives her head a shake, surprised by her sudden onslaught of self-deprecation. She's unsure of where it came from, probably an aftermath of the frustration of not being able to find a suitable dress. Seungwan tells her not to worry, that there'll be plenty more opportunity to look. Chaeyoung, who thoroughly does not want to spoil the afternoon, plasters a wide smile on her face and tries not to feel so disheartened.

They head to TopShop afterwards which perks Chaeyoung up considerably. It is one of her favourite stores, where she lived in Melbourne their TopShop was one of the biggest attractions at their local mall. As soon as she steps inside and the UV lights hit her retinas, she feels at home. What she likes about this store is at they all look the same. This is the closest she's felt to home in the weeks she has been here, causing a sudden wave of homesickness to wash over her. So far she has managed to avoid this, being too caught up with her new life to even give her old one consideration. Ultimately, she is enjoying her time in New York far more than Melbourne but Australia is her _home_. It will always remain that way no matter how long she lives in America. She just misses... the simplicity. Her life was so mechanical, so routinely structured that Chaeyoung was lulled into a sense of comfort and security. She wasn't living but... she was safe. Now all Chaeyoung knows is uncertainty, to which Jennie has not particularly helped. If Chaeyoung was a braver person she would confront the older girl. But she is _not_ pushy, she is not ready to hear what Jennie has to say because with one word she could ruin everything and bring Chaeyoung's world crashing around her. It's a dangerous thing to bear your heart to someone you barely know, yet it's too late for Chaeyoung to change it. Somehow, she wants Jennie to have her heart- even if that means she could break it so easily.

Chaeyoung doesn't find anything in TopShop, which is when the panic begins to set in. She needs this weekend to go perfectly, because what if this is the time where she can change Jennie's mind? What if Saturday is the opportunity to persuade Jennie to feel the same way about her? It might be the only opportunity. Because while their lunch dates are sweet and familiar, they are safe. On Saturday they will enter uncharted territory and that is where everything could change.

It has to.

Jeongyeon puts her arm around her shoulders and tells her not to lose hope. The mall is huge and they will find Chaeyoung the perfect dress or so help her god. Although it lingers unspoken, all the girls know how important it is for Chaeyoung to find the perfect outfit because she is going with Jennie and needs to impress her. Jeongyeon feels the same way even though she feigns confidence. She won't let the other girls know how she truly feels about Nayeon in fear of rejection, because Nayeon is so alluring and hypnotic what would she ever see in Jeongyeon? Jeongyeon knows she is a fool for even pandering to the idea, yet she cannot help her mind wandering.

Just as Chaeyoung is about to lose hope, she breaks off from the rest of the girls, reassuring them she'll meet them in the food court when she's done. Seungwan offers to accompany her but Chaeyoung gently tells her she doesn't need to. This is something she wants to do herself, she doesn't want to drag the other girls with her. They've been patient enough as it is.

Chaeyoung ducks into a Macy's, while she likes this store she doesn't know if her friends would tease her for setting foot in here. They seem too cool to shop somewhere like this, but Chaeyoung has run out of hope now. If this doesn't work, then she will simply give Jennie an excuse as to why she can't attend tomorrow.

She is slowly circling the racks, handling the dresses and inspecting each one closely. Swallowing roughly, she tries to get rid of the tears of helplessness already building in her throat.

That's when she spots the dress.

It's nothing extravagant, quite plain in comparison to the other ones on the clothing stand. But as soon as she lays eyes on it, she knows it's _the one_. It's simple- a short, silk, rose pink dress with spaghetti straps and a ruched chest. When she tries it on, a smile threatens to crack her face open. It's perfect. All the searching and frustration finally led her here. And it's not ridiculously priced- even if it was she probably would have still purchased it.

Once she has finished paying, she hurries back to the food court, hoping the girls haven't been waiting for her too long. Thankfully, they are just sitting down with their trays. Dahyun bought Chaeyoung's meal for her, which she thanks her profusely for. Chaeyoung doesn't know what she did to deserve such wonderful friends. Maybe it was all the friendless and isolated years she spent in Australia, all building up to this moment, to sit down with a group of girls with a swollen heart and a feeling of upmost contentment. Perhaps fate was simply making Chaeyoung wait because good things were soon going to come her way.

"Did you find anything?" asks Sooyoung, biting the end off one of her french fries.

"Yeah, it's so gorgeous."

"Jennie won't be able to resist," teases Jeongyeon. While Chaeyoung laughs it off, her heart contracts. That's the plan, though she'd never admit this.

If Jennie doesn't feel the same way, she doesn't know what she would do. She doesn't know if she would have the strength to continue being her friend- as selfish as that sounds.

"Do you like her then?" Seungwan inquires, cocking her head inquisitively.

"Of course I do. She's one of my best friends."

The other girls collectively groan, Dahyun and Sooyoung collapse against each other in mock exasperation and Jeongyeon pretends to slap her forehead with the heel of her hand.

"She meant _like_ like her, dummy!" Dahyun exclaims.

" _Like_ like?" Chaeyoung repeats with a snort. "How old are you, twelve?"

"You're the one acting like a kid with a crush," Sooyoung points out, which does an adequate job of shutting her up. Chaeyoung shrinks slightly in her seat, hoping the ground will swallow her whole. She isn't used to being this open and honest with personal matters such as crushes. She's never had enough friends to become accustomed to this, as pathetic as it sounds. This new environment of upmost honesty and delving deep into her deepest, darkest secrets is all new to her.

"She does!" crows Sooyoung. "She's blushing!"

"Shut up!" Chaeyoung hisses, a strand of hair falling out from behind her ear and covering up her peony cheeks. Instead of making jokes, the girls just coo and talk about how cute it is. Chaeyoung should feel slightly patronised, but she is too intent on keeping on their good side so just plays along. It's easier that way. She does not want to alienate the only friends she has in this city.

That night when Chaeyoung returns to her apartment, she gets into bed and texts Jennie.

**Chaeyoung (9:27pm): i finally found a dress!!**

**Jennie (9:29pm): yay :D can i see?**

**Chaeyoung (9:29pm): nope or it would spoil the surprise :P**

**Jennie (9:30pm): all the more reason to look forward to seeing you tomorrow then**


	3. three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw// very very brief mention of suicide at the end of the chapter

"We need to lay down some ground rules."

The girls are getting ready at Jennie's with pre-drinks seeing as she has the biggest apartment. It's her, Nayeon, Joohyun and Nayeon's best friend since high school, Jihyo. Jennie likes her a lot, they clicked as soon as Nayeon introduced them the first time a few years ago. Jennie holds Jihyo with a lot of admiration- mostly for putting up with Nayeon for so long and always treating her with the utmost of patience.

Nayeon rolls her eyes, almost smudging the eyeliner she has just applied. "What, _Mom_?"

"No throwing up," Jihyo counts her rules off on her fingers. "No trying to kiss me again like you did last time because that was just weird. You're coming back to my apartment whether you like it or not. When I tell you you've had enough to drink you'll listen to me or I'll tell Sunmi you were the one who broke her Sailor Moon statue." At this, Nayeon pales. "And _no_ making out with strangers."

Jennie sips her rosé and smirks over the rim of her glass at Nayeon's affronted expression.

"Would I ever?"

"You don't need to worry about her making out with strangers, the only person she has eyes for is Jeongyeon," Joohyun teases, making the birthday girl shriek with indignation and shove her down roughly onto Jennie's bed. The older girl laughs loudly, echoing off the walls and Jennie cannot help but smile herself at their banter. It is so refreshing to see Joohyun so careless outside of the office. When she is away from Mr Arnold's demands and the weight of paperwork is removed from her shoulders she becomes a different person. She does not unwind often, but when she does, it's in these moments when Jennie remembers why she loves her so. And, ultimately, why she respects her so- because she is so dedicated to her job.

Jihyo grimaces. "I can already tell tonight is going to be a disaster. You're half-drunk already, Nayeon."

"It's my birthday, let me have some fun," she sticks her tongue out and resumes putting her makeup on at Jennie's vanity. Jennie does not use it often, preferring to do her makeup in the lighting of the bathroom. She got ready before the other girls arrived, knowing there was no sense in attempting to put makeup on when she had alcohol in her system. Unfortunately, Nayeon did not have enough sense to do this. Joohyun had to keep wiping off her smeared lipstick and on the third attempt she finally got it right. 

"You're quiet, Jen," Joohyun remarks, their eyes finally turning to her. All night Jennie has been blending into the background, not wanting to begrudge Nayeon the attention on her birthday. Besides, when amongst friends, Jennie naturally takes a backseat. Sometimes her shyness gets the better of her and she lets other people dominate the conversation. When around cocksure Nayeon and mother goose Jihyo, it is not difficult to slip in the background unnoticed.

"I'm okay," she sips her drink in assurance. She doesn't particularly want to drink but Nayeon brought the bottle round so she thought she better show willing.

"Are you nervous about seeing your date?" Jihyo's interest is now piqued, no longer fussing over her best friend.

"She isn't my date," Jennie corrects her automatically. It is what she has been saying to her friends all week and somehow the message has not yet sunk in.

"Do you want her to be?" Joohyun questions, inquisitive eyes burning a hole right through Jennie. The older girl looks at her like she is transparent, like she knows what Jennie is thinking better than Jennie knows.

"I mean... no?" Jennie replies, knowing it is a lie as soon as it slips past her lips. "I like her but... I don't think she feels the same." As soon as she finally confesses this- as it is left floating in the air- it becomes too real and painful. She has been avoiding thinking about it for the past few days.

"I call bullshit," Nayeon suddenly announces, Jennie had almost overlooked her presence in her few moments of silence. "You've been joint at the hip for the past few weeks. If she didn't like you then she wouldn't make this much effort."

Jennie squirms uncomfortably in her chair. While she has thought this through plenty of times, the possibility of Chaeyoung actually reciprocating Jennie's feeling and not breaking her heart is just too slim. All Jennie knows is heartache and failed relationships- why would Chaeyoung feel be different? Clearly it is Jennie who is the problem. she doesn't blame Chaeyoung for being unable to fall for her.

"Maybe tonight everything will come out," Nayeon continues. "Just don't take the attention away from me."

At this, Jennie cannot help but burst out laughing. Trust Nayeon to be so brutally honest. Perhaps this is what she loves the most about her friend. There is never any uncertainty with Nayeon, you always know what she is thinking because she is more than happy to share it. Her certainty keeps Jennie grounded. She has never told Nayeon this, though maybe one day she will.

Jihyo checks the time on her phone. "We need to leave in ten minutes if we're going to get there on time. You better get a move on Nayeon and get into your dress or we're leaving your ass behind."

At this, the birthday girl stands up and promptly stumbles over her own feet. Fortunately Jihyo is prepared for this and reaches out to catch her before she even trips, as if sensing it will happen before it actually does. The relationship Jihyo and Nayeon have together- childhood best friends and being so in sync it is unnerving at times- reminds Jennie of her and Jisoo. She feels a pang in her heart at the thought of her, she couldn't make it tonight because of work no matter how hard she tried to get the night off. Lisa cannot make it either on account of the fact she is on a plane to L.A. at this very moment.

("The life of a choreographer is very demanding, don't you know?" Lisa had told Jennie over the phone. She hadn't known, so kept her mouth shut _._ )

Nayeon just thinks they are going to the bar to meet their closest friends for a few quiet drinks (though nothing is ever relaxed or calm when Nayeon and alcohol are in the mix). What she doesn't know is that they have hired a nightclub that is full of people she doesn't expect to be there. Jennie and Jihyo organised most of it, Nayeon's other close friend Sunmi) had sent out all the invites. Nayeon's parents had agreed to pay for the nightclub so all it was left for Jihyo and Jennie to do was book it and ensure they organised it on a weekend where everyone was free. Aside from Jisoo and Lisa, they have managed this disconcertingly well. In fact, things have almost gone _too_ smoothly. Jennie is waiting for something disastrous to happen and ruin the night.

Hopefully it does not involve her and Chaeyoung. The last thing she needs is to get her heart broken in front of all her friends after she has just confided in them that, yes, she _does_ indeed have a crush on the girl.

The younger girl is getting ready at Jeongyeon's apartment with Sooyoung, Dahyun, Seungwan and Dahyun's friend, Sana. Jennie has only met Sana once when they coincidentally happened to be in the bakery at the same time, but she is very nice. Besides, they needed as many people as possible to fill the nightclub. Jihyo vaguely knows Sana so gave Jennie the all clear to invite her. Nayeon will be so smothered in adoration she will hardly notice.

Eventually, once Joohyun has helped Nayeon into her short, purple dress (Jennie humoured her friend and put a purple streak of non-permanent dye in her hair the occasion) they are ready to leave. Jihyo hailed the Uber prematurely so he is waiting outside of Jennie's apartment building for them. He looks a little uncomfortable at the tangle of giggly girls who smell like wine clambering into the back of his SUV but doesn't say a word. Joohyun puts a blindfold on Nayeon as to not spoil the surprise which makes her pout in indignation. Jihyo gives the driver directions and they are soon on the way.

Jennie looks out of the window, too distracted to join in with the mindless chatter. She is thinking about Chaeyoung, even though she is humiliated to own up to it. Everywhere she looks in New York reminds her of the girl- particularly the lights that pass the car in a blur. As trite as it sounds, that's the affect Chaeyoung has on Jennie- she just lights her up. Makes her feel like a completely new person. Something that no one has ever evoked out of Jennie, not even when she was sixteen and in the honeymoon phase with Jongin.

The thought of being so vulnerable to a girl she hardly knows scares Jennie, probably more than anything. Chaeyoung has the capacity to completely ruin her, even if she doesn't know it. Jennie has become so accustomed to her presence over the past few weeks she does not know what she would do if Chaeyoung was no longer there. That is why tonight has to go flawlessly, because Jennie does not want to risk losing her.

The nightclub is not a long ride away, about twenty minutes top. It's in the flashier part of Manhattan, a place the girls have become accustomed to. They thank and pay the driver before climbing out of the car. Nayeon gropes the air in front of her, vision still obscured from the sleeping mask that is acting as a blindfold. They all made a promise to not take it off before Nayeon got into the club, no matter how much she whines.

Which is a lot.

Jennie looks down at her phone to see the all clear text from Jeongyeon (Chaeyoung kindly gave her the number) so they begin shepherding the birthday girl inside. She digs her heels into the sidewalk and demands they tell her where she is or else she won't step foot inside. With a roll of her eyes, Joohyun shoves her in the small of her back over the threshold.

Jihyo unties the blindfold and the second she does, a banner falls from the second floor of the club reading ' _Happy Birthday Nayeon_ ' and an abundance of balloons are released from the ceiling, as well as the partygoers shouting 'happy birthday!' at the top of their lungs. Nayeon takes a stumbling step backwards, her hands flying to cover her mouth. Her eyes are glistening with tears as she turns to her friends, her lip wobbling. She then throws her arms around them tightly, expressing her gratitude in between sobs and sniffles.

"Enjoy yourself, birthday girl," Jennie smiles, rubbing her back.

Nayeon doesn't need telling twice. Ignoring everyone else around her, she is off like a shot in the direction of the bar. Joohyun shakes her head affectionately, all of them thinking something along the line of ' _typical_.'

They go into the crowd to mingle. Jennie spots Jeongyeon in the crowd almost immediately, meaning Chaeyoung will be close by. Her throat closes at the prospect of seeing her. She has seen Chaeyoung countless times in her work uniform and jeans and cardigans on a weekend. Will Jennie's heart stand being able to see her dressed up looking more gorgeous than she already does? If Jennie already decided she didn't want to get too drunk and embarrass herself in front of Chaeyoung, she would need copious amounts of alcohol to get her through this.

Jeongyeon waves at them and begins walking over. A few people follow her but it's impossible to tell who they are in the mass of bodies who have already began dancing. The DJ has already started his set. The party now in full swing.

It is obvious Jeongyeon has made a lot of effort. Jennie bites her lip, but knows this is for Nayeon's benefit. The girls have a perfect opportunity to get together tonight, she just hopes neither of them spoil it by getting too drunk and behaving foolishly. Nayeon has a bad habit of doing this, hence Jihyo's strict rules. Jihyo has been assigned the role of the sober friend but she is used to this. Jennie offered but the younger girl assured her she would be fine.

Seungwan walks up to Joohyun and kisses her softly on the lips. The two have been dating for two years, having moved in together six months ago. Not entirely too far away from Chaeyoung lives. Even though Jennie has known them for so long, it is still strange seeing brusque Joohyun melting and softening towards her girlfriend. It seems unnatural, somehow. Though these thoughts could slightly be poisoned by jealousy on Jennie's side.

"Where's the birthday girl?" she asks her girlfriend.

"Straight to the bar," Joohyun shoots Jeongyeon a raised eyebrow look. "If you want to join her..." The short haired girl gets the hint, politely excusing herself and hurrying off to find Nayeon before she becomes too swarmed by her adoring fans. Jeongyeon must have had a few drinks before she came too, because usually she would not possess this confidence.

For a moment, Jennie worries that Chaeyoung has not come because she cannot find her anywhere. She didn't come with the group of bakery girls who have all come over to them. Jennie tries not to be rude while greeting them, making an effort to greet Sana in an attempt to get to know her better. But really, her mind is preoccupied. Dread begins to settle in her belly at the realisation Chaeyoung has stood her up. As painful as it is to accept, Jennie knew this would happen. It was all too good to be true.

Then she sees her.

It's like a moment taken straight from a movie. Time slows down and the crowd seems to part to make way for Chaeyoung, who is framed by an angelic white glow from one of the strobe lights. She is dressed in a figure-hugging silk dress, clinging to her every curve and the ruched material emphasises her chest. Her long legs are accentuated by gold heels. Her makeup is not heavily applied, but more than she usually wears. Her long, dark hair falls ramrod straight down her back. All Jennie can do is stare at her, feeling her jaw go slack. Her heart is having such fierce palpitations it feels like it is about to burst out of her chest.

When they lock eyes, Chaeyoung offers her a small, soft smile. Like she is shy.

Jennie has no idea how she is going to survive the night.

"Hi!" Chaeyoung greets her breathlessly. "You look amazing!"

And she does. Her hair hangs in teased waved framing her face, her features accentuated with minimal makeup because she's so naturally beautiful she doesn't need to overdo it. She wears a two piece which looks incredibly sexy; a see-through lace top with a black bra and a tight skirt and black heels. Chaeyoung has to swallow hard to stop her heart leaping out of her throat. She has only ever seen Jennie in her office attire or comfy outfits when they meet up on a weekend. Seeing this side of her feels oddly personal to Chaeyoung, but she loves it. Jennie looks incredible. The older girl has no idea what she does to Chaeyoung. Tonight these feelings are worse than ever.

"You look... beautiful," Jennie compliments her. "I knew I would love your dress."

Chaeyoung ducks her head, blushing slightly. "Your outfit is incredible. Is it designer?"

"Chanel," she shrugs, like it's no big deal. Chaeyoung supposes when you have the amount of money Jennie does, designer labels do not carry the same weight. While Chaeyoung would have to save up for months for such luxurious garments, Jennie probably swiped her credit card without second thought.

"Wow," the younger girl lets out a whistle. "You could wear a trash bag and still look good though."

"Stop," Jennie giggles, trying to ease her nerves though it's incredibly difficult. "You're too smooth."

"I'm not even trying to be," Chaeyoung smirks and raises her eyebrow slightly and wow, that's new. Jennie has never seen that expression before. It is incredibly sexy and does a good job of knocking the air out of her lungs. All she can do is stare at Chaeyoung in a panic, unsure of what move to make now.

Kissing her would definitely be a step too far even though Jennie wants nothing more.

"So, do you think Jeongyeon and Nayeon will get it on tonight?" Sooyoung wiggles her eyebrows, making Jihyo choke.

"Sooyoung!" she exclaims, swatting the girl. "You can't just say that!" 

Jennie then realises she has failed to introduce her slightly insane but lovely group of friends to Chaeyoung, even though they have been nagging to meet her all week.

"This is Jihyo, Joohyun and Nayeon the birthday girl has disappeared but she should be back soon. Girls, this is my friend Chaeyoung."

The girls raise their eyebrows knowingly, in their circle 'friend' either means a companion or someone you're helplessly in love with you're just too scared to admit it. Nonetheless, they offer Chaeyoung warm smiles and greet her like she's an old friend. The tension in her shoulders seems to dissipate.

"Hi," Chaeyoung waves shyly at them, the gesture is completely endearing. Jennie doesn't see the soft expression on her face whilst looking at her, but her friends don't miss it. "It's really nice to meet you guys." 

"You too," Joohyun smiles. "I've already heard so much about you from Seung. She says you're one of the nicest people she's ever met. _And_ you make the best chocolate chip cookies in the world."

"Oh my god," Chaeyoung groans in embarrassment. "Seung, how could you embarrass me like this?"

"I was being nice!" the girl laughs. "I won't bother next time." She pokes Chaeyoung's side jokingly which makes her dissolve into laughter. Chaeyoung is everything Jennie described her to be and more. The girls can see why Jennie has become head over heels for her in such a short amount of time.

The girls linger on the edge of the dance floor for a while chatting amongst themselves before Sooyoung and Joohyun disappear to get drinks, deep in conversation. They have known each other for years, their parents being good friends. It's strange how their friendship group is all interlinked somehow, making them like one big, dysfunctional family. But they wouldn't have it any other way.

"Your friends seem really nice," Chaeyoung shouts over the thumping music.

"They like you," is all Jennie says. Because it's so obvious, in the way they smile at her and hang onto her every word, listening intently to everything she says. They aren't being accommodating for Jennie's sake, they genuinely seem taken to her. Which is hardly a surprise. Chaeyoung has the skill of making everyone in her vicinity fall in love with her.

"Really?" A small bubble of hope rises in Chaeyoung's chest. "Gosh I'm so relieved. I was really scared no one would like me here."

 _They're infatuated with you. Me included_. The words are on the tip of Jennie's tongue but she is unable to get them out.

Just as she is floundering awkwardly, Nayeon's presence sweeps in like a small tornado. Obviously in the time they have been apart, she has been taking advantage of her free drinks. There is a rosiness to her cheeks that wasn't there before and when she stands still, she sways on the spot slightly. Even in the dull lighting of the club, the glint in her eye is unmistakable.

"Hi!" She greets. "What have I missed?"

"Not much," Jennie shrugs, then swallows. Introducing Nayeon to Chaeyoung is the moment she has been the most apprehensive about. Although Nayeon would never maliciously say something, she often sticks her foot in it accidentally. Whether she will be able to hold her tongue, who knows. Especially when she has had so much to drink. "Nayeon, this is Chaeyoung."

This is the moment of the truth. The moment that could make them or break them.

To Jennie's utter surprise, Nayeon manages to act like a civilised human.

"Hey!" She embraces Chaeyoung in a quick, Tom Ford scented hug. "It's so good to finally meet you. Jennie has told us a lot about you, so have the girls at the bakery."

"Really?" This makes Chaeyoung flush. Although she never admitted it to Jennie, Nayeon was the person she was the most nervous about meeting. She's heard enough from Jennie and the girls at work to know her personality, and it worried Chaeyoung because they are such contrasting people. She thought Nayeon would immediately hate her for being shy. Apparently it’s the opposite.

"Totally! I'm so glad you could make it." Nayeon takes a sip of her drink. "Do you want anything? Drinks are on me."

"Oh! Um, I hadn't really thought about it. What are you drinking?"

"Sex on the beach," she winks, making the breath stick in Chaeyoung's throat.

"Okay, I'll go get one," she smiles, trying not to let the nerves roll off her. Nayeon has given her a command, and she must follow it. "Jen, do you want anything?"

"I'll have the same."

Chaeyoung heads off into the crowd. Jennie turns to her best friend with an unreadable expression. Nayeon is too tipsy to worry about whether she is about to lecture her. However, by some miracle, it is not.

"Thank you," Jennie says, sounding so utterly sincere it sobers Nayeon up for a moment. "This means a lot to me."

"I know," Nayeon smiles, resting a hand on Jennie's shoulder. "Which is why I'm doing it. You put up with a lot of my shit so I can only do the same for you. Plus, I like her. She's cute."

Instead of bristling, Jennie just smiles easily. Nayeon's approval meant more to her than she realised. Probably because Nayeon can be a harsh and brash person at times, so if she had not liked Chaeyoung then Jennie wouldn't have known where to turn because they hold so much importance in her life. And doesn't everyone want their crush and friends to get along?

 _Crush_. Jennie sounds thirteen again.

When Chaeyoung comes back laden down with two drinks, Nayeon swoops away again having heard someone call her name. Chaeyoung takes no offence, knowing she has many people to speak to tonight. She's grateful for the opportunity to be left alone with Jennie for the first time all night. It almost feels like something has shifted between them in the short space of time they have been here. Perhaps Chaeyoung is simply overreacting, yet something tells her Jennie can sense it too.

"I've never had one of these before," she motions to her drink. "It's really good. Tastes like fruit juice."

"I think Nayeon only ordered one to be risqué," Jennie rolls her eyes. "But yeah, they're good." She needs to be careful because with the way the cocktail is slipping down her throat as easily as water, she will soon be too inebriated to stand. That is not something she wants Chaeyoung to have to experience. Last time she got drunk with Lisa she was horrendously sick all over the dance floor and had to stop her cab to be sick in a gutter, then passed out in Lisa's bed and soaked the sheets with gin sweats. She shudders at the memory.

"I'm enjoying myself," Chaeyoung nods, looking around the packed club. "Thank you for inviting me."

"You don't have to thank me. I wanted- no, _needed_ you to be here." Jennie then realises what she has accidentally let slip, so takes a sip of her drink to mask her unease. Chaeyoung is just looking at her with soft, innocent smile that she only reserves for Jennie- but the older girl does not know this yet.

When they finish their cocktails and put the empty glassed down at a nearby table, Jennie holds her hand out for Chaeyoung to take, who, at first, blinks at her in confusion.

"Dance with me?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

Jennie leads her onto the dance floor, right in the centre of crowd. At first Chaeyoung is self-conscious, aware of how many bodies are gyrating around her. Then, she thinks: _who the hell cares_?

Chaeyoung finds herself lost in the rhythm and Jennie's magnetic pull. She knows she's a good dancer but has always been too bashful to showcase this. Then she sees Jennie's dance moves and simply follows, like it is the most natural thing in the world. Jennie is so cool and assured that of course she is a brilliant dancer too- is there anything this girl can't do? As each song rolls into the next, their bodies are drawn together until they are moving only centimetres apart. Jennie can feel the heat radiating from Chaeyoung's body and it ignites her insides. She resists the urge to reach out for her hips and bring her closer, knowing that this is a step too far. Even though Chaeyoung would not disagree in the moment, Jennie does not want to risk it. Things have been going perfectly so far.

Eventually, when they are too hot and sweaty, Jennie breaks away to get them more drinks. This time she plays it safe with a vodka and coke, knowing she can pace herself this way. Chaeyoung is left awkwardly on the dance floor, trying to avoid making eye contact with someone she doesn't know. However, she spots Dahyun and Sana stepping onto the dance floor so they make a beeline over to her.

"Hey!" Dahyun shouts over the music which is particularly loud in this area. "How's it going?"

"Good!" Chaeyoung calls back. "I'm having a really good time!"

"How's it going with Jennie?" asks Sana, who became filled in with Chaeyoung's predicament while they were getting ready. Even though Chaeyoung has only known the girl for a few hours, she already loves her. She is so carefree and bright and bubbly it's hard not to fall for her ditzy charm. Chaeyoung is so glad she has found such a solid group of friends, something she never expected to experience this many miles away from home. Though, maybe _this_ is the reason she has made so many.

"It's... good," Chaeyoung pauses her dancing slightly. "I don't know whether it's too soon to make a move."

Dahyun grabs ahold of her shoulders and shakes her. "You need to make a move now while you're tipsy but still sober enough to know what you're doing. You won't get a more perfect time than now!"

Maybe Dahyun is right. But Chaeyoung's pride still cannot stretch to this. Her and Jennie could be entangled in this circle for the rest of the time, yet she can't bring herself to make the first move. She needs to know Jennie feels exactly the same before she does anything. Right now, it's all so uncertain and blurry. Maybe that's just the liquor.

"Want me to ask her?" offers Sana.

Chaeyoung's eyes widen to the point they almost pop out of her head. "No!" She blurts. "No way! That would be so... humiliating." 

"No it wouldn't," the blonde girl is puzzled. "At least that way you'd know, right?"

Chaeyoung supposes there's that about it, though it all seems so childish to get her friends to go behind her back to reaffirm Jennie's feelings about her. Chaeyoung is twenty-two, a grown woman. This is something she needs to control on her own because this is the hardest test she has faced yet in her adult life, even more tasking than moving across the world and starting afresh. No. Chaeyoung is on her own in this. As much as she appreciates her friend's help, she cannot allow herself to take it.

Before anything more is said, Jennie returns. Her smile widens when she sees the two girls have joined them so they dance and talk together for a while, the atmosphere much more relaxed due to their presence. While it was just Jennie and Chaeyoung it was... electric. Intense. Terrifying. Chaeyoung had never felt anything quite as intense as swaying her hips dangerously close to Jennie's and then looking into the girl's dilated pupils. It scared her. Made her realise just what is at stake here.

There is an even more distinct lack of privacy when two boys join them, people Chaeyoung is unacquainted with. At first, jealousy flares up inside her when she sees them greet Jennie so amicably. Then she reminds herself to reel it in, because she has no ownership of Jennie and she can be friends with whoever she likes. Chaeyoung just wishes they weren't so _attractive_.

"Chaeyoung, this is Taehyung and Seokjin," she motions to the two boys who wave appropriately once their names have been given. "I work with them."

Taehyung holds his hand to his chest in mock offence. "Is that all we are to you, Jennie? I'm hurt."

Jennie rolls her eyes and hope begins to stir in Chaeyoung's chest. "Jin is Jisoo's cousin. That's how I knew him before."

"Yeah, I guess you could say I'm the disappointment of the family," he laughs easily. If he's this handsome and only Jisoo's cousin, Chaeyoung cannot fathom how beautiful Jisoo can only be in the flesh. Apparently photographs don't do her justice- or so she has been told. Suddenly, Chaeyoung begins to feel very out of her depth.

"I'm sure that's not true," she replies awkwardly. "You're a lawyer, right? That's something to be proud of!"

Jin turns to Jennie with a smile. "I like her. Keep her around."

Chaeyoung almost misses the sudden flush creeping on Jennie's cheeks, but she doesn't. 

The conversation is moved swiftly on to a work related topic which makes Chaeyoung feel awkward. She tries to look attentive, nodding in all the right places and pretending to understand the jargon. Eventually Jennie shoos them away, warning them not to spoil her weekend where she doesn't want to think about work.

"Sorry about that," the older girl says. "They're annoying, but Jin is like a big brother to me. I've known him forever. And Taehyung is okay, I guess."

"They seemed... nice," Chaeyoung replies limply. This simply makes Jennie chuckle, before going to refill their drinks.

By now, Chaeyoung is so warm and overwhelmed she needs to take a bathroom break. She's sure she'll easily find Jennie when she returns, so she doesn't worry too much. When she asks a passer-by she discovers the toilets are on the second level of the club which is a trek. As soon as Chaeyoung begins to walk up the stairs dizziness washes over her and she starts giggling uncontrollably. She has to lean against the railing for support.

"Woah," Jeongyeon comes up from behind her, holding onto her elbows to sturdy her. "I think you've had too much, Chae."

"Don't be- don't be silly," she brushes her off. "I'm fine," she says stoutly, jutting her chin to prove a point. "Anyway I thought you'd be with Nayeon."

"She's gone to the bathroom. So if you see her, tell her I'm waiting."

"How's it going?"

Jeongyeon looks slightly shy. "Good, I think. Maybe it's just because we're drunk but it's good. Hopefully we remember in the morning."

Chaeyoung hopes so too. She wants to remember this magical night with Jennie for as long as she lives.

Nayeon is indeed up in the bathroom, surrounded by a group of girls fawning over her and posing in the mirror taking photos. Chaeyoung tries to slip by unnoticed but somehow gets dragged in. Usually she would not have the confidence to chat so openly with strangers, but with the vodka in her system she does. Chaeyoung likes this feeling of airy carelessness. Perhaps she needs to drink more often.

When she ventures back downstairs, she spots Jennie lingering at the bottom of the stairs, her arms crossed as she paces. Her restlessness ceases immediately when she lays eyes on Chaeyoung, relief flooding over her.

"Thank god you're safe, I was worried about you!"

"Sorry, I got caught up in the bathroom by Nayeon and her friends."

"Were they okay with you?" Jennie asks out of concern. It isn't that she thinks Chaeyoung is incapable of looking after herself, but she knows firsthand how catty and abrasive some girls can be. And Chaeyoung is so sweet Jennie can't bear the thought of her falling victim to this.

"Yeah, they were really nice. Why?" Chaeyoung's heart skips a beat.

 _Because you're too beautiful and it wouldn't surprise me if they were jealous of you and tried to tear you down_.

Jennie smiles. "No reason. I'm glad you made friends."

The younger girl's breath is still stuck in her throat. "Oh. I-I thought you were jealous or something." Then freezes once she realises the words have slipped out of her mouth. "I'm sorry I really didn't mean that. I think I'm a bit drunk."

"It's okay," the older girl laughs it off. "I get it. C'mon, I requested the DJ so we have to go dance." 

As it turns out, as well as being utterly gorgeous, incredibly intelligent, unwaveringly charming and charismatic; Jennie also has impeccable taste in music. When Ariana Grande's _E_ _veryday_ blares from the speakers, Chaeyoung cracks up laughing in remembrance of once telling Jennie that it was one of her favourite songs on one of their lunch dates. The people around them cheer once they hear the opening chords of the classic and begin dancing accordingly.

"Jennie," Chaeyoung wheezes, winded from laughing and dancing simultaneously. "You're too funny." Beside them, Taehyung begins grinding on Jin, who turns bright red and tries to stop him, which only makes the girls shriek with laughter even more, leaning against each other for support.

Then _kiss me thru the phone_ begins playing, a high school classic Chaeyoung remembers dancing to at her senior prom. For a moment, her and Jennie make brief eye contact and Jennie wonders if now is the right time to kiss her. It would be humorous and they would indeed remember it, but is it really appropriate?

Fortunately she does not have much time to dwell on her decision because Sooyoung and Sana barge their way in and dance with them, singing the lyrics loudly over the music. Then Jin and Taehyung come over, unable to resist the urge to dance with a handful of gorgeous girls. Chaeyoung finds enough courage to begin shimmying with Taehyung, devising a small routine of; shimmying, pretending to pick up the phone, blowing a kiss to each other and then turning around for a quick booty pop. Everyone around them applauds and urges them to continue, a few people even pick up on the dance and start doing it themselves.

Jennie steps back and watches from a distance, looking at Chaeyoung adoration. Seeing her having so much fun and being sociable sets her heart alight. In this moment Jennie realises that Chaeyoung's happiness means the world to her.

Soon, the whole dance floor has picked up on their infectious dance routine and Jennie finds herself lost in the mass, mindlessly copying the routine too. When she first considered bringing Chaeyoung here, she had no idea how quickly she would take to it. Truthfully, Jennie expected her to be a bit of a wallflower, which would only feed her knight in shining armour complex. However, Chaeyoung has completely exceeded expectations. Hopefully she starts to see New York as more of a home now she has made so many new friends.

The song rolls into Mariah Carey's _O_ _bsessed_ , this is when Jennie knows it is her time to shine. Chaeyoung just watches Jennie's body move and sway, dumbfounded. The girl oozes so much confidence it takes her breath away, and everyone else's in the vicinity. It is then, with an amused smile, Chaeyoung discovers that Jennie is a real diva. The way she sings the lyrics with so much sass is a whole different side to the sweet girl Chaeyoung has become to know and grow fond of these past couple of weeks.

Apparently Jin also knows this song well, so he too joins in. Which is so hysterical to Chaeyoung and Sana, who almost spill their drinks from laughing so much. At some point in the chaos Dahyun joined them, she is giggling too into her vodka and orange juice.

It has to be said, Jennie and Jin make an incredible duo. Their charisma is too large to be contained in the club and all eyes are drawn on their performance. Judging by the smooth, calculated and almost mechanic moves; something tells Chaeyoung they already had a routine planned to this song. Perhaps Jisoo played a part in it too. The thought fills Chaeyoung with indescribable warmth. Seeing Jennie enjoy herself after knowing how stressed out she has been lately is a pleasure to watch. Chaeyoung would never begrudge her this, no matter how much she wants to claim Jennie as her own.

Once the song has finished, Jennie fans her face which has become shiny with a sheen of sweat. "I'm exhausted. I need a rest."

"Here," Sooyoung thrusts her a drink. "Have some of this." Jennie takes a tentative sip and then chokes, grimacing.

"What the hell is this?" she demands, still gagging.

"It's vodka and coke, but only with a splash of coke."

"It's attempted murder!"

Sooyoung rolls her eyes and snatches it back. "You're just a lightweight, Kim. Even Chae is drinking you under the table."

"Excuse me!" Chaeyoung protests. "I'm stood right here!"

Sooyoung only ruffles her hair in what might seem patronising to anyone else, but Chaeyoung has quickly become accustomed to it. "I'm going to try and find Seungwan. Jihyo told her and Joohyun they weren't allowed to hump each other in the middle of the club but when I left them they'd broken that rule."

Jennie turns to Sana. "Wasn't Yerim meant to be here with her?"

The blonde girl shrugs. "She's in Seoul visiting her grandmother. She's had a heart attack or something." Jennie's face falls. She hadn't realised. She'll have to send her a bouquet of flowers when she returns.

"Wait, who's Yerim?" asks Chaeyoung, confused because she had never heard this name before and a little hurt Sooyoung has never told her who she is.

"She's Sooyoung's roommate. They're secretly in love with each other," Sana laughs. "Just like everyone else in this group." Chaeyoung laughs too, a little uneasily, her words hitting too close to home for her liking.

At this moment, the music playing over the speakers abruptly stops causing everyone to cease dancing and look around in confusion. Then, a single spotlight drops from the ceiling and illuminates Nayeon stood on the balcony with a microphone in her hands. Jennie rolls her eyes, wondering what dramatic antics her friend is about to get up to. Just by looking at her, Jennie can tell she is wasted.

"Everyone," she slurs, holding onto the railing for support. "Thank... thank you so much for coming and making this the best night ever!" A whoop and applause comes from the crowd, Chaeyoung finds herself joining in subconsciously. "And thank you to my... my amazing friends who organised this surprise!" She points towards Jihyo who is stood a few feet away from her with her head in her hands, obscuring her face when the spotlight lands on her.

Then, there is a strange noise from the microphone and everyone cranes their necks to see where the noise came from and what happened to Nayeon.

As it turns out, she has passed out on the floor.

The party goers are undeterred, even though the birthday girl is now dead to the world- something as trivial as this is not going to spoil their night. Dahyun and Jennie exchange glances before bounding up the stairs to assist Jihyo. Apparently her rule of Nayeon pacing herself wasn't taken into consideration. Did she really think it would be?

Along with the assistance of Seungwan, Jihyo has managed to get Nayeon upright and loops her arm around the girl's waist to keep her in the standing position. How they will manoeuvre her out of the nightclub is a different matter. Maybe if they all take a limb...

"We're going home," Jihyo says firmly. "I _knew_ she'd do this!"

"In fairness, telling her to behave herself was futile," Jennie points out diplomatically. Jihyo simply sighs, knowing she is right. "C'mon. I'll call an Uber and then we'll get her outside."

Because Jennie is also meant to be crashing at Jihyo's with Nayeon, taking advantage of the offer to leave her lonely apartment, she hangs around with them outside while waiting for their ride to arrive. Then, Jihyo turns to her and tells her to enjoy the rest of the night with Chaeyoung, that she's free to come to her apartment at any time.

"It's not even midnight," Jihyo shivers as a cold breeze sweeps past them. "I don't want to spoil your fun. Go enjoy yourself, Jen."

Jennie hesitates at first, arguing that she doesn't want to put a dampener on Jihyo's night either which only makes the girl laugh, telling her that the night wasn't hers to enjoy anyway- she only made an effort for Nayeon. That is yet another thing Jennie loves about Jihyo; her unwavering loyalty and dedication to those she loves.

Jennie and Sana head back inside once they see Jihyo and Nayeon into the car. No doubt Jeongyeon will be looking for her but she will have to cope. It's Nayeon's fault she ruined her one chance with Jeongyeon anyway.

It isn't hard to find Chaeyoung on the dance floor, mainly because she is surrounded like a swarm of boys who descended upon her as soon as Jennie wasn't there. The older girl hangs back on the edge of the dance floor, suddenly feeling her heart go heavy. She should have expected this; Chaeyoung is too attractive and too new for people not to take notice of her. She had just hoped that maybe Chaeyoung would tell them she wasn't interested on account of the fact of Jennie...

The older girl is turning around to head to the bar when she hears her name being called. Snapping her head around hopefully, relief overwhelms her when she sees Chaeyoung waving her over with a smile.

Perhaps there is hope for them after all.

"Was Nayeon okay?" she asks, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Yeah, we just had to get her into the Uber," Jennie shakes her head. "Jihyo isn't very happy with her."

"Neither is Jeongyeon. She's going up the wall looking for her."

"I'm sure they'll talk it out when they're both sober," jokes Jennie. Though, she herself is starting to feel a little dizzy. Her judgement is skewed. Would it be a good time to kiss Chaeyoung right now?

Upon Jennie's arrival, the boys grumble and melt back into the crowd. Jennie doesn't know what she's heard about her and Chaeyoung's relationship- whatever it is, she's grateful. If it means she can have Chaeyoung all for herself, she doesn't care what they think of her.

They dance again for a while, occasionally going back to bar at sporadic intervals. Jennie paces herself but Chaeyoung is less strict with herself; she's here to enjoy it so she might as well drink, right?

When the clock strikes one am, Jeongyeon comes to seek out Chaeyoung. She tells her they're heading back to her apartment now since the club is closing soon. Chaeyoung, who is meant to be staying over too, can only flounder helplessly because she wants to spend the rest of the night by Jennie's side. Truthfully, there is a small part of her that is waiting for Jennie to invite her back to her apartment so they don't have to say goodbye so soon. However, oblivious as always Jennie says she will head home too- or head to Jihyo's which is where she is spending the night. Oh. Well, that makes sense to Chaeyoung. At least she has an excuse not to invite her round. Would Chaeyoung even have been brave enough to accept? There's no point dwelling on it now. 

By now, it is freezing cold outside. The girls stand shivering and huddled together like a flock of penguins, Seungwan encased in the middle because her girlfriend pushed her forward. Her and Joohyun are heading back to their shared apartment but because it isn't far away, they're sharing a cab with the girls heading over to Jeongyeon's. Jennie is going solo, but she assures them she will be safe when they offer her a ride with them.

Jennie's Uber arrives first, much to Chaeyoung's disappointment. She isn't ready to say goodbye yet. However, Jennie looks dead on her feet so the younger girl realises she cannot be too selfish. They hug goodbye, telling each other what a great time they had and how they'll speak soon. Chaeyoung watches Jennie's car disappear into the distance and round the corner, feeling a tug at her heart.

"Just so you know," Sana turns to her. "I am _so_ emotionally invested in your relationship."

"It's my lifelong goal to get you two together," Joohyun agrees. "You make her so happy, Chaeyoung."

These words do a better job at making Chaeyoung's head spin more than the alcohol did. The liquor has long since warn off but she still reels at Joohyun's words. If one of Jennie's best friends is saying it, then there has to be some modicum of truth. Or is she simply feigning it to preserve Chaeyoung's feelings? It's incredibly harsh to get her hopes up like this.

"You should ask her on a date next week," Dahyun says, leaning against Sana for warmth. Instinctively, the blonde girl's arms wrap protectively around her waist and pull her in closer. Even though both of them claimed to be only friends, they seem a lot more than that. From an outsider's perspective, at least. Nobody else bats an eyelid at this. Perhaps this is the norm for them. Chaeyoung imagines holding Jennie like this and cannot help turning red, her heart aching with yearning.

The Uber drops Seungwan and Joohyun off first. They wave goodbye until they are in the lobby of their building and then they head to Jeongyeon's. Chaeyoung's feet are in agony from being in heels all night and she wants nothing more than to fall into bed and sleep off the alcohol. She knows she won't feel brilliant in the morning, but that is just the price they have to pay.

Jeongyeon has only one bedroom, and Sooyoung already called dibs on sharing her bed. So Dahyun, Sana and Chaeyoung have been banished into the living room. There is a bed made up on the couch and an explosion of blankets and sleeping bags on the floor. Dahyun and Sana take the bags and Chaeyoung occupies the sofa. However, they don't get into bed straight away. Jeongyeon makes them all cheese toasties and cracks open some cans of beer. Chaeyoung despises it, so takes the food and turns down the alcohol.

"Are you going to tell us what happened with Nayeon?" Sana asks Jeongyeon, picking off a string of melted cheese and dangling it into her mouth. Sooyoung nudges her with her foot for being gross.

"We kissed," Jeongyeon shrugs, which makes all the girls rear up and shriek in shock. Jeongyeon has to hiss at them all to be quiet or else the other tenants in the building will be complaining about the noise.

"When?" Dahyun gasps.

"I can't even remember. One minute we were just talking and the next... we were kissing. But she leaned in first. That's a good sign, right?" Jeongyeon suddenly sounds anxious.

"Yes!" Dahyun shakes her shoulders, like she's trying to force some sense into her. "Are you going to ask her about it?"

"I don't know... maybe? I might call her on Monday, when she's not hungover."

Chaeyoung nibbles at the crust of her toastie, letting the other girls conversation wash over her. Just to feel involved is enough for her. She's not used to this kind of sleepover atmosphere, so she's just happy to be here. She always thought she was missing out in high school when the other girls would talk about their sleepovers and how they would stay up until dawn gossiping and whispering about their crushes. Apparently, girls do not grow out of this stage. Or, at least Chaeyoung's friends haven't.

At four am, Jeongyeon and Sooyoung disperse to bed and Chaeyoung falls back onto the sofa. her face feels raw and bare from taking off her makeup, her eyes dangerously heavy. She could sleep for an eternity if her body let her, yet her mind is racing by replaying all the events of the night over and over. It's getting light outside by the time she eventually manages to drop off, Jennie's face swimming in the dark behind her eyelids.

***

When Jennie returns to Jihyo's apartment, she is sat in her armchair sipping tea and watching television at a low volume. Nayeon is sprawled out on the couch, her limbs akimbo and snoring loudly. Jennie bends right down in front of her face, giggling. She looks like a broken puppet.

"Don't worry, I've already taken plenty photos of her," Jihyo smirks. Jennie flops down beside her in the armchair, curling up on the arm. "So, how was it?"

"Good," she shrugs. "Overall I think it was a success." They exchange a quick high five, congratulating their joint effort at pulling off such a good birthday party. Jihyo jokes they should quit their jobs and become professional party planners, making Jennie giggle so much she almost wakes Nayeon up. However, the birthday girl just grunts and rolls over, oblivious to what is going on around her.

"We should get to bed, I'm exhausted," Jihyo knuckles her eyes. Jennie notices her face is bare and her bob is messy, like she has been running her hands through it.

"You didn't have to stay up for me," Jennie tells her, trailing into the bedroom behind her.

"I know, but what kind of friend would I be if I didn't?" she asks rhetorically, pulling on her fuzzy pyjama pants. Jennie goes into her bathroom to get ready for bed, by the time she returns Jihyo is already curled up in bed, mere minutes away from falling asleep.

Quietly, Jennie tries to slip into bed beside her as unobtrusively as possible. She lays with her hands laced on her stomach, staring up at the ceiling in the dark. She knows she won't sleep for ages yet, not when her mind is abuzz like this.

"There's gonna be hell to pay in the morning," Jihyo remarks, making Jennie jump. She hadn't realised she was still awake.

"Let's just try and sleep," mumbles Jennie, rolling on her side and snuggling closer to Jihyo. "Do you think we can escape before she wakes up?"

Amazingly, Jennie manages to fall asleep soon after.

***

The smell of bacon is what jerks Chaeyoung awake. Her stomach is rumbling before she even has chance to open her eyes. With a groan, she rolls over and forces herself to sit upright even though her head is thumping painfully. Blinking a few times, she can make out a lump in the blankets on the floor which must mean Sana and Dahyun are still asleep.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty!" Jeongyeon calls from the open kitchen. Chaeyoung turns her head to see Jeongyeon stood at the stove frying bacon while Sooyoung is buttering toast. Both of them look worse for wear; their hair hair knotted, remnants of last nights makeup streaked on their faces, red rings around their eyes. However, both of them seem chipper enough. Chaeyoung throws the blanket back, gives herself a moment to stop the dizziness and pads over into the kitchen to see if there's anything she can do to help.

"Good morning," yawns Chaeyoung, rubbing her eyes in an attempt to bring some focus back into her sleep-blurred vision. "Do you need any help?"

"You can make the orange juice," Jeongyeon turns away from her pan for a split second, pointing to the fridge. At first Chaeyoung is confused as to what she means before she spots a shiny juicer on the cluttered kitchen counter. She refrains from rolling her eyes. Clearly Jeongyeon is as obsessed with cooking at home as she is with the bakery. Really, it's no wonder she opened such an establishment. When she said it was her favourite thing to do in the world, she wasn't lying.

Chaeyoung has never made fresh orange juice before and is confused at first, staring at the buttons on the juicer. They might as well be in a foreign language for all she understands them. When she presses a button a loud roaring noise comes from it, causing her to jump back and gasp in shock. Jeongyeon shouts instructions over her shoulder, eyes swivelling around in the kitchen, obviously very frazzled. She has now begun to fry some eggs while Sooyoung is putting batter into a waffle iron.

"Is breakfast always such a big deal?" inquires Chaeyoung, curious as to whether her boss goes through this much effort before work on a morning when it's just her in the apartment.

"God, no," the older girl scoffs. "I only have coffee for breakfast usually. But when people stay over it's always a given I make them breakfast."

"I get roped in too, apparently," Sooyoung mutters.

Once she gets the hang of the juicer, Chaeyoung puts three oranges in and watches in fascination as they turn into liquid. She has never had fresh fruit juice before, her culinary experience only stretches as far as Tropicana so this will certainly be an experience. She will have to stay round at Jeongyeon's more often.

When breakfast ready, Sooyoung serves it out onto the table that Chaeyoung helped set out. Seeing five place mats and sets of cutlery almost makes them feel like a family sitting down to breakfast. Chaeyoung supposes they are, in a weird way. These girls already feel like a family to her. She's closer to them than she ever has been with any other friends she has ever had- admittedly, this is not an extensive list. She feels happy. She feels content.

"Go and wake dumb and dumber up," instructs Jeongyeon. "They'll be awake in seconds if you tell them there's food."

Cautiously, Chaeyoung steps over their sleeping bodies to gently shake their shoulders. Dahyun remains fast asleep while Sana's eyes flutter in confusion. Chaeyoung envies her ability to look breathtaking even though she has just woken up.

"Breakfast is ready," she whispers, making Sana's eyes widen in realisation. Much to Chaeyoung's surprise, Dahyun rears up so suddenly it makes Chaeyoung topple on her butt. Dahyun flashes her a winning smile even though a nanosecond ago she was dead to the world. Jeongyeon was right.

The girls scrabble to their places at the table and begin tucking into their plates, not one of them complains about being hungover. It will hit them much later, when they have properly had time to come round. Chaeyoung is surprised how much better she feels but this is why hangovers are so deadly- they lull you into a false sense of security and then hit you hardest when you're least expecting it.

"So," Sana begins, around a mouthful of egg. "Was I blackout drunk last night or did I really hear you say you kissed Nayeon?"

Jeongyeon sighs, running a hand over her face. "I did. Now I regret it."

"Why?"

"Because... we were drunk. It didn't mean anything. I guarantee she won't even remember it."

"You don't know that," Sana hedges. "Maybe it was better you were both drunk or else you wouldn't have had the courage to do it otherwise. If you can talk to her about it..."

"I'm not mentioning it to her for as long as I live," deadpans Jeongyeon.

"Why?" Sooyoung demands. "There's nothing to be ashamed of. She was the one who passed out in the middle of her speech." The girls snicker at the memory. Those who remember it, anyway.

"I know but I've liked her for so long I feel like I've ruined it. I mean, she's Nayeon!" Jeongyeon runs a hand through her choppy hair. "I couldn't sleep at all thinking about it."

"Is that why you were awake at-" Chaeyoung's eyes flicker up to the clock on the wall, "-eight am?"

"Apparently why I was too," Sooyoung says sardonically.

Dahyun leans across the table and pats Jeongyeon's hand sympathetically. She is not good with words so shows her support through physical affection. Chaeyoung sits back and lets the scene wash over her, happy to take the backseat. Truthfully, she feels like intervening would be the wrong thing. Even though she loves these girls, she feels it isn't her place to give them advice or get involved. They have been friends much longer than Chaeyoung has known them, they're allowed to talk about this.

While she listens, Chaeyoung wonders what Jennie is up to. Probably asleep, like any sane person would be. It is only because of Jeongyeon all the girls are awake so early. Apparently their boss has to bake when she gets stressed which is why she made them such an extravagant breakfast- to take her mind off the kiss. Chaeyoung cannot see the big deal. Though, she can hardly put her two cents in when she was too cowardly to kiss Jennie last night. It so easily could have been her in Jeongyeon's position; stressing out about the consequences of kissing the girl she has a crush on. It could be her about tearing her hair out with worry. Fortunately, it is not. Because Chaeyoung plays it safe. While often times she would like to act on an impulse, she always reels herself in at the last minute.

Although it's agonising, it's safe. This is all that matters to Chaeyoung. She does not have to eat herself up inside with worry, she does not have to second-guess her every move (although she does regardless) because her actions are innocuous. If Jennie feels so strongly about her, she will have to make the first move.

***

Jennie is rudely jerked awake by something large jumping on top of her, effectively knocking all the breath out of her lungs. With a broken gasp, Jennie tries to sit up but is weighed down by something heavy on her chest. It's impossible to see what it is in the dark. Has someone broken into Jihyo's apartment? Are they about to murder her?

Then, the weight on her body groans and she immediately recognises what- or _who_ \- it is.

"Get off me, you lump," she shoves Nayeon off roughly. "I was hoping you wouldn't wake up until next week."

"I feel like death," the girl groans dramatically, pressing the back of her hand to her forehead and swooning into the bed. Coincidentally, she lands right in the middle of Jennie and Jihyo while also taking up the most space. "Why the hell did you let me drink so much?"

"I think Jihyo tried to stop you," Jennie points out. "Do you remember anything?"

Nayeon purses her lips, then shakes her head. "Why?" She suddenly sounds panic-stricken. "It wasn't bad, was it?"

Jennie simply snickers, laying back down in bed and rolling over. Nayeon sits up quickly, making the world spin aggressively on its axis as she swallows down vomit, roughly shaking Jennie's shoulder to try and rouse her. Amazingly Jihyo has managed to remain asleep during this exchange, though it would take a nuclear detonation to wake the girl up.

"Jen, what was it?" Nayeon whines. "Please tell me or I'll vomit all over you."

"Maybe you should have thought about that before your fat ass jumped on me and almost smothered me!"

"Okay, okay, point taken," she rolls her eyes irritably, not caring that she almost punctured Jennie's lungs. "Just tell me."

"You passed out in the middle of your speech."

Nayeon sighs. "Okay. I'll live that down. It isn't too bad."

"You did body shots off Taemin."

"Again, that's liveable."

"And you kissed Jeongyeon," comes Jihyo's sleepy mumble.

Nayeon freezes, her face paling considerably (although she looked sallow to begin with.) Even this catches Jennie's attention.

"I did _what_?!" she shrieks, grabbing onto Jihyo so roughly her nails leave indentations in her bare arm. "Why would you let me do that?"

Jihyo rolls over, propping herself up on her elbows with her eyes narrowed harshly in Nayeon's direction. " _I_ tried to stop you doing stupid shit all night but you wouldn't listen! Oh, and when you passed out everyone could see your underwear."

Nayeon falls back onto the bed, dread washing over her, staring up at the ceiling hopelessly. "Well, that's it. I'll just have to kill myself. Actually I'll kill you two first _then_ kill myself. Jihyo do you still have those painkillers from when you hurt your neck?"

"Stop being dramatic," her friend snaps. "It's your own fault. I try and better try to take care of you, Nayeon, but you constantly throw it back in my face. One day I'm just going to stop bothering." With an irritated huff, she turns around and goes back to sleep. Jennie and Nayeon exchange a wide-eyed, unsure glance. Usually Jihyo's patience is limitless. Particularly where her best friend is concerned. It could be the possibility that they have caught her so early in the morning, but even so...

"Jihyo?" Nayeon asks nervously. "You're not actually mad at me are you?"

"I can't hear you when I'm mad."

Nayeon presses her face into the crook of Jihyo's neck to soften her up. "I'm really sorry. I know it wasn't your fault and I appreciate everything you do for me. You know that, right?"

Eventually, Jihyo rolls over to face her. Her eyes are still hard yet the corners of her lips are just twitching a fraction.

"Don't be a suck up, it makes me want to puke. So does your horrible morning breath."

But then they hug and Nayeon burrows under the covers and spoons into her. So that's that. Their argument was short-lived, but they always are. Despite herself, Jennie finds a smile creeping onto her face that is soon wiped off when she imagines Chaeyoung being pressed against her back so tightly. Suddenly filled with embarrassment and flushed, Jennie pulls the duvet over her head and pretends to be asleep until the other girls rouse too.


	4. four

Chaeyoung falls into a routine. On the mornings she is not at work, she goes to the subway station to busk. By now she has accumulated quite the following, businessmen and women who have become accustomed to her presence and take a few moments out of their busy schedules to listen to her. They always give her hearty applause and toss her a few coins and crumpled up notes. Sometimes they will stop and talk to her once her set is over, meaning she becomes well acquainted with some of them. However, none of them hold a special place in her heart like Jennie does. The older girl often tries to find time to watch her busking, but Chaeyoung would not expect her to with how demanding her job is. Though, when she does come, it makes Chaeyoung's day and cannot stop smiling for hours afterwards.

Jennie slowly becomes busier with work, telling Chaeyoung that she thinks she is finally starting to make headway with this tough case that has been plaguing her for weeks. Chaeyoung would not begrudge her this, so does not expect any lunch dates or for Jennie to make extra effort with her. Though, this couldn't be far from the truth. Jennie still invites her for lunch dates, yet they become more sporadic. Chaeyoung doesn't mind. As long as Jennie is thinking about her, that's all that matters.

It's now October, marking Chaeyoung's first month in New York. Seungwan bakes her a cupcake and sticks a candle in it for celebration, and then everyone in the café applauds her when she blows it out. While she ducks her head and blushes, she is filled with the realisation she wishes Jennie were here too.

She feels this a lot.

After the fateful night of Nayeon's birthday party, the girl came into the bakery one afternoon after work with her tail between her legs and asked to speak to Jeongyeon privately. When their boss returned, her eyes were rimmed with red like she had been crying. although the girls didn't pry, they got the gist of what had been discussed. Nayeon clearly wasn't looking for the same thing Jeongyeon was. The girl brushed it off good-naturedly like the situation didn't bother her in the slightest, but there was a lingering sadness behind eyes that didn't disappear for days. Even after that, she still acted slightly droopy and forlorn. Chaeyoung asked Jennie what Nayeon had said, but apparently the girl had been completely secretive about it and hadn't divulged any information which was totally unlike her. Jeongyeon had clammed up too, so Chaeyoung took it as she would never know what happened.

She spends more time outside of work with her workmates, mainly Dahyun, Sana and Sooyoung because Jeongyeon is in too much of a slump to accompany them even though she fobs them off with pathetic excuses as to not own up to her sadness. Chaeyoung would like to offer her a shoulder to cry on, but in fear of being turned down because they are not close enough, she refrains. Even if the guilt does stir around hotly in her stomach.

In the interim, Chaeyoung becomes familiarised with Yerim; Sooyoung's roommate. She is chatty, amicable and just slightly too cheeky but somehow gets away with it. Chaeyoung likes her a lot. Apparently Sooyoung does too. When Sana observed how the two girls were slightly in love with one another, she hit the nail on the head. They are a perfect match, they just don't realise it yet. Every time they giggle or fall into each other's sides, Chaeyoung and Sana exchange knowing glances and roll their eyes. It's sickly and yet leaves a slightly bittersweet aftertaste in Chaeyoung's mouth.

That could be her and Jennie if she would just let herself fall.

At first, Chaeyoung worries that Jennie is avoiding her because of what happened at Nayeon's party. Obviously Chaeyoung wasn't the only one who felt the electrifying sparks between them, and she feared Jennie had become scared. However, Seungwan reassures her that Joohyun spends most days and nearly all night in the office so she really is at work. This puts her mind at ease, if only slightly. Because once Jennie's schedule frees up, they will at some point have to talk.

Or maybe not. Chaeyoung isn't brave enough and is happy to muddle along how they are for the time being- until she works up some courage.

It reminds her of a movie her and Alice used to watch when they were children, where each character in the movie requires something. Alice always said Chaeyoung needed the courage (and the brain when she was feeling particularly spiteful.) Though, looking back now, Chaeyoung completely agrees. If only it was as simple as getting handed the amount of courage she needs to confront Jennie.

One Saturday Chaeyoung is laying in bed because she isn't at work and Jennie is in the office-again- so she has no reason to get dressed and function like a normal human. She can't even bring herself to go busking. Besides, it's nice to spend some time in her apartment. The magic of her new home still hasn't worn off.

Just as she is aimlessly scrolling through social media, a call appears on her screen which makes her heart leap in surprise, before dread settles there instead. Biting her lip, she wonders if ignoring it will be the best option- to pretend she hasn't seen it and push it to the back of her mind. Then, bracing herself, she inhales deeply and presses the green circle. There is no getting out of this. If she continued to play dumb then the guilt would only eat her inside out. 

The familiar face fills the screen, wearing a sunny smile. Chaeyoung's heart squeezes painfully at the remembrance, an onslaught of homesickness washing over her.

"Hello, stranger," grins Chanyeol. "I was beginning to think you'd dropped off the face of the earth."

"Not quite, but nearly," she laughs. "Hey, Yeol."

He squints at the screen, bringing the camera slightly closer to his face. "What are you doing in bed on a Saturday? Shouldn't you be out exploring Rockerfeller or Times Square?"

"I've already been. And to Central Park too. It's amazing. I took some pictures so I'll send you them."

"So you've just remembered I existed?" He rolls his eyes. "That's a relief."

"Oh shut up," she slowly feels her confidence coming back. It's like nothing has changed between them. Truthfully, one of her biggest fears was drifting away from Chanyeol. She feels guilty that she had completely forgotten about him over the past month. Then she remembers the phone works both ways. "I've just been settling in. It's nothing personal."

"Your mom said you've been very sparse with details. Secretive, almost," he raises a questioning eyebrow like he can see right through her. Chaeyoung is stricken. Is that really what her family thinks? That she's hiding something from them? Although she has been quiet about the Jennie situation, she has been open and honest about everything else. How are they meant to know about Jennie anyway? This doesn't make any sense. "Alice was offended too. So what's really been happening? You can tell me."

"Nothing, honestly!" She protests. "I have no idea what they're talking about. I've told them everything and more!"

He hums, like he doesn't quite believe her but doesn't have enough evidence to keep drilling. "Come on then, tell me all about it."

So she does, right from the start; to walking on the plane in Melbourne up until the present moment. She tells him all about her apartment, all about Cornelia Street and how it's worlds away from Australia, all about her job and her newfound, ragtag bunch of friends.

Minus the Jennie situation.

"It sounds amazing," he nods when she has finally finished her spiel. "You're so lucky. I'm glad you've made friends, I was kind of worried you wouldn't. No offence," he adds quickly. "It's not that you're not likeable, but you can be awkward sometimes."

"Totally get it," she assures him. "I thought the same. Honestly, I think fate is really on my side at the moment. But I don't want to jinx it. Just because it's been going so well doesn't mean it will keep on." Suddenly, thoughts about Jennie never speaking to her again worm into her brain, like they have been ever since she started to go awol. She tries to maintain a brave face in front of Chanyeol, she doesn't want him poking around more than he already has.

"I spoke to your mom the other day and she said I should come over and see you. It old her I'd ask you first-"

"Are you kidding?" beams Chaeyoung, sitting up in excitement. "Yes! You totally have to come! You're gonna love it."

"Woah, steady," he chuckles. "It was only a suggestion. But if you want me to come then there's no harm in it. I'll probably wait until December-"

"So you can see Christmas," Chaeyoung says just as he is saying, "So I can see Christmas."

This causes them to crack up laughing. Even thousands of miles apart, they can read each others minds. It's all part of the strange, telepathic bond they have possessed since they were young. They're entirely too much like siblings.

"Okay then it's a deal. I'll come over near Christmas and then we can fly back to Melbourne." He doesn't miss her beat of hesitation. "What? What's wrong?"

"Nothing," says Chaeyoung, quickly. "I was just... well... I think I might spend Christmas here, that's all."

"Really? All on your own?"

"I won't be on my own. I have my friends and-" she gasps once she realises what she has let slip, slapping her hand across her mouth. Hopefully Chanyeol didn't notice it. But, as usual, he is annoyingly perceptive and he gets that glint in his eye that alerts Chaeyoung she is in for a rough time. Part of her considers just hanging up the call now.

"And who?" he presses, smirking slightly.

"No one. I-I didn't mean anything."

"Just tell me!"

"She's no one, honestly!" Then, Chaeyoung groans. "I've said too much, haven't I?"

"Absolutely. Now spill." 

Reluctantly, Chaeyoung hedges around the subject of Jennie. She is scant about certain details, especially their time together in the night club because she doesn't want Chanyeol calling her a wimp for not kissing her. And, some things Chaeyoung just wants to keep private because they are precious memories she will keep close to her heart for a lifetime. Even if nothing ever does come out of her and Jennie's friendship, she will always cherish her as her first friend in New York and her anchor in the difficult time. 

Although Chanyeol does not point it out, he doesn't miss the softness that takes over Chaeyoung's countenance when she reverently utters Jennie's name.

"Will I get to meet the lucky lady when I come over?"

"Hopefully," sighs Chaeyoung, sounding burdened. "Honestly, I don't know if we'll even be speaking by that time. Everyday I feel like I'm losing her because I'm too scared to make a move." She feels safe in pouring her heart out to Chanyeol. He would never judge her, even though he playfully teases, nor would he ever mock her. Besides, Chaeyoung can't keep her emotions bottled up about this forever. She doesn't want to bore her workmates with it anymore because she has exhausted the topic, so she needs a fresh set of ears and a new perspective.

"Why? What's the worst that could happen?"

In a small voice, Chaeyoung says, "I could lose her."

"Look, I don't know her but she seems into you. Why else would you two go on these lunch dates all the time? She wouldn't put this much effort in if she didn't care for you. Just ask one of your friends to see how she feels about you."

"But I feel like a baby!" She exclaims.

"You're acting like one!" He laughs. "Or, alternatively, just make the first move. If she rejects you, so what? It's a learning curve. There's millions of other people out there in New York. Just because you've latched onto the first person to be nice to you doesn't mean there wouldn't be other people you'd be interested in."

"Thanks a lot," she grouses. Although Chanyeol indeed has a point, she can't imagine sharing a bond with anyone else in New York like she does with Jennie. The older girl just gets her. While the other millions of people have been swept into New York and had all the uniqueness stamped out of them- Jennie hasn't. It's cliché to admit; but she's different. She's a beacon on the grey streets, a source of hope in the otherwise dreary city. She makes Chaeyoung's heart beat like it never has before and it's in this moment that, oh crap, she thinks she's really fallen for Jennie Kim. And there's no way out.

Yes there's eight million people in New York, but Chaeyoung only wants Jennie.

"I'm gonna go to bed because it's one am here, but just think about what I said," Chanyeol tells her. They exchange goodbyes and Chaeyoung puts the phone down, holding the device to her chest as she stares up at the ceiling in helplessness. While Chanyeol was spot on with his summary, there's something holding Chaeyoung back from reaching out for what she really wants. The deep-rooted terror of rejection and the knowledge Jennie doesn't feel the same, she supposes. She can almost feel the phantom sting of repudiation from Jennie and hear her saying:

"Look, I like you as a friend, Chaeyoung, but..."

Chaeyoung recoils as if she can actually hear Jennie, like the older girl has just whispered this right into the shell of her ear. She actually has to check around her bedroom to ensure Jennie hasn't snuck in and eavesdropped on their conversation.

If she was a bolder person, she would text Jennie now and tell her to be ready for seven pm because she's taking her on a date. That way Jennie would have no choice but to play along and get caught up in it. But chaeyoung won't do that, because that just isn't who she is.

Moving to New York was all about a fresh start- about making changes. It was a way for Chaeyoung to build her confidence up and remake herself into the woman she wished to be, who she saw herself becoming if she ever spread her wings and got away from the confines of Melbourne. However, all she's done thus far is remain her mousy, cautious self. She hates it.

Hates herself, more than anything.

***

The only thing that gets Jennie through the roughest patch of her whole career is constant updates from Chaeyoung. Even though Jennie rarely gets the opportunity to reply, the younger girl still keeps her up to date with what is going on in her life (albeit it's not a lot, but Jennie still appreciates the sentiment.) Her constant reassurance and presence gives Jennie the strength she needs to push through.

**Chaeyoung (10:30am): the cutest dog just came into the bakery. i think you would've liked it**

**Chaeyoung (11:45am): jeongyeon just burnt her fingers on the oven and is almost crying. we've now named it nayeon**

**Chaeyoung (12:55pm): i'm having egg salad for lunch. it's not very interesting but i thought i'd tell you anyway since i'm being annoying enough as it is. i miss our lunch dates**

**Chaeyoung (10:12pm): goodnight jen. please don't work too hard**

These are the only things that keep Jennie going. If she didn't have Chaeyoung by her metaphorical side, she reckons she would have crumbled under the pressure. She works on the theory that her court date is next week and if all goes well, then she will have as much free time as possible to spend with Chaeyoung once this is over so they can make up for lost time.

She doesn't want to dwell on the alternative.

Jennie finds solace in that this Fletchford case is not only ruining her social life, but everyone else's around her. Joohyun laments about being unable to spend time with Seungwan, Robbie despairs because his girlfriend is eight months pregnant and he wants to be with her at all times in case she is induced into an early labour. And Nayeon is surprisingly apathetic to it all. A few weeks ago, she would be whinging more than all of them combined. Nowadays she is subdued, only speaking when spoken to and sitting back and letting the other's take control. Jennie hasn't had time to question as to what is wrong, though Chaeyoung mentioned Jeongyeon was behaving in the same manner. Could their drunken kiss have really caused this much disruption? It's hard to believe, yet feasible. 

No matter. This is not something Jennie can focus on now, not when she is so close to cracking this case she can almost taste the long-awaited victory; can hear the judge banging down his gavel and giving the verdict. Jennie can't give up now, not when there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Her court date is at ten am on Thursday morning, where Mr Arnold and their defendant will be joining her. But the case is in Jennie's hand. The whole case lays with her; she controls the balance between innocent and guilty, holds the responsibility of persuading the jury and the overseeing judges. She's worked so hard on this. All signs point to her client's innocence. There is no way she can lose.

This is the mantra she repeats to herself as she shakily gets ready on Thursday morning. She has to postpone getting ready to vomit twice. This is normal, Jennie gets like this every time she has to face the courtroom. Even after years of experience, it's still terrifying. She reckons when she is even Mr Anold's age it will still intimidate her.

Before she leaves the house she checks her phone, a small smile cracking her face.

**Chaeyoung (7:59am): good luck today jen. i'm thinking about you and sending you all the best wishes**

***

After work, Chaeyoung doesn't head straight home. Instead, she takes two subways across Manhattan until she reaches the courthouse where she arranged to meet Jennie once she was done. Chaeyoung had no idea court was such a long, drawn out process. Apparently a court hearing can take hours, days even if you're unlucky and the jury are unable to reach a verdict straight away. 

Chaeyoung is filled with trepidation as she walks towards the large, imposing building. She's only ever seen it in Law and Order so to view it in the flesh is quite harrowing. She can't believe that Jennie is actually in there.

Truthfully, she's worried about when Jennie comes out. Multiple times she has stressed how difficult and impossible this case is, so what happens if she is unfortunate enough to have lost it? Will she lose her job? Will she be forced to take on another case straight away so Chaeyoung sees even less of her? As selfish as it sounds, the younger girl has been waiting for days to finally get Jennie back. She's left a huge absence in Chaeyoung's life while she's been away. Chaeyoung never wants them to be this far apart again. As pathetic as that may seem.

What if Jennie has lost and she's unconsolably upset? What if she doesn't speak to Chaeyoung? What if she brushes straight past her like she doesn't exist? No, not her Jennie. She wouldn't do that. Even if her feelings may not be romantic, Jennie cares a great deal about their friendship. She wouldn't just toss her to the side like that.

Would she?

Chaeyoung sits down heavily on the steps. Clearly they are not finished yet or she would have seen people milling around. She anxiously picks her nails until they bleed, each minute is agonisingly slow. She's sure she's been sat here for at least fifteen minutes, so where is she? As concerned as Chaeyoung is, there is no way she has enough nerve to storm right in there and try to find her. She'd rather be sat out here all night and left in the dark.

Just as she is about to call it a day, she hears clicking heels on concrete coming from behind her. Whirling around, she sees Jennie walking towards her. At first, her heart soars until she notices her sombre expression. Jennie doesn't even look up, her eyes trained on the steps in front of her. Chaeyoung stands awkwardly, her palms starting to sweat. How is she supposed to comfort Jennie now? What is she meant to say? This is much more raw than the last time she saw Jennie so vulnerable- Chaeyoung knows how much this meant to her, how much was at stake, how hard Jennie had worked for a successful outcome. Chaeyoung's heart bleeds with sympathy.

"Hey," she greets Jennie softly. "How did it go?"

Jennie looks up, eyes wide and lips turned down slightly at the edges. Chaeyoung waits on baited breath, her heartbeat getting faster after every second of silence.

Then, Jennie's face cracks out into a huge grin.

"I won!" She exclaims. "I won the case!"

Chaeyoung gasps. Without thinking, she grabs Jennie into a hug and whirls around happily. Jennie throws her arms around her, giggling breathlessly as the two become enveloped in their own world.

When she eventually puts her down, both girls are blushing, their eyes glittering with excitement.

"I can't believe you'd trick me like that!" exclaims Chaeyoung, swatting Jennie's arm. "I was about to cry I was so worried!"

"I'm sorry, Chaeyoung," Jennie pouts. Somehow, any trace of anger Chaeyoung may have felt (which, admittedly was a small amount to begin with) dissipates just like that. "I just wanted to keep you on your toes."

They begin descending the steps, so close their hands keep bumping. Occasionally they will lock eyes and look away with a giggle. Jennie is so elated in this moment she feels like... like she could kiss Chaeyoung on the spot. Though, the aftermath of scaring her like that would be too painful so she manages to restrain herself, even though she wants nothing more than to seize the moment.

"To celebrate, I want to take you out for dinner," says Chaeyoung boldly, her mind swimming too severely to think about the repercussions.

"Chaeyoung, you really don't have to-"

"But I want to."

They stop dead in the middle of the street, much to the annoyance of those around them. Neither of them notice, too focused on looking each other in the eye and maintaining contact.

"Okay," Jennie nods, fighting back a smile. "Saturday at seven?"

"It's a dea- date," Chaeyoung corrects herself, making Jennie's heart skip several beats. Unwittingly, this has become their saying. Whether it is really a date, they're not sure. It's just something they say every time they go out.

They shake on it.

***

"You finally asked her out?" gasps Dahyun, so loudly that a few customers crane their necks to see where the cause of the disturbance has come from. Chaeyoung hisses at her frantically, gesturing for her to lower her voice. It's embarrassing enough admitting this to one of her close friends, let alone everyone else in the bakery knowing.

"I-I think I did," stutters Chaeyoung. "I specified it was a date but then we always say that to each other-"

Suddenly, Dahyun grabs her by the shoulders and begins to shake her vigorously. Chaeyoung can feel her brain rattling around in her skull at the sudden assault, confused as to what is going on.

"That was to knock some sense into you!" Dahyun sounds exasperated. "Make sure she knows it's a date, if not you'll be stuck in the friend zone forever- and I've seen you two together, you need to start dating as soon as possible. It's painful to watch your puppy eyes at each other."

"I second that," Sooyoung appears from the kitchen, just on time to intervene. Tormenting Chaeyoung is one of her favourite past times, but Chaeyoung has soon come to discover it's all out of love. She teases her back- mainly about Yerim which is a sore point. For obvious reasons.

"I don't do puppy eyes!" Chaeyoung protests, indignantly. Then, she shrinks slightly. "Do I?"

***

By the time Saturday rolls around, Jennie is a nervous wreck. She barely slept on Friday night for tossing and turning, all sorts of thoughts plagued her. She tries to map every worst possible scenario so if she is faced with the worst then she will not be too surprised nor devastated. The most prevalent, troubling anxiety is that Chaeyoung stands her up- realising what a mistake she has made by offering to take her on a date. That is another thing; is it a date? Chaeyoung declared it so, yet it simply could have been a loose expression. Perhaps it was a slip of tongue- she didn't mean for it to be misconstrued. This thought makes Jennie's stomach stir hotly, fear already setting in.

Jennie wishes Jisoo was here and they could discuss it. Jisoo always knows the exact thing to say to soothe Jennie's nerves, she always has. Unfortunately, Jisoo is on the other side of the world in Tokyo at the moment so Jennie is well and truly on her own. She could call Lisa, but that would mean explaining the whole situation with her and no doubt would Lisa be hurt because she has not been kept in the loop. Jennie will eventually have to spill her guts, but she needs to see how tonight plays out first. If she believes it could continue going well, she will tell Lisa everything. 

Once again, Chaeyoung has been sparse with details about their date. She just told Jennie to meet her at the usual subway station and they will take it from there. All the information she divulged was to tell Jennie to dress formally. Because she does this for a living, that is not a hard feat. Truthfully, Jennie is looking forward to seeing Chaeyoung in a dress again. The other weekend at Nayeon's was not enough to sate her. Ever since then, she has been craving more of Chaeyoung every day. That night, she caught a glimpse of what it really could be like to let herself fall for Chaeyoung; electrifying, thrilling, heart-racing and a little terrifying.

Jennie thinks she's ready. Only if the younger girl is there to catch her.

Jennie stays in bed until noon, not letting herself get ready any earlier. She occupies her time by watching the same k-drama her and Jisoo began, she has become quite addicted to it by now. She wonders if Chaeyoung has a fondness for k-dramas considering she spent time in Seoul with her grandparents? It is certainly something to bring up tonight.

Surprisingly, Chaeyoung is one of the only people Jennie finds it easy talking to. Usually, she can become quite nervous when talking to people outside of her immediate circle (namely Jisoo, Lisa, Nayeon and Joohyun) but with Chaeyoung it's so... easy. Everything about being with Chaeyoung is easy; talking to her, spending time with her, watching her when she's unaware, and falling for her. It still doesn't seem real to Jennie that she found such an incredible girl one morning on the subway platform. If Jennie had been early that day, would she have still crossed paths with Chaeyoung? Probably. The way fate kept bringing them together makes Jennie hopeful that someone, somewhere, has a plan for them.

She sends her mom a quick text, telling her she's busy and can't talk. They will just have to catch up tomorrow. Jennie has far more important things to do this afternoon; like deep condition her hair and try this new Aztec clay mask Lisa recommended.

Several times throughout the day she wonders about getting in touch with Chaeyoung. Unlike Jennie, she's at work today, so Jennie doesn't want to bother her. Although Jeongyeon is more than accommodating with her staff, Jennie doesn't want to risk getting her into trouble. Not that she thinks Jeongyeon has it in her to tell anyone off at the moment, she's so droopy she can barely bring herself to come into work every day. Now Jennie is not as busy with work, she makes a mental reminder to drill Nayeon for as much detail as possible about their meeting.

On cue, Lisa calls her at three o clock and asks if she's available and if she wants to have a movie night. Jennie feels a twinge of guilt when she turns down the offer, realisation that she has not been bothering with Lisa a lot as of late washes over her. She promises the young girl she will devote her weekend to her next weekend now she has more spare time, to which the younger girl perks up about.

Lisa is like the little sister Jennie never had but always craved growing up. She needs to start treating her better. Then, the thought that Lisa and Chaeyoung would get along well strikes her, making her smile. If all goes well, she cannot wait to introduce Chaeyoung to her best friends. Jennie just knows they would love her. While they were pleasant to Amara, they didn't rate her. Jisoo was amicable with Jongin while Lisa did little to disguise her disdain; which wasn't fair on Jongin because it wasn't his fault Lisa doesn't believe any man is good enough for Jennie.

Jennie just hopes that things with Chaeyoung end up a lot better than anyone else she has ever fallen for.

Yet, somehow, she trusts Chaeyoung with her heart; even with the knowledge she could break it any moment.

While Jennie is applying her makeup and listening to music, a phone call disrupts her. Glancing down, she registers Nayeon's caller ID and dread begins to rise in her throat. Is she being called into the office for an emergency and will have to cancel her date with Chaeyoung? Is work worth breaking Chaeyoung's heart?

"Hello?"

"Hey, Jen," Nayeon sniffs, her voice thick as if she has been crying. Immediately, Jennie's skin begins to prick with fear. "Are you free? Do you want to come over?"

Jennie wants to scream with the injustice. Since when has she ever been so in demand by her friends?

"I can't, I'm really sorry," she bites her lip in guilt. "Why? Has something happened?"

"No. I'm just lonely..." This doesn't sound like Nayeon at all, which is why Jennie's protective instinct begins to kick in immediately.

"What happened? Is it... Jeongyeon?" She presses carefully, unsure of the reception she is going to receive at the mention of the girl Nayeon is currently pretending doesn't exist. 

"Yes. No. I don't know. I don't think I did the right thing."

"What do you mean?"

"I told her the kiss meant nothing, that I didn't want anything to do with her and now-" she sniffs, "-I realised that I do. Why do I ruin everything?" This sounds more like a rhetorical question Jennie can't answer, but she's going to try her best to reassure her friend.

"You were just scared," soothes Jennie. "Things happened too fast and you were drunk. I'm sure if you went back and apologised to her, she'd understand. Chaeyoung said she's been really upset too."

There's a small silence, before Nayeon's hopeful voice comes through the speaker,"Really?"

"Yes. Just talk to her. And if she doesn't want to make up, then at least you tried. But you'll never know what could happen if you don't speak to her."

Nayeon sighs. "I guess. Thanks, Jen. I'll just have to swallow my pride." She pauses. "Wait, how come you're not free? You never do anything on a weekend."

Jennie hesitates, wondering if it's tactful to bring up her date with Chaeyoung to a heartbroken Nayeon.

"I'm meeting Chaeyoung," she replies, carefully.

"Of course," grumbles Nayeon, yet there's no vitriol in her tone. "That's just the thing; Jeongyeon and I aren't like you and Chaeyoung. We don't look at each other like you two do, we don't act like you two do. I just think... that we aren't meant to be."

"Nayeon, come on," Jennie swallows, her friend's words bouncing around obtrusively in her mind. Is that really how their friends view her and Chaeyoung's relationship? This revelation is quite concerning. "Don't be like that. Opposites attract. And if they didn't, you two wouldn't have kissed in the first place."

"I guess," her friend sounds gloomy. "I'll let you go and get ready for your date. Have fun and tell me all about it. Just... spare me the mushy parts." Then hangs up.

Jennie sighs heftily, wishing there was more she could do for Nayeon. She now feels guilty for ever mentioning Chaeyoung whilst her friend is feeling so fragile. Still, there must be something Jennie can do. She knows Nayeon's pride will never stretch to speaking to Jeongyeon, she will just pretend the girl doesn't exist and hope her feelings fade away. Although Nayeon cannot see it, they are meant to be. There has to be a way to get them to reconcile.

Suddenly, it's like a lightbulb goes off in Jennie's mind. She's got it. but she's going to need Chaeyoung's help.

***

Chaeyoung hasn't written a song in a while. Truthfully, she has become so consumed with her new life in New York she hasn't given her songbook a second thought. It lays discarded in her bedside drawer collecting dust. However, on Saturday, she has a melody stuck in her head all day that she keeps humming around the apartment. There's no lyrics yet, just a few chords in her mind. Eventually, she has to get her songbook out and write the notes down before she forgets them- she will figure out the lyrics at a later date. Right now, she doesn't have time to sit down and begin writing a song because she has a date in two hours.

She sends Chanyeol a text to let him know the good news, no longer wanting to be out of contact with him. He sends her back a row of excited emojis and thumbs up, which makes her smile. She sends back a text calling him an old man before putting her phone on charge and going for a shower.

Whilst she is washing her hair, she wonders what Jennie is up to right now. Is she too, getting ready, or has she taken a more casual approach and is leaving it until last minute? Jennie is so cool and collected that Chaeyoung imagines she isn't getting as worked up as she is. Jennie probably isn't sat with knots in her stomach or over-thinking every scenario like Chaeyoung is. She's probably taking it all in her stride like she does with everything else life throws her way. Hopefully, her confidence will one day rub off on Chaeyoung. The younger girl hates the way she takes life so seriously, how she second guesses herself in every situation. By calming herself down, she tells herself that if Jennie didn't want to go on a date with her then she wouldn't have agreed. So far she has not rejected Chaeyoung. There is still time.

Chaeyoung tries to make an effort with her makeup, trying out some blue eyeshadow before growling in frustration and wiping it all off and trying again. The annoying thing about makeup is that it never goes the way you want when you need it to be perfect. She slumps against her bathroom counter; why is she bothering again?

Oh, right. Jennie.

Every so often she will check her phone to see if the girl has text her, only to be greeted with radio silence. Chaeyoung expected that, though. There's something private about getting ready for a date, you want to savour the excitement and build-up because it makes the date so much more worth it. You want to see your date and be completely surprised. That way, waiting for them all day suddenly becomes worth it.

The reservations Chaeyoung made are for a restaurant across West Village, a European place because she knows Jennie loves Paris. When she checked the menu online she saw they served French dishes and knew it was the perfect place. And, not out of her price range which is obviously a bonus. She wants tonight to go so perfectly it's driving her insane. Ideally, the night will end with her and Jennie sharing a goodbye kiss on her doorstep and their feelings for one another will become apparent. Jennie will tell Chaeyoung it's been her ever since they locked eyes on the subway platform and their romance will blossom from there.

Unfortunately Chaeyoung is living in the real world. As much as she aches for this to be the outcome, she is also realistic and knows it will not play out as she hopes. As long as Jennie leaves without hating her, then she will consider it a victory.

Before she leaves her apartment, she sees her friends have sent her a slew of texts in the group chat which makes her smile from ear to ear.

**Jeongyeon (6:24pm): good luck tonight chae!!**

**Sooyoung (6:24pm): what she said :)**

**Dahyun (6:26pm): tell us everything when you get back**

**Sana (6:27pm): remember... you're soulmates!!**

Jeongyeon's message probably means the most to Chaeyoung. She knows how down her boss has been lately, it must be hard for her seeing Chaeoyung and Jennie going on a date when things didn't turn out right with her and Nayeon. Chaeyoung feels guilty for flaunting it in front of her, knowing how raw her heart is at the current moment. Perhaps Chaeyoung will tell the other girls in private to show tact.

When the clock strikes six fifty pm, she grabs her purse to leave. She wants to be there in good time in case Jennie's train is early.

She locks the door behind her, swallowing down her fear and not looking back.

***

Six fifty seven pm.

Chaeyoung settles down on the familiar bench on the familiar platform, crossing her legs and smoothing out her skirt. Her foot taps against the concrete, ignoring the cold that makes her shiver in her denim jacket. It's October now which means Christmas is soon approaching, and Chaeyoung is yet to decide where she wants to spend the holiday season. In her old home or her new one. Which city feels more like home to Chaeyoung?

Honestly, it's New York. Without a doubt. Chaeyoung has just slotted in so well and adjusted into this city it feels like it's always been her home- that she's always lived here. Like she knows every street like the palm of her hand when, in reality, she barely knows the place at all. It's inexplainable. If she ever tried to explain to her family, they would only be heartbroken. So Chaeyoung doesn't have much choice but to return to Melbourne with Chanyeol, even if her heart yearns to be here.

After a few minutes, the train rolls into the station. Chaeyoung springs up, brushing the imaginary dust off her outfit and looking out for Jennie. While she doesn't want to seem too eager, she also wants to show politeness.

Damn it, she should have bought flowers.

Because Jennie is so small, it's hard to pick her out in the crowd. Despite the late hour, there is still a large stream of people exiting the train. Chaeyoung should not be so surprised. New York is the city that never sleeps or stops. There is no point of the day where it is quiet. This is something she learned very soon after she began living her. It's taken a while to adjust to it, but now, it's one of Chaeyoung's favourite things about New York. It is hard not to get swept away in all the hustle and bustle of the city. At the same time, it makes her feel alive. Like, for the first time in twenty-two years, she is truly living.

When she spots Jennie, this statement becomes even more true.

The girl, quite literally, takes Chaeyoung's breath away. She's wearing a white, satin shirt with a patterned, corset dress on top with glittering pins in her hair. Chaeyoung has to blink a few times to ensure the older girl isn't some beautiful vision she has conjured in her mind.

Meanwhile, Jennie is having trouble swallowing when she sees Chaeyoung. She's dressed in a white, floaty, strapless dress with a ruched chest. All she needs is a pair of angel wings clipped to her back and she would look like she fell straight from another, ethereal realm. Jennie's mind draws a blank as she tries to greet her, trying very hard not to look at her body and keep her eyes fixed to her even more beautiful and distracting face.

"Hnng," is the noise that comes out of Jennie's mouth. "I-I mean hi!"

"Hey," Chaeyoung quirks a shy smile. "You look... amazing. As always."

"Stop it!" Jennie whines, hiding her face with her hands to obscure the blush on her cheeks. "I was just about to compliment you but you took my breath away."

"Okay, you win," Chaeyoung laughs. She knows Jennie is joking, yet it still gets her heart fluttering. "That was so cheesy."

But true.

"I guess, but I had to one up you," Jennie forces a smile. "Are you going to tell me where we're going yet?"

"Nope. All I'm going to say is that we need to wait for the next train."

Jennie's interest is piqued as she quirks an eyebrow. "Wait, really? Okay, now I'm dying to know."

They sit back down on the bench and wait for five minutes, making light conversation to occupy themselves. There is a lot of nervous energy between them, hanging palpable in the air. Chaeyoung tries desperately hard to feign confidence, not wanting Jennie to pick up on her nerves and feel awkward herself.

Chaeyoung reckons this would be a lot easier if Jennie wasn't so pretty. Of course she had to fall for one of the prettiest girls in the city. This is just her typical luck. Honestly, it's a miracle Jennie agreed to accompany her at all. Unless it was out of pity- Jennie feels sorry for Chaeyoung because she's new to the city and alone.

Suddenly, it hits Chaeyoung like a slog in the gut. This must be the reason Jennie has been so welcoming and kind, because she feels sorry for her. Not because she wants to, but because she feels obliged to.

Her breath becomes strained as she tries to calm herself down, not looking in Jennie's direction in case she can sense her discomfort. What a way to start a first date, she thinks furiously to herself. Here she is panicking when she should be enjoying her time with Jennie, whether there are romantic undertones or not.

"Chaeyoung?" Jennie gently touches Chaeyoung's forearm, causing her skin to ignite immediately. "Are you okay? You look a little pale."

"Huh? Oh! I'm fine," Chaeyoung gently admonishes her concern with a smile. "Guess I'm just a little cold."

To her horror, Jennie begins shrugging off her blazer and drapes it over Chaeyoung's shoulders. Her heart is beating so fast she thinks it's going to burst out of the confines of her ribs. The gesture is so simple yet intimate it makes her chest constrict, barely able to even out her breathing. She meets Jennie's gaze and offers her a limp smile, unable to bring herself to do anything else under the circumstance.

"Come on," Jennie says softly. "The train is here."

Chaeyoung allows herself to be led across the platform even though she is the one who is supposed to be taking control- showing Jennie that she isn't completely pathetic and hopeless. However, as she sits down next to Jennie, so close their thighs are touching, her body simply turns to jelly.

Eventually, she manages to control her motor skills enough to hand Jennie back her blazer, fastidiously placing it back on her slim shoulders and straightening it out. When Jennie turns to her, looking questioningly with a cocked head, Chaeyoung finds the bravery to smile.

"It's freezing. You need it more than me."

Their hands brush together as they maintain contact for a few moments. As terrified as Jennie is, she refused to move. She needs Chaeyoung to know how she feels because she's too terrified to say it aloud in fear she doesn't reciprocate.

They sit in silence for a while, watching out of the windows. Chaeyoung has never been on a subway before, she's never needed to until now. She's fascinated, craning her neck and leaning forward with her whole body to get a better look. Jennie finds it utterly endearing as she tries to fight back a smile. She watches Chaeyoung with a soft expression, nodding appropriately whenever Chaeyoung turns to her in excitement. Jennie cannot count how many times she's ridden this subway, almost every day since she was nineteen years old. Yet, somehow, it feels like a brand new experience when sat next to Chaeyoung. She sits up a bit straighter, finally starting to pay attention herself. She begins to notice things she never has before; certain buildings, graffiti whizzing past in the tunnels. It feels refreshing. It feels exciting.

It feels like nothing Jennie has ever felt before.

As she steals a glance at Chaeyoung, Jennie comes to the mortifying decision that she has fallen for her much sooner than expected and much quicker than she was prepared for. It was not supposed to happen like this. It would happen after a few dates and as she was walking her home, she would be struck with the sudden realisation that she was indeed head over heels for Park Chaeyoung. It wasn't supposed to happen now, not like this. It's far too early. She isn't ready.

Jennie feels slightly overwhelmed and dizzy as she leans back in her seat, closing her eyes. Fortunately, Chaeyoung does not notice. The younger girl is too preoccupied in drinking in as much scenery as possible.

The train grinds to a halt after ten minutes and Chaeyoung stands up. Instinctively, she holds her hand out for Jennie and only does she realise her mistake when their palms make contact, setting her whole body on fire. Jennie offers her a gracious smile as Chaeyoung attempts to play it cool, like that was her plan all along.

Their grip is broken by a surge of people forcing their way out of the train. Momentarily do they lose each other in the crowd, Chaeyoung craning on her tiptoes to try and spot Jennie. The smaller girl comes scuttling up to her side, clinging onto her arm so they do not get separated again. This makes Chaeyoung feel slightly more at ease. It is less about intimacy and more about practicality.

"You're going to have to be patient with me," announces Chaeyoung as they climb the steps out of the station. "I think I know where we're going, but I may get lost."

"I'm used to it by now," teases Jennie, her now having fallen to her side. Although Chaeyoung would never admit it, she is disappointed Jennie is still not holding onto her. She's not brave enough to take Jennie's hand, so she will have to suffer in silence.

Surprisingly, they get there with ease and five minutes before their reservation. The hostess offers them a warm smile and leads them through the dimly-lit restaurant to their table. Jennie trails behind Chaeyoung, trying to get a hint of what kind of food they serve. So far, she has drawn up a blank. The interior is dark and minimalistic, giving her little clues. It's not until they sit down and drape their napkins over their laps does Chaeyoung finally tell her it's European.

"I know you like Paris," says Chaeyoung, immediately regretting it because it sounds so childish. "The nearest French place was really far away so-"

"It's perfect," Jennie cuts her off, meaning it sincerely. "Thank you so much, Chaeyoung. It means so much that you listen. You know me so well."

Her last sentence catches the younger girl off guard. All she can do is stare at Jennie with a weak smile, trying to catch her breath. It's pathetic how strong of a hold Jennie has over her. Nobody has ever made Chaeyoung so weak, been able to bring her to her knees with the simplest of sentiments. At first, Chaeyoung wanted to play it safe. Now, all she wants to do is fall. She's ready.

"So," Chaeyoung struggles, keeping her eyes trained on her menu to save embarrassment. "What are you ordering?"

"I was thinking we could share?" suggests Jennie. "I really want you to try the confit de canard. I think you'll love it."

Chaeyoung closes her menu with a smile, finally feeling courageous enough to meet Jennie's gaze. "Well, if that's what you want then I'm happy to agree."

Jennie gives her a triumphant sort of smile, which cannot be wiped off her visage even after the waiter has taken her order. She's fully aware she may look slightly demented or even borderline creepy by smiling so hard, yet she can't help it. She's just so glad to be sat here with Chaeyoung, feeling contented. It is akin to sinking further and further into a warm bubblebath.

"What have I missed in the world of Park Chaeyoung, then?" she prompts, realising that at some point she will have to tear her eyes away from Chaeyoung's pretty face and start a conversation. Though, she could spend all evening doing the former.

"Not a lot, I don't have a very exciting life," the younger girl chuckles. "Work. Busking. You know, the usual."

"Don't sell yourself short," frowns Jennie. "You're the most interesting person I've ever met."

Chaeyoung's heart does that thing again where it dips right into her stomach and dive bombs, bursting into a hoard of butterflies. Her brain feels like mush as she tries to think up of an adequate response to the girl who knows just what to say at all times.

"Yeah, right," she says, a little breathlessly. "You're way more interesting than me. I still need to hear all about your case."

Jennie launches into the details of her case in great detail. Chaeyoung finds it utterly endearing when she punctuates her points by gesticulating enthusiastically with her hands. The younger girl longs to reach across the table and kiss her softly in the candle light. As Jennie is talking, Chaeyoung watches her plump lips and listens intently to her soft voice; envisioning the kiss playing out like a scene in a movie. If she imagines hard enough, she can feel the tender brush of skin against her own lips. Instinctively, she reaches up to her mouth when she feels the ghost of Jennie's touch.

"But now it's over, I'm all yours," Jennie says. Then, her cheeks heat up. "I-I mean we can see each other more! I totally didn't mean-"

"I get it," Chaeyoung smiles reassuringly. She's glad that Jennie is taking this as seriously as her. It makes her believe they're on the same page.

"Chaeyoung?" Jennie says, suddenly serious. "Can I ask you something?"

The younger girl has difficulty swallowing, let alone getting her words out. "Sure." Her voice cracks ever so slightly. Hopefully Jennie doesn't notice.

"Is this a date?"

This inquiry floors her. This was the last thing she expected Jennie to ask her. She didn't expect her to be so bold. But, Chaeyoung supposes someone has to take the lead since she is too cautious. Jennie is business-like and no-nonsense, it is only natural of her to take control.

"Do you want it to be?"

The uncertain expression on Jennie'scountenance smoothes out, replaced by a timid smile. "I really do."

Chaeyoung smiles too. "Then it's a date."

And just like that, it all seems to slot into place. Every worry, every anxiety, every concern Chaeyoung had about Jennie not reciprocating her feelings dissipates. The tension leaves her shoulders as she leans back in her chair slightly, smiling wider and laughing slightly louder than she has all night. Jennie doesn't miss her newfound carefree demeanour and it makes her heart clench. She had no idea a simple question would mean so much to her, but now, she's glad she found the nerve to speak up. There was a small part of her holding back, not prepared for the possibility of Chaeyoung her down. But Jennie knows better than anyone that, sometimes, you just have to seize life in the moment or else you'll spend the rest of time lamenting all the lost moments you can never get back; plagued by thoughts of what you could have done and said differently.

They got onto the topic of friends, while they are digging into their starter- French onion soup.

"My friend Chanyeol called the other day," Chaeyoung remarks, conversationally. She likes talking to Jennie because she knows the older girl absorbs her every word. She focuses solely on Chaeyoung like she's the only person in the world who matters- Chaeyoung relishes in the feeling. Sometimes it's nice to feel wanted.

"Chanyeol?" Jennie cocks her head. She's never heard him mentioned before, so she's at a loss.

"He's probably my oldest friend, I've known him since I was a baby. A bit like you and Jisoo."

"Oh," Jennie tries to feign aplomb in her tone. "What did he want?"

"Just a catch up. I feel bad because I haven't been in touch with him since I left. But it felt like I never left. He said he wants to come over for Christmas which is really exciting."

"That's cool," Jennie nods diplomatically. "Have you arranged what you're doing for Christmas yet?"

Chaeyoung shrugs, spooning up some soup. "I've been giving it a lot of thought. I want to stay here, but I know I'll end up going back to Australia because of my family. I'm meant to be travelling back with Chanyeol which should make it a bit more bearable."

The words are on the tip of Jennie's tongue: there's always a spare place at my house if you want to spend Christmas with me. Yet, there's something stopping her declaration. Maybe it's because she's already bared herself to Chaeyoung enough to tonight. Jennie has only just safely gotten over the embarrassment of asking her if they were on a date. She may consider bringing up the offer another time if Christmas is ever mentioned again. Which, in the two month period until then, it probably will. Hopefully by that time, things will have altered between them. Hopefully, just hopefully, Jennie will have a reason to invite her to stay.

"What about you? What do you do for Christmas?"

"Not a lot," responds Jennie. "I never have. My dad has always been really busy over the holiday season. Sometimes it was just my mom and me. She usually comes over from Seoul, or if my dad can make the time we go over there. We go to the Arnold's house for Christmas, usually. When I was in boarding school I always tried everything I could to stay there; I always wanted a Harry Potter Christmas, you know?" Chaeyoung nods enthusiastically. Harry Potter is one of her and Jennie's shared passions. "I don't know. I guess I've never been a big Christmas fan. Maybe if things were different..." Her voice wains off, so Chaeyoung doesn't push it. Her heart bleeds for Jennie, she cannot imagine not wanting to spend Christmas with your family. Or not wanting to spend it at all.

"We can have our own Christmas before I leave!" Chaeyoung suddenly says, brightly. "You know how people do Friendsgiving? Well we can do that but with Christmas! Invite our friends round, exchange presents. I can cook a turkey. It'll be awesome!"

"Really?" gasps Jennie. This idea has totally blown her offer of spending Christmas with her out of the water. But Chaeyoung's idea sounds much more enjoyable. "That sounds amazing. We should totally do that!"

Tbe thought of Chaeyoung thinking so far into the future puts Jennie at ease.

They then launch into a discussion about their favourite Christmas movies; Jennie says _It's A Wonderful Life_ while Chaeyoung argues her case that _The Muppets: A Christmas Carol_ is a classic. However, they both end up agreeing on their love for _The Grinch_. Chaeyoung makes a note to get these movies on DVD so her and Jennie can watch them closer to the holiday season. The mental image of being curled up on her couch with Jennie underneath a fluffy blanket, sipping hot cocoa and eating gingerbread makes Chaeyoung feel warm and fuzzy inside.

Their main course comes and, Chaeyoung has to concede, Jennie has impeccable taste. It turns out the dish she ordered is duck, which Chaeyoung's isn't really familiar with. It's good. So good that she has a difficult time restraining herself to let Jennie eat her fair share of the meal. Jennie simply giggles, telling her to eat as much as she wants. Even with that offer, the younger girl doesn't listen. She would feel too guilty eating it all. That is not the proper etiquette for a date.

This reminder makes Chaeyoung try to wipe the silly smile off her face. Jennie pretends not to notice, but she does.

"Okay, so I need your help with something," Jennie says, suddenly. Chaeyoung looks up, her full attention on her. "I spoke to Nayeon before I came out and she's really down about the Jeongyeon thing."

"Yeah, Jeongyeon is really depressed too," Chaeyoung shakes her head. "She won't tell us anything about it."

"I told Nayeon to just talk to her, but I know she won't. She's too proud. So I need your help to try and get them together."

"I'm in, though I'm not sure how much help I can be."

"I was thinking we could trick them both into being at the same place and trapping them so they have no choice but to speak to each other." When Jennie sees Chaeyoung eyeing her warily, she protests, "I saw it in a movie once and it worked!"

"Okay, okay," holding her hands up in defeat, Chaeyoung laughs. "We'll do it your way. Where do you suggest we get them to meet?"

"Hm. I haven't thought that bit through. Maybe... Starbucks? Nayeon sometimes goes there after work."

"Sounds good. I'm sure I can persuade Jeongyeon to go there. And then what do we do?"

"We let them do the talking." Jennie wears such a triumphant smirk that Chaeyoung doesn't have the heart to tell her that the plan could go disastrously. Why spoil the illusion?

"When are we planning to do this?"

"I was thinking some time next week? Maybe Wednesday. We have an early finish on Wednesday because the office is under maintenance."

"Wednesday is perfect because I'm at work with Jeongyeon." Chaeyoung then giggles. "I feel like we're in some kind of spy movie; plotting and scheming." Jennie's heart almost explodes in endearment, feeling a rush of affection for the girl sat opposite her. Everything just feels so right.

"If this works then they're so gonna owe us," Jennie comments. "I'll never let Nayeon forget it."

"It will work," Chaeyoung nods with such certainty that Jennie cannot help but believe her. Not only about Nayeon and Jeongyeon; but about them too.

***

It is cold outside the restaurant, both girls stand beneath the canopy shivering. When Jennie suggests getting an Uber instead of riding the subway, Chaeyoung leaps at the opportunity. She is too tired and full of rich food to want to be chewing around on the train. All she wants to do is collapse into bed and go into a food coma.

"Next time I'm going to drive," Jennie shivers. "I'm sick of waiting for Ubers."

"M-me too," Chaeyoung agrees, her teeth chattering loudly. "If it's this cold at Christmas then I'm definitely going back to Melbourne."

"Not before we've been ice-skating in Times Square," protests Jennie. "And been to all the department stores to look at the decorations. Oh! And see the Winter Village at Byrant Park."

"For someone who doesn't really do Christmas, you sure sound like you enjoy it."

"I said I didn't do Christmas, that isn't to say I don't love New York itself," Jennie points out. Chaeyoung simply rolls her eyes, though she is not annoyed by being proved wrong. Somehow, it is just expected that Jennie is always right. On their second meet-up she told Chaeyoung she doesn't make mistakes- this has become apparent.

"We had a Christmas market in Melbourne that I went to every year," Chaeyoung sighs wistfully, reminiscing on all the years her and Alice spent there. They went religiously, even if their parents were unavailable they would take the bus to ensure they never missed it. "And a light show on the last day of November. We had a gingerbread village to but I only ever went to it once. Christmas never feels real back home because it's always so warm."

"Because it's summer there, right?"

"Yeah. Most people spend the day at the beach or going surfing. One Christmas my family had a barbecue on the beach. It's all I've ever known but somehow I felt like I was missing out on something." Chaeyoung frowns, Jennie wishes she could smooth out the knot in between her eyebrows. "I'll figure out something this year. Who knows, maybe I can convince Chanyeol to stay here too?"

"He can join in on our Christmas," Jennie supplies, causing Chaeyoung to beam. Although Jennie cannot fathom why, it means a lot to Chaeyoung that Jennie is already being accommodating and welcoming despite never meeting him. Jennie knows it's important to Chaeyoung therefore she must respect it.

Their car comes, and they set off to take Jennie home first. The backseat of the car is not particularly big, but Chaeyoung feels too far away from Jennie; not when they have been so close all night. Discreetly, she wiggles over slightly, closing up the distance. She plays it off coolly, yet Jennie notices. She ducks her head, hiding behind a curtain of hair and grins to herself.

"I had a lot of fun tonight, Chaeyoung," Jennie announces once she knows her apartment building is approaching. "Thanks for inviting me."

"The pleasure is all mine," the younger girl tells her, utterly sincere. "I hope we can do it again sometime."

"I owe you lunch next week and a proper date," winks Jennie, which just about makes her faint.

"You- you don't have to do that," she tells her desperately.

"I want to."

It's so simple. that is that, then.

There's no space to argue with Jennie Kim once she has set her mind onto something.

"Don't forget Wednesday," the younger girl warns.

"How could I? I think between us we'll make it work."

There's something heavier to her words that lingers unspoken in the air. Chaeyoung tries to ignore the pressure of it weighing down on her chest.

"Well, this is my stop," announces Jennie when the Uber stops outside of her apartment building. Because it is so dark, Chaeyoung cannot make out the building. Though she expects it to be very grandiose. That is the only type of place she can imagine Jennie living in. when she pictures someone as regal as Jennie standing in the middle of her apartment of Cornelia Street, it feels alien. Jennie would only silently scorn her for living in such a small, cozy place. While Jennie outwardly may not be a snob, she has certainly become accustomed to the finer things in life.

"Text me before you go to bed," requests Chaeyoung. Even saying it feels so intimate, yet right.

"I wouldn't dream of not." Jennie seems reluctant to get out of the car, like she has something else on the tip of her tongue. Chaeyoung leans forward expectantly, waiting on baited breath. are they going to kiss? Anything? Something?

"Goodnight," says Jennie, softly. For a moment, the air between them goes still and Chaeyoung's heart begins fluttering viciously. Is this finally it? Is she finally going to know what Jennie's lips feel like against her after all this time of wondering?

For a few seconds they maintain eye contact, before Jennie tucks a strand of hair behind Chaeyoung's ear and getting out of the car. She gives one last wave before the car drives away. Chaeyoung slumps into the leather upholstery, letting out a breath she didn't even realise she was holding in.

"I'm not gonna lie," the driver speaks up for the first time all night, catching her eye in the rearview mirror. "I thought you guys were gonna kiss."

"Really? Do you think I should have kissed her?"

"Honey, she was waiting for it."

***

Chaeyoung feels disheartened when she gets home. Deflated. she flops into bed and groans loudly into her pillow, letting her frustration seep out. The driver was right, she should have seized the moment and kissed Jennie. What nicer way could they have ended their first date?

As always, Chaeyoung remained a coward and missed yet another opportunity. She knows there will be more, because Jennie seems quite adamant she is here to stay. Still...

She takes off her makeup and slips into her big sleeping t-shirt, sliding into bed and checking her phone for the first time all night. Of course it has blown up since she left for her date. It is mainly her friends pestering her in the group chat, some of them make jokes about what her and Jennie could be doing which makes her face heat up. They haven't even managed to have their first kiss yet, let alone these obscene things her friends are suggesting.

**Chaeyoung (10:43pm): date was fine. back home now**

Immediately, her friends begin bombarding her for details but Chaeyoung doesn't have the strength to answer them. She will in the morning. If she manages to remember. While she had a wonderful night, she's still beating herself up for not taking action and kissing Jennie like she so wanted to.

Perhaps there is a small part of Chaeyoung that is subconsciously holding back because she is scared. While they are in a comfortable phase at the moment, things could spiral and become serious very quickly. Truthfully, Chaeyoung doesn't know if she is ready for serious. She has never had a proper girlfriend in her life. The thought, while exciting, is also extremely daunting. Jennie seems so much more experienced than her. Chaeyoung wouldn't even know what to do. At the minute, things are slow and steady which is what she is happy with. Does Chaeyoung really want things to get serious, or is she enjoying this phase with Jennie too much and she is not looking for anything more? It's all so confusing it makes her head spin. She doesn't want to think about it now, but it's all that haunts her as she tries to drift off to sleep. Jennie's face in the dark car, illuminated by the streetlights outside- the expectant look on her face as Chaeyoung leaned forward, the way she hurried out of the car when she realised she was going to get nowhere.

Chaeyoung feels like such a fool.

***

**Jisoo (10:55pm): how was the hot date?**

**Jennie (10:55pm): good. i couldn't classify it as 'hot' though**

**Jisoo (10:56pm): bummer :( no lip action at least?**

**Jennie (10:58pm): no :(**

**Jisoo (11:00pm): you can tell me all about it next week**

**Jennie sits bolt upright in bed, eyes wide.**

**Jennie (11:00pm): you're coming back?!!**

**Jisoo (11:01pm): yep, you have me all to yourself for two whole weeks**

**Jisoo (11:03pm): oh and btw, i better meet chaeyoung**


	5. five

Operation 2yeon, as Jennie has so wittily called it, is officially underway.

Miraculously, Chaeyoung manages to convince her boss to accompany her for a coffee at Starbucks once their shift has finished. Jeongyeon seems quite excited about it, considering she hasn't left the house in the past few weeks apart from going to work. It makes guilt seep deep into the pit of Chaeyoung's stomach; her boss is making an effort and here Chaeyoung is betraying her trust. When she voices this concern to Jennie, the older girl simply assures her it's for the greater good. When Jeongyeon and Nayeon are married with fifty cats, they will thank them for their deceit.

Jennie, on the other hand, has a much more difficult time convincing Nayeon to come with her. At first, her friend (who is too sharp for her own good) becomes increasingly suspicious; asking why is it only now she wants to go for a coffee when they never have before. Furtively, Jennie tells her that she's worried about her wellbeing and thinks it will do her good to get out of her apartment and merge with civilisation again.

At first, Nayeon drags her heels, flatly refusing. Jennie almost screams in frustration; very much wishing she could bash her friend's head against her desk to knock some sense into her. However, she keeps persevering. All day she wheedles in Nayeon's ear about going to Starbucks. Nayeon flatly refuses to take bait. Eventually, Jennie loses it and snaps that Nayeon is the most ungrateful person she's ever met, because Jennie organised a whole birthday party and rented out one of the busiest nightclubs in Manhattan for her- and she can't even join her for a coffee? At this, Nayeon blinks timidly and, at last, agrees to come with her. Even if it _is_ under duress.

**Jennie (12:17pm): it's done. she's finally agreed to come**

**Chaeyoung (12:22pm) mwahahaha**

Once Seungwan catches downwind of their after work coffee date, she brightly asks if she can tag along too, offering to bring Joohyun along as well. Chaeyoung blurts out that she can't come today, but another time. Seungwan's face crumples in hurt, yet she nods and doesn't really speak for the rest of the afternoon. She is yet another person Chaeyoung has to apologise to. Perhaps tonight she will text her tonight with an explanation for her rudeness. That's if she ever wants to speak to her again.

Chaeyoung doesn't have time to dwell on this, she's still trying to brainstorm ideas of how to keep Nayeon and Jeongyeon in the same building long enough for them to talk it out. She will use brute force if she has to, because by the sounds of it, Nayeon seems just as reluctant as Jeongyeon to face up to it. Jennie is right, one day the pair will thank them for the intrusion. For the foreseeable future, however, they will undoubtedly be ticked off.

When the day is over and the girls are hanging up their aprons and wiping down the work surfaces, Jeongyeon sidles up to Chaeyoung which causes her to jump. She has been on edge all day in case someone manages to see through her façade and catches onto what she is _really_ scheming.

"I was thinking; why don't we go out for dinner instead of coffee?" offers Jeongyeon brightly, wearing one of the brightest smiles Chaeyoung has seen on her visage in weeks. It physically pains the younger girl to know she has been plotting behind her back and is about to embark on a scenario that could break her heart even more. Chaeyoung wishes the ground could swallow her whole so she wouldn't have to continue living with the guilt. "My treat of course."

Chaeyoung chews on her lip, her mind racing to try and think of an adequate excuse. "I just really fancy getting a coffee today, Jeong. Plus I have loads of salad left for dinner." She pats her stomach, playing herself up. "Another time, though."

"Oh," her boss' shoulders slump slightly. "Okay. Coffee is still good, though."

Once the bakery has been cleaned, they grab their coats and purses, say goodbye to the other girls and begin setting off in the opposite direction to them. Chaeyoung links her arm with Jeongyeon, trying to make the situation seem more casual and to avoid suspicion. Jeongyeon laughs a little, telling her she will be the navigator because she knows how useless Chaeyoung is with directions. The younger girl gasps and feigns offence, but is glad Jeongyeon is taking the lead. When she checks her watch, her throat tightens when she sees it is five minutes before she planned to meet Jennie.

The idea is that Jennie and Nayeon will already be settled down at a table, then cue Chaeyoung and Jeongyeon's entrance. Chaeyoung will act surprised and delighted to see Jennie and drag Jeongyeon over whether she likes it or not. After that, it's all improvisation. Though, Chaeyoung has a few ideas of what to say already. Being as organised as she is, she bets Jennie will too. No doubt will the older girl take command of the situation. It seems Jennie is the only person Nayeon listens to.

Fortunately, Starbucks is so packed that Jeongyeon doesn't spot Nayeon and Jennie seated in the corner window seat. She's too busy digging in her purse to procure the right amount of change for a latte. She turns to Chaeyoung and asks what she wants, yet the younger girl is hardly paying attention- too preoccupied with thinking up a way of getting Jeongyeon over to them. There's no seats available, so walking right up isn't an option. Her heart is beating so fast she barely hears Jeongyeon. They have only been in here two minutes and already their plan has gone wrong.

**Jennie (3:35pm): the people on the table next to us are finishing their drinks. they should be gone by the time you've ordered**

Chaeyoung goes limp with relief. Her eyes swivel around and eventually meet Jennie's, where she gives the older girl a discreet thumbs up before turning her attention back to Jeongyeon. Meanwhile, at Jennie's table, Nayeon doesn't notice their interaction because she is too busy wistfully looking out of the window while sipping her iced coffee.

"I might go abroad," announces Nayeon. "Go and see my family. I've always wanted to go to Tokyo. Would you come with me?"

"Don't you think you're being a little prudent?" asks Jennie. "It's not like you've broken up with a long-term girlfriend or anything. It's just Jeongyeon."

Nayeon puffs up slightly. "It's not _just_ _Jeongyeon_. I really liked her, I just didn't realise until it was too late. Now she hates me."

Jennie represses a smirk. _Got you_.

If her and Chaeyoung play their cards right, this could go exactly according to plan.

"If you could tell her, would you?" probes Jennie.

"What?" Nayeon wrinkles her nose up. "I mean... maybe? I don't know because I won't get the chance to tell her."

Jennie almost squeals. It feels like something out of a romance film. Except, her and Chaeyoung aren't the main characters; Jeongyeon and Nayeon are. Chaeyoung and Jennie are simply the background couple- the pair that the audiences wishes would get together and are rooting for the entire movie, perhaps more than the main characters.

Across the coffeeshop, Chaeyoung and Jeongyeon have just purchased their drinks and are looking for a place to sit. Chaeoyung grabs her friend's hand and begins tugging her over in the direction of Jennie and Nayeon, who have not yet spotted them. Something must really have garnered Nayeon's attention outside because she has been staring out of the window the whole time they've been here. Chaeyoung feels sympathy for Jennie who has had to put up with her friend's dreary mood for this long.

Hopefully that should all change soon.

They get a few feet away from Jennie's table when Nayeon suddenly decides to whip her head around, accidentally making eye contact with a frozen Jeongyeon. This isn't how it was supposed to happen! Chaeyoung begins panicking, desperately looking over at Jennie who's eyes are slightly wider than usual; the cogs turning furiously in her mind.

"What the hell is this?" Nayeon demands, brown eyes flickering between the two culprits. She tries her upmost best not to look in Jeongyeon's direction, where the bespectacled girl has turned a funny shade of green and her vision has begun greying out.

"Can we not get coffee?" asks Chaeyoung. "I saw the table here was free and..."

"Bullshit!" argues Nayeon. "You set this up!" She turns to Jennie, eyes ablaze. "Why would you do this?"

"You said yourself you would apologise to Jeong if you got the chance and now she's here! You two haven't been yourselves for weeks and we know it's because of the kiss." Jeongyeon lets out a strangled noise of protest. "Look, I don't know what was said between you two, all I know is that you made the wrong choice to call things off before you'd even given it a chance. You both care for each other a lot, so why not go for it?"

Jennie's speech is so passionate because she is subconsciously thinking of her own situation with Chaeyoung, hoping some of her words absorb into the younger girl's mind too.

Jeongyeon turns to Chaeyoung, hurt evident on her countenance. Chaeyoung wants to cry at how broken her voice sounds. "This was a set up the whole time?"

"Jeong," Chaeyoung's eyes are wide and pleading. "We thought it was for your own good. I've seen how sad you've been, how you're not yourself. You tried to pretend everything was okay but I knew it wasn't. I thought... if you just talked to Nayeon..."

For a moment, silence settles upon them. Chaeyoung and Jennie exchange a subtle glance, anxiously awaiting their friend's reactions. Jeongyeon seems fit to pass out at any moment and Nayeon looks murderous, like she can't decide who she wants to kill first. It's so tense and uncertain until-

"Fine," Nayeon huffs. " _Fine_. Since you two have gone to _so_ much trouble, I'll stay." Her gaze flickers up to Jeongyeon. "Will you join me?"

Jeongyeon freezes, unable to speak. It's been so long since she's spoken to Nayeon she doesn't know how to react at being addressed to directly. When Chaeyoung nudges her in the ribs gently, she nods.

"Okay. I-I'll stay."

Jennie stands up graciously, giving Jeongyeon a small nod as she steps by her, allowing the girl to take her seat. Chaeyoung smiles encouragingly at her friend while Nayeon remains stony-faced, glaring at them until they exit the coffeeshop.

Outside, Jennie and Chaeyoung squeal triumphantly, high-fiving and then bringing one another into a hug. They're breathless when they pull away, searching one another's eyes for an infinitesimal moment before ducking their heads away shyly.

Nayeon scoffs as she watches she scene unfold out of the window. "Idiots," she declares scornfully. "And they think _we_ need guidance on getting together."

"We could always get back at them and do the same," jokes Jeongyeon lamely. She is still trying to wrap her head around the situation. When Nayeon rejected her all those weeks ago, she never expected to speak to the girl again- let alone discover that Nayeon felt the same way about her but was too scared to act upon her feelings.

"I'm sorry that you have to be here," Nayeon says, directly. Unabashed. "I understand that you hate me for what I said. I wouldn't blame you if you walked out right now."

Jeongyeon shakes her head. "I could never hate you. besides, I don't want to walk out. Maybe they were right, maybe we _should_ talk."

Nayeon eyes her carefully, before a timid smile creeps upon her face. "I'm going to get another drink. Do you want anything?"

"I'm good."

"Make sure you're still here when I get back," she jokes, standing up gracefully and striding over to the counter, feeling more unburdened than she has in a while.

Meanwhile, Chaeyoung and Jennie are walking down the street. They're not holding hands, but they walk so close together their knuckles keep brushing together. Each time they do, little zaps of electricity spark on their skin, palpable and unmistakable, but they determinedly ignore it to save embarrassment.

"Playing matchmaker has made me really hungry. Shall we get something to eat?" Chaeyoung asks.

"Sure. There's a fast food place around here somewhere. I'm kind of craving fried chicken."

Chaeyoung courteously waves her arm in front of her. "After you, my lady."

Much unlike their usual dinner dates, the pair end up in a greasy fast-food joint. Jennie looks humorously out of place, nibbling at her chicken tenders gracefully and sipping her Coke, looking around with wide earnest eyes. Chaeyoung has to keep looking away to ensure Jennie doesn't catch her smiling goofily at her. She can't help it. When she's around Jennie, she just feels so carefree and light. Like she doesn't have a care in the world. Jennie has a habit of making her forget about everything else, only focusing on the dark-haired girl in front of her like she has tunnel vision. Part of Chaeyoung is terrified about how fast she is falling for Jennie. Yet it just feels so natural. Like, somehow, Chaeyoung was _meant_ to come to New York and fate would make her and Jennie cross paths.

It's silly and irrational to think of it this way; but what if the nagging feeling Chaeyoung had to move to New York had something to do with Jennie?

Just as she is silently assuring herself that this isn't the case at all, Chaeyoung happens to look up and catch Jennie wiping a smear of ketchup off her cheek. Once she's been caught, Jennie groans and buries her head in her hands, protesting that Chaeyoung wasn't meant to see that.

No. Maybe they _were_ destined to meet.

After they have had their fill of fatty food, they take an amble to Washington Square Park- a place Chaeyoung is yet to become habituated with. Neither of them are ready to go home yet. It's a bright, clear afternoon with the first chills of winter creeping up on them. As they walk, Jennie begins telling Chaeyoung all about Christmas in New York- reassuring her how much she will love it. In a way, it almost feels like Jennie is persuading Chaeyoung to stay here over the festive period. At first Chaeyoung thinks she is simply fooling herself and telling herself what she wants to hear, then thinks about what Jennie said about the dismal Christmases she endures with her father and maybe she isn't so far off the mark after all.

They stop to get ice cream, despite it technically being too cold. They sit down on a bench in the park, nestled in between a copse of trees. Over here, they are hardly bothered by passers-by. At one point a golden retriever lollops over to them, it's tongue stuck out goofily as it jumps up at Chaeyoung and begins to try and attack her face with kisses. She squeals and shies away, not used to being around dogs. She grew up in a cat household, having little interaction with dogs.

Jennie simply laughs at their encounter, calmly clicking her fingers at the dog and telling it to sit at her fit. Miraculously, it does. It whines at Jennie's heel and tries to jump up again but the older girl is firm. Eventually its owner comes puffing over, apparently having let go of the leash whilst on a walk. He thanks the girls profusely and begins to tug it away, though it digs its heels into the dirt and tries to go back to Jennie.

"I had no idea you were a dog whisperer," remarks Chaeyoung.

"I'd hardly call it that," Jennie laughs. "I just know what to do with them, I guess. I have two dogs back in Seoul called Kai and Kuma. Obviously I can't bring them over here because of my long hours but I miss them all the time."

"Really?" For some reason, Chaeyoung is slightly taken aback. "I always had you down for a cat person, funnily enough."

Jennie scrunches her face up. "No, not really. My friend has cats but I never really liked them. Dogs are such better pets. They're friendlier and actually want to spend time with you. Cats just slink around and look at you with those creepy eyes."

The irony is lost on Jennie that her eyes are extremely feline. They are not in the slightest bit creepy, they are beautiful.

"But dogs are so... demanding," Chaeyoung gestures with her hands. Jennie emits a small gasp of offence. "Cats leave you to your own devices and come for cuddles on their terms. You can be your own person with cat. But with dogs you're simply a dog owner, they take up so much of your time that you're hardly a person anymore."

"Park Chaeyoung, I'm deeply offended by your words," Jennie tells her. "I can't believe you'd break my heart like this. Just when we were getting along so well..."

"I'm sorry! Maybe one day you can change my mind. For now though, I'm a staunch cat person."

Jennie side-eyes her, trying to maintain a stony countenance but cracking out into a smile. "Okay. You're on. One day I _will_ turn you into a dog person."

***

Jennie calls Lisa round that night when she has come back from her afternoon with Chaeyoung. Her best friend is delighted, telling Jennie she is leaving the studio to come over straight away. Ay this, Jennie feels an intense stab of guilt. She has been completely abandoning her friend as of late, and yet Lisa remains undyingly loyal to her. Knowing Lisa has been waiting for this call breaks Jennie's heart. She will have to make more of an effort with her. However, once you grow up and leave college and live respective, opposing lives; it becomes much more difficult to remain friends. Despite Lisa only living twenty minutes away from Jennie, it feels much further.

The older girl sets out a blanket nest on the couch, lights a few scented candles and puts a bag of popcorn in the microwave while taking a few cans of Coke out of the fridge. Hopefully these treats will do a good job at thawing Lisa's heart, making her forgive Jennie for being such a terrible friend. Albeit, Lisa is not the type of person to hold grudges like that, the older girl still feels like she has to make up for lost time.

Thirty minutes later, a loud knocking alerts Jennie that her friend has arrived. She hurries over to the front door, slipping slightly in her fluffy socks. Upon seeing Lisa stood on the threshold, Jennie throws her arms around her neck and embraces her slightly. Lisa chokes slightly at the sudden onslaught of affection, but happily wraps her arms around Jennie. The younger girl smells of sweat masked by a fruity Victoria's Secret body spray but she is _Lisa_ , and that's all that matters.

"I've missed you so much," Jennie tells her, closing the front door behind her. "I'm so sorry I haven't really been in touch. Work has been crazy busy but I have more free time now."

"Hey, it's okay," smiles Lisa. Her smile is so bright and easygoing, never having lost the childlike earnest and innocence. "I get it! I've been really busy too but we're finished with performances for a while so I'm kind of at a loose end at the moment."

She slips her shoes off at the door and flops onto Jennie's couch, Jennie curling up beside her. The older girl flaps out a fluffy blanket so it effectively covers both of them, cocooning them together. It makes them both giggle.

Spending time with Lisa is so easy to Jennie. Sometimes she can be overbearing and hyperactive, but she will always be Jennie's best friend and younger sister. No matter what happens between them or how far their paths stray, Jennie will always harbour a huge amount of love for her younger counterpart.

"What's been happening in your life then?" questions Lisa. "I didn't ask Jisoo because I wanted to hear it from you. Plus Jisoo is always too busy to talk these days."

This does little to ease Jennie's culpability. Knowing that both of Lisa's best friends have been distant with her makes her feel terrible.

"Just work, really. There was this really difficult case, you know the one I told you about?" And to deflect the news about Chaeyoung, Jennie launches into a lengthy spiel about all the details of her case. While Lisa listens attentively, nodding in the appropriate places and interjecting with comments, it's very apparent that it's all going over her head. Which, is the point. Because Jennie is delaying the inevitable.

"How was Nayeon's birthday? I saw all the photos and videos. It looked insane."

"Yeah, it was," laughs Jennie at the memory of Nayeon passing out and flashing her underwear. "Hey, you know Jeongyeon who works at the bakery? Well guess what..."

The tale of Jeongyeon and Nayeon kills about another six minutes, and then Jennie finally realises she has to suck it up and stop avoiding the imminent. While she feels apprehensive to break the news to Lisa, a small part of her is just bursting to tell her the amazing news at the same time. She supposes it's only natural to want to share every detail of your life with your best friend- particularly involving your love life. Jennie's has been very sparse for the past few years, so Chaeyoung coming along has brought unprecedented excitement into her life.

"And... there's something else," Jennie finally admits, biting her lip. She intakes a deep breath. "I've met someone."

It takes an infinitesimal moment for her news to sink in, before Lisa's face cracks out into a grin- with a broad smile and shining eyes. She squeals happily, slapping Jennie's leg in excitement.

"What the hell?" she exclaims, leaning forward to hug Jennie. "That's amazing! I can't- tell me all about it!"

"She's called Chaeyoung," Jennie begins, slowly, deliberating her words carefully. Now it is all out in the open, she supposes there is no point holding back. "And I don't think I've ever felt like this for anyone before."

Lisa's squeak is so high-pitched Jennie guesses only dogs could hear at that frequency.

"I cannot believe you just said that! _You_! You never like anybody! Okay, what does she look like?"

Jennie frowns. "It shouldn't matter what she looks like but... she's beautiful. Long dark hair, brown inquisitive eyes. Really nice lips-"

"Does she have any hot sisters on the market?"

"Lisa!"

"Sorry, sorry. Tell me more."

"She works at Jeongyeon's but I met her when she was busking on the subway. She's really good. The whole reason she moved here is because she wants to be a musician. Oh, and she's from Australia originally. But she was actually born in Auckland. Crazy right?"

When Jennie finally looks up at Lisa, she sees her best friend looking at her with a slightly dazed expression. The older girl knows she's dumped a lot of information on her in such a short space of time but, honestly, she should be able to keep up. Lisa is known for talking at one hundred miles an hour too, she should be used to this.

"I'm really happy for you, Jen," the younger girl takes her hand, which is slightly greasy from eating popcorn. "Honestly... I always worry about you being lonely. I know you have friends at work but on a weekend you just isolate yourself. I'm glad this Chaeyoung has managed to get you out of your shell a bit. You deserve to be happy and loved."

Jennie feels emotion welling in her throat as she stares into her best friend's heartfelt eyes. Sympathy rolls off of Lisa, palpable and heavy in the air. All Jennie can do is throw her arm around her shoulder, bringing Lisa in close for an awkward hug which results in the younger girl yelping when she gets elbowed in the boob.

"When do I get to meet her?"

Jennie falters, her mind racing with excuses. "Well, not this weekend because Jisoo is coming over and it's our weekend for the three of us-"

"No way, you have to invite her along!" protests Lisa. "I want to meet her and Jisoo will too. We can go out for dinner and drinks after." Upon seeing Jennie's disapproving expression, the younger girl rolls her eyes. "I said _drinks_ , not clubbing, Grandma. Don't worry, you'll be tucked up in bed for eleven pm."

"I didn't mean that," grumbles Jennie, folding her arms across her chest. Lisa gives her a knowing look. They both know she meant _exactly_ that.

***

Before work on Thursday morning, Chaeyoung receives a phone call just as she is pulling on her tights. She hops around her bedroom trying to locate the source of the noise and ends up crashing into a heap on the floor, having lost her balance while manoeuvring one leg into the foot of her tights.

With a groan, her hand brushes across her bedside table until she finds her phone. Its Jennie. Dread washes over her as she presses the green circle on the screen, trying to even out her breath. What on earth could Jennie want at eight am?

"Morning, Chaeyoung!" Jennie sounds cheery despite it being so early. "I didn't wake you up, did I?"

"No, not at all," she replies, still sprawled on the floor. "Are you okay?" 

"Yeah, totally. I forgot to ask you yesterday with all the drama, but my friend Jisoo is in town for a couple of weeks and she wants to know if you want to come to dinner with us on Saturday?" There is a small silence. Chaeyoung can tell Jennie is not quite finished. "N-not that I didn't want to invite you! I suggested it and then she said-"

"Yes," giggles Chaeyoung. "I would love to come."

Jennie is pulled up short. She expected to fight a bigger battle than that trying to convince her. "Wait, really?"

"Of course. She sounds really nice. I want to meet her."

"My friend Lisa is coming too."

"Even better. I can't wait to meet them all."

Jennie pauses, biting her lip. "You're one in a million Chaeyoung."

The younger girl's heart stops as she flounders on the floor, trying to think of something adequate to reply with. Jennie has an awful habit of leaving her speechless with the things she comes out with. Whether she does this intentionally is yet to be determined.

"I-I don't think I am," Chaeyoung stutters. "But thanks."

They hang up soon after, Chaeyoung needing to pull herself off the floor and resume getting ready for work. She wants to get there early so she has time to ask Jeongyeon how her talk with Nayeon went. Chaeyoung is slightly worried that her boss won't be speaking to her- especially if it went badly and Jeongyeon ended up more hurt than she was to begin with. Something tells Chaeyoung this won't be the case. She saw how the two girls locked eyes in the coffeeshop, that there was an underlying softness in their otherwise frosty gazes. It will have gone well. She just _knows_ it.

Jennie may not get off so easily with Nayeon. The girl seems like she can hold a grudge for a while. Even if their meeting went well, she will still punish Jennie for deceiving her. Jennie is strong. More to the point, she is familiarised with Nayeon's temperament- she will be able to handle herself.

Chaeyoung walks to work with a spring in her step that morning. It doesn't even occur to her that Jeongyeon might be pissed off when she gets into work. All she can focus on is the prospect of meeting Jennie's friends on Saturday. Surprisingly, she doesn't feel apprehensive about it. In a way, it feels like she already knows them because Jennie talks about them so much. The older girl holds her friends in such high esteem that Chaeyoung automatically has to trust them, because Jennie knows best. And if these girls are her best friends then they must be trustworthy.

As expected, Jeongyeon is the only person in the bakery when Chaeyoung arrives. She's in the back room, turning on all the ovens and wiping down the surfaces to eradicate any stray dust that may have accumulated overnight. She hears the door shut when Chaeyoung steps upon the threshold. Their gazes briefly meet, before she determinedly continues scrubbing.

Chaeyoung steps forward cautiously. "Jeong?" No response. "Jeong, are you okay?" She thinks she can hear the girl let out of a small huff of air, but doesn't actually reply.

It feels like someone has tipped a bucket of ice water over Chaeyoung. She never expected this reaction from her boss. Does that mean their meeting didn't go well? Has Chaeyoung inadvertently made it worse? Even worse, what if Jeongyeon fires her? Although this would be an extreme measure, she is well within her right to do so considering she owns the establishment.

"Jeong?" She tries again. Jeongyeon calmly puts the cloth away and begins washing her hands in the industrial sink. Chaeyoung takes a few bold steps forward, closing the gap between them. "Please talk to me."

This time, her boss turns around. While she doesn't exactly look angry, her expression is tricky to decipher. There are elements of hurt, anger, disappointment and frustration on her visage.

"What do you want me to say?" Her tone is so cold is knocks the air out of Chaeyoung's lungs. Her mouth opens and then promptly closes, having no idea how to respond. It feels awful to be on the receiving end of her friend's fury. This was never meant to happen.

"I-I'm sorry," stammers Chaeyoung, having a hard time fighting back tears. "I just wanted to know how it went."

Jeongyeon hesitates, eyeing her up and down flatly. Then, with a resigned sigh, she replies, "It was fine."

Chaeyoung waits tactfully, wondering if she is going to divulge more information. When she is greeted with silence, she realises she must be the bigger person and initiate this conversation because right now it's like squeezing blood out of a stone.

"Did you talk it out?"

For a moment it seems as if Jeongyeon is not going to reply. Then, "Yeah. We did."

"Oh." Chaeyoung fiddles with her fingers nervously. "Are you... going to see each other again?"

"We're going out for dinner tomorrow night."

Under any normal circumstance, Chaeyoung would have rushed to text Jennie the exciting news; basking in their victory. However, Chaeyoung knows she needs to make amends with Jeongyeon before she does anything else. Their friendship is much more important.

"Look, I'm really sorry for lying to you yesterday. I know I shouldn't have done it and it sounds cliché saying it was for your own good, but at the time I thought it was. If I'd have known it would upset you then-"

Jeongyeon turns around, looking tired. "Chae, it's not even that. I appreciate what you did, it actually went really well. It just felt pretty crappy being lied to, like you were using me to keep Jennie happy."

Chaeyoung's mouth drops open. "No! No, no, no! It was never meant to be like that, I swear! She told me how unhappy Nayeon was about it and I mentioned you weren't happy either and we both agreed on a way to try and get you to talk to each other again. I didn't do it to impress Jennie or to belittle you or make fun of you- I swear it!"

"Do you know how hard it is to stay mad at you?" asks Jeongyeon once a few moments have passed.

"No, you have to stay mad. What I did was wrong-"

"Shut up and come here." Jeongyeon rolls her eyes and pulls Chaeyoung into a tight hug, their cheeks pressed together. Chaeyoung buries her head in her shoulders, thankful that Jeongyeon has found it in her heart to forgive her. It never occurred to Chaeyoung that that was how Jeongyeon felt, like Chaeyoung didn't actually care about her happiness and only wanted to impress Jennie. How could she be such a bad friend? The only saving grace is that the meeting went well, the girls managing to work out their differences and willing to start again on a fresh page. As they wait for the other girls to turn up, Jeongyeon tells her all about it. While Chaeyoung doesn't feel like she's entitled to know, she's glad to be involved nonetheless.

Seungwan is the first to arrive, surprised to see the two girls here already. After yesterday, Chaeyoung vowed she would apologise to her for being so short and turning down her offer of accompanying them. When Jeongyeon leaves the kitchen to put the goods on display, Chaeyoung sidles over to Seungwan and puts her arm around her shoulder.

"I'm really sorry about yesterday," she tells her, sincerely. "Of course I wanted you to come, but the thing is-"

"Her and Jennie were scheming against me," pipes up Jeongyeon. Neither of them had realised she was leaning in the doorway, watching them with a small smile. "Chae was on a top secret mission which was tricking Nayeon and I into the same room so we could 'talk'." She air quotes the last word, causing Seungwan to gasp and turn her head to Chaeyoung.

"Really? Did it work?"

"Why don't you ask Jeong yourself?" She smirks slightly.

"It went really well. We're going out for dinner tomorrow. At first it was so hard telling her how I felt but then I just thought 'fuck it'. And I'm glad I did. So, really, I have to thank you, Chae."

"I knew you would eventually." Her impertinence earns her a swat over the head with a tea towel.

"Why don't we all go out for coffee after work?" suggests Jeongyeon. "Chaeyoung's treat since she all owes us."

Instead of protesting like they expected her to, Chaeyoung smiles broadly and nods in agreement. "Of course. Anything you want."

Jeongyeon claps her on the shoulder, grinning. "You may regret that offer."

***

Jennie braces herself in the elevator on the way to the office. She already has a speech planned out on her head.

" _Have you heard of the expression 'the road to hell is paved with good intentions'? Okay, maybe not that exactly. What about 'for the greater good?' Sometimes, for the greater good, you have to make sacrifices. And that's what happened yesterday, I made a sacrifice. It was for your own happiness, which is the greater good if you hadn't already guessed-_ "

However, to Jennie's utter shock, she doesn't have to launch into an appeal, because when she reaches her cubicle, instead of being greeted with a glare that could turn her to stone, Nayeon is actually _grinning_ at her.

"Morning," she announces, like it is the most normal thing in the world.

Jennie blinks, wearily. "What's the catch?"

"No catch! Can I not be happy?"

This does an effective job of pricking her ears up. "Happy? How come?"

Now it is Nayeon's turn to fix her with a glare. "I think you know exactly why." Jennie is about to introduce the concept of the greater good when Nayeon continues talking. "It actually went really well. We're going to dinner tomorrow night."

"What?" Jennie squeaks so loudly it earns her a few irritated glances from her colleagues. "Are you serious?" Nayeon nods which causes Jennie to lean back in her chair, smirking and cracking her fingers triumphantly. "I guess you owe me thanks."

"Um, no way! You should be graetful I'm even speaking to you! I should be annoyed."

"Who said you not talking to me would be a punishment?" 

Nayeon lashes out to hit Jennie with her notebook but she manages to dodge out of the way in time. Despite it all, they're giggling breathlessly which earns them even more estranged glances from across the office. Both girls are too engrossed to realise. It's lucky that the disturbance doesn't cause Mr Arnold to come storming out of his office. That is one of his favourite tricks to instill the fear of god into his workers.

"Now Jeongyeon and I have talked over our differences, I think it's time you and Chaeyoung do the same."

Jennie looks up from logging into her computer, with a frown. "There's nothing for us to talk over."

Nayeon rolls her eyes, pityingly. "Right. Like you're not too terrified to admit how you really feel for each other."

"I... I'm not! I'm just waiting for the right time," protests Jennie, defensively. When the right time arises, she will indeed spill her guts to Chaeyoung. Maybe. It's unlikely. But she _could_. Nayeon doesn't know that she wouldn't.

Judging by the flat look her best friend is giving her, she doesn't believe a word Jennie is saying.

Truthfully, Jennie doesn't either.

***

Jisoo takes a cab from the airport to Jennie's apartment where Jennie and Lisa are preparing the couch, spreading an array of blankets and pillows over it. They ordered Jisoo's favourite takeout and it's currently heating up in the microwave, while the cheesecake Lisa made is cooling in the freezer.

Tonight, the two girls are staying at Jennie's place. She's been looking forward to it all week, cleaning her apartment from top to bottom whenever she got a spare few moments when she wasn't too exhausted from work. The maid took care of the rest for her. The place is spotless and immaculate, though Jennie doubts it will remain this way after her friends have been over for the weekend. Jisoo is meant to be staying at Lisa's place tomorrow, but they will both no doubt wind up at Jennie's again. She doesn't mind in the slightest. It gets far too lonely in the week for Jennie's liking. The sooner she works up the nerve to invite Chaeyoung round, the better.

Jennie is suddenly struck by a pang of longing, wishing Chaeyoung was accompanying them tonight too. Although she knows Chaeyoung will be tucked up in bed, no doubt FaceTiming Chanyeol because they're doing that a lot nowadays, she still feels bad for not offering. Jennie thought that meeting her friends in a civilised setting where they couldn't overwhelm her was a good idea, now she's wondering if it would have been better to throw her in the deep end.

Then again, maybe not. As selfish as it sounds, and as much as Jennie enjoys her time spent with Chaeyoung, she has been looking forward to spending the night with her two best friends. Around them, Jennie does not have to hold back. She can say the first thing on her mind, act as goofily as possible and doesn't have to worry about having to impress them like she does around Chaeyoung. There is a lot of weirdness about Jennie that Chaeyoung is going to have to get used to if she plans on staying around. However, Jennie does not want to scare her yet so withholds this side of her; only comfortable enough to show it to her closest friends.

Despite just coming off a twelve hour flight, and a twenty minute cab ride, Jisoo looks stunning. As always. Her face is bare from makeup and she is dressed down in her baggiest and comfiest clothes, which somehow makes Jennie love her even more. Seeing her as Jisoo, her oldest and best friend, not Kim Jisoo the supermodel, feels so much more personal. Jennie squeezes her tightly even though she only saw her a couple of weeks ago. Lisa bounds around Jisoo like an excitable puppy, smothering her in such a bone-crushing embrace that Jisoo emits a squawk like a bird caught in a vice.

"It's good to be home," is all Jisoo says before flopping face down onto Jennie's sofa.

However, the other two girls have to haul her into the dining room where they set out the food because there is an abundance of it. Plus, Jennie does not want them to spill anything on her expensive sofa. It was a housewarming present from her grandmother and wants to keep it as immaculate as possible.

Jisoo perks up once she's sat at the table and some of her sarcasm and zest slowly begins to return as she bickers with Lisa. As Jennie watches over them with a fond smile, her eyes flicker to the empty chair at the other end of the table and becomes awash with the sensation that she wishes Chaeyoung were here too. She would fit in so well.

When Lisa proudly sets down the cheesecake in the centre of the table with flourish, Jisoo jokes that if she tries to digest it then she will become seriously ill with food poisoning and sent to hospital. However, she finishes every mouthful and even has seconds. Jennie almost misses the look Lisa gives the oldest girl when she isn't looking. It is soft, sincere and radiates utter adoration. Lisa is looking at Jisoo like she is the only one in the room. The only one who matters. 

It leaves Jennie feeling slightly wrong-footed. Her eyes dart between the two of them to detect any more romantic undertones between their interactions, but nothing screams out at her. Apart from that infinitesimal moment, Lisa is acting completely normal. Jisoo is none the wiser and Jennie wonders just how she would react if she had caught Lisa staring at her like that.

When the dishes have been put in the dish washer and the leftover food wrapped and put in Jennie's fridge, the girls retire back into the living room to watch a zombie movie Lisa has been droning on about but was too scared to watch on her own. Jennie presses play on the DVD player and snuggles down in between the two girls, keeping a close eye on them.

Halfway through the movie, Jennie grows bored and restless. While Lisa and Jisoo have a shared passion for action and horror movies, Jennie finds them utterly tiresome. Still, she reminds herself to make an effort and not spoil one of the rare weekends where they all reunited. Instead, she discreetly goes on her phone under the blanket.

**Jennie (8:03pm): help i think my best friend is in love with my other best friend????**

**Chaeyoung (8:06pm): OMG!!!**

The dark haired girl cannot repress the smile tugging at her lips, typing a reply back to Chaeyoung. As she locks her phone, she looks up and sees Lisa is giving her a knowing look. She simply ignores it, focusing on the television and trying to ignore the heat in her cheeks at being caught in the act.

"Is there someone else you wish was here?" Lisa asks suddenly out of the blue, garnering both girls attention. Jisoo scrunches her face up in confusion, but Jennie knows _exactly_ what she means.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she replies breezily, never taking her eyes off the screen. It is in the split seconds of weakness where Lisa pounces, and if Jennie puts up a stubborn front then her friend will drop the subject.

"Yes you do," taunts Lisa, poking Jennie's cheek. The older girl flinches away, but when Lisa persists and begins digging her bony fingers into Jennie's neck to tickle her, she begins giggling uncontrollably.

"Lisa, get off!" she gasps, in between laughs. She rolls on the sofa and narrowly avoids kicking Jisoo in the face, who looks less than pleased by the disturbance. She was engrossed in the movie and now has to pause it while she waits for her friends to tire themselves out.

"Why don't you invite Chaeyoung round now?" suggests Lisa. "It's not too late."

Jennie shakes her head immediately, the mere thought instilling fear in her. "No. Not yet. I-I don't want to rush into things. I've only known her a month."

"But you even said you'd never felt like this about someone else before."

"Yeah, I know. It's just... I'm not very good at this kind of thing," Jennie shrinks in on herself as soon as the admittance is left hanging in the air. Albeit, her best friends already know this, but owning up to it is humiliating. "And I don't think she is either. I don't want to rush and ruin it."

Jisoo emits a sigh. "Out of all the people in Manhattan and you just _had_ to fall for the one who's just as hopeless as you."

"What about tomorrow? Why don't you ask her round then?"

"I... maybe. I'll think about it. Let's just watch the movie," Jennie says quickly, turning her hyper focus onto the screen, ignoring Lisa's eyes boring into her like lasers. Eventually, they get absorbed back into the film and because it is so boring they have missed nothing vital from the plot.

Jennie risks checking her phone one more time.

**Chaeyoung (8:25pm): since we were so successful last time should we work on operation lisoo tomorrow?**

***

That night, Chaeyoung tosses her phone on her bed and sits down at her desk with her notebook open on a blank page. Now is a perfect opportunity to begin writing again, especially when this melody has been plaguing her all week. Just when she thought she had potential lyrics, she would be distracted by something and forget it completely. Now, with no distractions, it is the perfect time to focus on her music.

However, now she has sat down with focus, her mind is blank.

Her pen taps against the page, a frown graces her features as she strains her brain. For anything. Something. A word. A letter. Just... _something_.

In a daze, Chaeyoung's mind wanders to Jennie as it usually does when she is unoccupied. Her long dark hair, her feline eyes, her gummy smile, the way her cheeks puff when she smiles broadly and her eyes get this earnest gleam-

_I was enchanted to meet you._

Chaeyoung jumps slightly, wondering where the sudden burst of inspiration came from. Without questioning it, she scrawls down the words as they come to her.

_The lingering question kept me up_

_Two a.m. who do you love?_

_I wonder till I'm wide awake_

_Now I'm pacing back and forth wishing you were at my door_

And then what? Chaeyoung draws a blank. Only when her eyes happen to flicker up to the previous line does her face crack into a smile as she is struck.

_I'd open up and you would say_

_"It was enchanting to meet you"_

_I was enchanted to meet you_

Striking while the iron is hot, Chaeyoung titles the song 'Enchanted' at the top of the page, underlining it several times and doodling a few roses around it while she thinks. Subconsciously she has drawn a small cat that strongly resembles Jennie.

Casting her mind back, Chaeyoung recalls the night of Nayeon's party. This is when she is certain her feelings blossomed for Jennie. Although she knew she had a crush on her, this night only affirmed that Chaeyoung felt something stronger. _Enchantment_.

She thinks about how she felt dancing close to Jennie, so close she could have reached out and touched her if she so desired. How the older girl's eyes sparkled in the strobe lights, how her hips swayed in time to the music, how her laughter only became more breathy the more she drank.

_This night is sparkling don't you let it go_

_I'm wonder struck blushing all the way home_

_I'll spend forever wondering if you knew_

_I was enchanted to meet you_

Chaeyoung leans back in her chair, suddenly feeling drained. She had forgotten how exhausting songwriting was. A headache is beginning to bloom at her temples with how hard she has been straining herself. She wants to call it a night but there is so much buzzing around her head; so many thoughts of Jennie she wants to articulate and put down onto paper. Put into a song.

_Please don't be in love with someone else._

She thinks about all the times she has sat across a table from Jennie, watching her every move in awe. Memorising every curve and line on her face, listening to every octave of her soft voice and letting it wash over her and consume all her senses.

The way she feels with Jennie is incomparable to anything she has ever felt. Or anyone. The thought of losing Jennie terrifies Chaeyoung, she does not know what she would do without her. She has become so accustomed to her presence over the past few months that life doesn't seem worth living if it's not with Jennie. She's hit by the sudden urge to call Jennie and spill her guts, to tell her just how she feels because withholding her emotions is slowly choking and killing her. Chaeyoung doesn't know how long she can survive at this distance with Jennie. Every fibre in her being wants to be close to Jennie at all times. She feels like half of her is missing in Jennie's absence. Whether it is too soon to feel these kind of things, Chaeyoung doesn't know. All she is certain of is that this is the truth- she has fallen dizzyingly and terrifyingly hard for Jennie.

 _Please don't have somebody waiting on you_.

***

Although Jennie would vehemently deny it, she is terrified about the prospect of Chaeyoung meeting her friends. Not because she doesn't trust them, because she already knows that they will not alienate Chaeyoung or be rude to her- they know how much this means to Jennie so they will be on their best behaviour. No. Jennie is scared Chaeyoung will fall for one of them; charismatic Jisoo or passionate Lisa. Both girls are brimming full of their own charm and good looks, it won't take much for Jennie to fade into the background if Chaeyoung becomes wonderstruck with one of them. While Jennie would never vocalise it aloud, there is a small, cynical part of her that wonders whether Lisa will try and flirt with her. Chaeyoung seems like her type.

As Jennie stares at her reflection in the bathroom mirror while applying her mirror, there is only one prevalent thought in her mind: _what the hell have you done_?

Jisoo is showering and Lisa is getting changed in Jennie's room, blaring rap music loudly. Usually Jennie would sing the lyrics along with her, but tonight, she is having a hard time finding the enthusiasm. They haven't even stepped foot out of the apartment and already she wants this whole thing to be over.

Subconsciously, Jennie is sluggish whilst getting ready. She applies her makeup with rare precision, laboriously curling her hair and tugging on her outfit at a snails pace. Jisoo and Lisa are pacing around the lounge, conscious of the time and not wanting to be late for their reservation. Jennie doesn't even bother looking at the clock, knowing that if she does anxiety will grip her in an even tighter hold. She's having difficulty breathing enough as it is.

Eventually, once she hears Lisa pounding at her bedroom door, she speeds into action. Swiping her phone and purse off her vanity without second thought, Jennie strolls through feigning confidence like she wasn't on the brink of an anxiety attack moments prior. Jisoo has her eyebrows arched slightly, though chooses not to say anything.

They agreed to take Jennie's car tonight, sick of relying on Ubers and cabs. Jennie feels more in control when she drives, like she can decide when the night has to come to and end; because if allowed, Lisa will be out until dawn. Despite her taunting, Lisa is right, Jennie does like to be tucked in bed for eleven pm or even earlier. Already she feels exhausted having to turn out this late. For the past few weeks, her social life has been chockablock. Jennie looks forward to the day when her and Chaeyoung can just take it steady, lazing around at each other's apartments instead of constantly having to go out. While Jennie enjoys showing her around the city, she is a homebody at heart.

"You two get in the back," Jennie instructs, opening the driver's door. Immediately, this makes both of her best friends puff up with indignation.

"What? I called shotgun on the way down!" whines Lisa.

"Um, I'm the oldest so I should get shotgun by principal!" Jisoo protests, shoving Lisa in the shoulder, both of them trying to scrabble inside at the same time.

"Chaeyoung gets the front seat. I don't want either of you scaring her in the backseat. She'll probably feel awkward."

"Oh I'm about to make it even more awkward," grumbles Lisa, begrudgingly crawling into the back with an equally irritated Jisoo. Both girls sit with their arms crossed over their chests, glaring holes into the back of Jennie's head. Occasionally, the driver will turn around to scold them and tell them to buck up their attitude before they meet Chaeyoung.

They pick Chaeyoung up from outside the subway station, the younger girl reassuring Jennie it would be more convenient to collect her from there instead of trying to navigate down her narrow street. As soon as Jennie pulls up, Jisoo and Lisa's attitudes change immediately. Jisoo wears and easy smile whereas Lisa is beaming. Surprisingly, neither of them look false- they seem like they are actually looking forward to meeting Chaeyoung. Jennie feels a rush of affection wash over her, only now appreciating how much her best friend's do for her. Jennie knows that even if they didn't like Chaeyoung (which is impossible) that they would do their upmost best to pretend they did for Jennie's sake.

Once Chaeyoung sees the vehicle pull up on the sidewalk, she gulps. The car is sleek and black and the leather upholstery is pristine. It must have cost an arm and a leg. Or _two_ legs. Nervously, she opens the door to a smiling Jennie and two unfamiliar girls in the back seat, leaning forward to greet her. She sits down in the car, closing the door before turning to all the girls. She's so nervous her heart is leaping in her throat, making it difficult to speak. Chaeyoung is glad its dark otherwise they'd be able to see the peony beacon of her cheeks.

"Hi, I'm Rosie. Roseanne Park. But my real name is Park Chaeyoung and all my friends call me-" She stops abruptly upon seeing Jisoo and Lisa's eyebrows flicker up and Jennie watching her with a soft smile on her face at her nervous rambling. A flush is prominent on Chaeyoung's features. "Chaeyoung. Call me Chaeyoung."

"I'm Jisoo," the dark haired girl smiles, her Cupid's Bow looks particularly like a heart when she does this. Jennie was right, she's ten times more stunning in real life. High budget photoshoots do her beauty no justice at all. "It's so nice to finally meet you, Chaeyoung."

"You too. I've heard so many lovely things about you. Both of you," she adds quickly upon realising Jennie's other best friend is sat there.

"Don't let them think I like them, Chaeyoung," Jennie teases, checking her rearview mirror and pulling out onto the road.

"I'm Lisa," the girl with the ash brown hair and bangs grins. Immediately, Chaeyoung can tell she is the life of the party; this is evident due to the cheeky glint in her eye and the mischievousness in her features. Though, she seems totally harmless. Very amicable, actually. "It's nice to finally meet the girl Jennie has been talking so much about."

"Hey!" Jennie snaps, not taking her eyes off the road. "I won't hesitate to kick your ass out and let you walk home."

Lisa leans forward and places both hands on Jennie's shoulders, giving her a massage. "But you wouldn't _dream_ of kicking your best friend and favourite person in the world out, right?"

Chaeyoung is loathed to admit it, but she envies the way Lisa can so freely touch Jennie without second thought.

"Hate to break it to you, pipsqueak, but that's _my_ title," Jisoo pulls Lisa back. Chaeyoung finds herself smiling at their easy banter, it reminds her a lot of her own group of friends; how Seungwan and Sooyoung will bicker, or how Dahyun always knows exactly what nerve to strike to get Jeongyeon ticked off. Or, if she delves even deeper, how her and Chanyeol behaved when they were kids. Well, when _she_ was a kid. Chanyeol was always several steps ahead of her.

Chaeyoung can see herself getting along with these girls.

"How was work today?" questions Jennie, speaking directly to Chaeyoung.

"Good. Really busy. Seung made this new type of cranberry cookie and everyone is going crazy for it. She said she's going to teach me how to make it on Monday."

"Great, we can stay there for lunch," Jennie smiles, Chaeyoung automatically smiles too.

"Fine by me, but I haven't forgotten the last time I made you a sandwich and you left it."

"Hey!" she cries. "You know I love what you make for me. I was just... having a bad day."

Jisoo and Lisa exchange glances from across the backseat, rolling their eyes discreetly. From simply listening to how Jennie talks to Chaeyoung, with a certain fondness in her tone that is present for no one else, they know already this is the real deal. And, to their relief, the feeling is mutual. Chaeyoung keeps stealing sneaky glimpses at the older girl when she doesn't think anyone is looking, but the pair of beady eyes in the backseat see all.

For dinner they have reservations at a hip restaurant that looks more like a nightclub than an eating establishment under Lisa's recommendation. Chaeyoung seems in awe of the place, looking around with wide eyes. There's so much noise. Loud music plays from the speakers and people chat freely and rowdily, not caring about what volume level they reach. It hardly seems like a relaxed place to enjoy a meal, totally out of Chaeyoung's depth, but then she realises she needs to make a good impression so rolls along casually with it.

They are seated upstairs where it seems to quieten down slightly. Chaeyoung can finally hear herself think, which is dangerous because she's seated opposite Jennie and can't take her eyes off the older girl. Jisoo sits beside her, seemingly already having taken her under her wing. Chaeyoung doesn't mind. Jisoo is friendly enough, and getting on Jennie's best friend's good side cannot be a bad thing.

"So, Jisoo, you're a supermodel," Chaeyoung says, taking a sip out of the non-alcoholic cocktail Lisa recommended she try. "That's so amazing! Tell me a bit about it."

"Trust me, it's far less glamorous than you imagine," laughs Jisoo. "It's a lot of flights, waking up at god knows o'clock in the morning and sat in hair and makeup still half asleep. The free clothes are cool, though. I haven't had to pay for anything for myself in a while."

"You can break that streak and pay for dinner tonight," Jennie easily remarks, not even looking up from reading through her menu. Chaeyoung suppresses a smile. She's seeing a new side of Jennie tonight and she likes it. It feels like she's peeling back the layers and discovering the new, silver-tongued and snarky Jennie Kim she didn't know existed.

"You're paying for your own, Kim. My salary still isn't as high as yours," scoffs Jisoo, yet there is a smirk playing on her lips.

"Either way, I don't mind who pays for me," Lisa interjects. "You can fight amongst yourselves. Chaeyoung and I will happily take the free food."

"Right," Chaeyoung nods with a giggle. At this, Jennie looks up and offers her a small, genuine smile. Chaeyoung reciprocates, feeling more at ease every passing minute. Spending time with Jisoo and Lisa is not unlike being with the girls in the bakery, except there is more pressure for them to get along for Jennie's sake. So far so good. If Chaeyoung can keep up like this, she might be in with a chance of winning them over.

Her and Jisoo agree to share a chicken dish, while Lisa and Jennie squabble about whether they want to share pasta or have their own respective meals. In the end, Jennie's desire to have barbecue ribs wins over Lisa's pleas to share the pasta. The younger girl pouts a lot and Chaeyoung feels her heart softening, wondering whether she should offer to share with Lisa. When she catches Jennie's eye, the girl seems to know what she's considering and gives a small but firm shake of her head.

While they wait for their dishes to arrive, they chat amongst themselves. Jisoo tells Chaeyoung the gritty truth about being a supermodel and Chaeyoung feels like she will view the career with a lot less envy than she used to. Then Lisa becomes to tell her what it's like to be a choreographer for the stars, which seems equally as fascinating. Chaeyoung begins to feel like she may be wasting her life away in the bakery.

"The whole reason I came here was because I want to be a singer," she admits, feeling like the girls will not scorn her. As expected, they don't. Lisa cocks her head in interest and Jisoo watches her intently, waiting for her to continue. "I go busking most days, just singing on the subway. I don't know whether I should start doing it on the street where there's more people but... I don't know. I guess I don't want to do that in case people ignore me and it proves to be a big waste of time."

For the first time in a while, Jennie speaks up. "Don't say that, Chaeyoung. You're an amazing singer and more people deserve to hear you." She then pauses, deliberating over whether her next words will be too much. In the company of her friends, she wonders if they will tease her afterwards. "I'd watch you anywhere."

Lisa discreetly mimes being sick which earns her a swift kick under the table from Jisoo.

"Why don't you try and get a spot at some clubs?" suggests Jisoo. "That way you'd start getting a name for yourself."

"Hey... that's actually a really good idea!" Chaeyoung smiles brightly. "I might try it! I doubt I'll get anywhere but I have to try, right?"

"Right!" Lisa agrees. "We can all come watch you and give you moral support."

"Yeah! I'd love that." Chaeyoung looks up, too quick for Jennie to manage to arrange her face into a smile. Truthfully, she is annoyed that Jisoo offered her such a wise decision. Why didn't Jennie think of that? More to the point, Jisoo is giving Jennie a direct glare which causes her to shrink in her seat. The words are on the tip of her tongue- Jisoo's too- yet she just can't get them out. Chaeyoung looks so excited, how could Jennie tell her right now? How could she take away Chaeyoung's chance to do this for herself? It would be like Jennie snatching the opportunity right out of her hands before she's had time to prove herself.

Lisa manages to swoop in just on time and begins telling them a story about the big gig she had in L.A. which is the reason why she missed Nayeon's birthday. Despite her loveable ditzy persona, Lisa is incredibly perceptive and can sense tension has risen- namely between Jennie and Jisoo. Chaeyoung may seem oblivious but she has noticed it too, a knot growing in her stomach. Has she caused some kind of rift between the two girls? Should she have just kept her mouth shut? Her words were innocuous but somehow Jennie didn't seem impressed. Judging by the way Jisoo keeps glancing at her, neither is she.

"You choreographed for Chunga?" Chaeyoung's mouth drops open as it seems she is the only one listening to Lisa. "That's crazy! I love her!"

"I've worked with her more than once," the girl says, a little smug. "They offered me a place as a mentor on Dancing With The Stars but I said no. I feel like it isn't authentic enough, you know? It's like when you're writing a song; you come up with lyrics to go with the music but I come up with dance moves. It comes so naturally to me now that I can hear any song and come up with a dance on the spot."

"Our Lisa is very humble, if you couldn't tell," Jisoo rolls her eyes. "You'll never see her getting a big head."

"I'm surprised she even managed to get through the door," jokes Jennie, her shine slowly returning. Chaeyoung is immensely relieved. Whatever sparked the tension between her and Jisoo seems to have died out. Hopefully they can forget about it for the rest of the night.

Once their food arrives, Lisa asks Chaeyoung to tell her a little bit about Australia because it is somewhere she's always wanted to visit but never had the opportunity. Jennie listens intently too, even though Chaeyoung has practically told her everything anyway. Listening to Chaeyoung speak with her gentle accent is more than enough for Jennie. It never gets old.

Without realising, Jennie and Chaeyoung are exchanging forkfuls of food and testing each other's food. This has become such routine with their lunch dates that they don't realise what they're doing. Lisa watches them with slightly wide eyes, while Jisoo tries to avert her eyes, feeling like she is intruding on a moment much too personal to intrude. She nudges Lisa gently with her foot, the younger girl has a bad habit of gawping.

"What are you guys doing for Halloween?" asks Jisoo conversationally. "You should do something special since it's your first time here, Chaeyoung."

The girl pats at her mouth with the napkin. "Honestly I hadn't given it any thought. I've mainly been focusing on Christmas because that's what I'm most excited about. We never really did a lot for Halloween back home."

"Jennie throws crazy Halloween parties," Lisa gestures with her hands. Jennie freezes, glaring daggers at her best friend, mildly mortified.

"I-I don't," Jennie protests, meeting Chaeyoung's confused expression. "Lisa is just being a little shit." She swipes at her best friend's head who manages to duck out of the way just in time.

"I had a _few_ Halloween parties years ago," the older girl iterates. "Not anymore."

"We should have one this year!"

"No, Lisa," Jennie snaps. "No parties."

"What about a haunted house?" suggests Chaeyoung. "I'd love to go! I bet they're a lot better than the ones back home."

Jennie considers it for a few seconds, before nodding slowly, a grin breaking out on her face. "Yeah. Let's go to a haunted house. I'll look online and see if I can find the scariest one, but I don't mind driving if we can't find one nearby."

"Do we get an invite?" Jisoo raises her eyebrows.

"You can. But Lisa is too young to be out after dark on Halloween," Jennie pouts and puts on a babyish voice which makes Lisa lunge towards her and grapple her in a headlock. A few customers around them look on in irritation, but Chaeyoung cannot find it in her to be embarrassed. She feels the best she has in weeks. Sitting amongst Jennie and her friends, Chaeyoung feels content. She feels whole.

She feels like she really belongs.

***

Admittedly, Chaeyoung is a little tired when she gets dragged to the bar after dinner. She's either too old to be doing this or needs to get out more. She doesn't want to face either possibility.

If they thought the atmosphere of the restaurant was loud, it is nothing compared to the bar. By now it is peak time, so the building is crammed full of customers with barely enough room to turn around. Chaeyoung sticks close to Jisoo's side, who says she's going to find a booth while Lisa and Jennie go and get drinks.

At the bar, while they wait to be served, Lisa turns to Jennie.

"You're really smitten with her, aren't you?"

Jennie shrugs. "I already told you. I don't think I've ever felt like this before with someone."

"I can understand why. She's hot. And really nice. And she can sing! If you ever get sick of her send her my way." Jennie rolls her eyes and refrains from making any comments about Lisa's mysterious attraction to Jisoo. She doesn't want to spoil the night before it's even properly begun.

"What was the big deal with you and Jisoo earlier?" presses Lisa. "You two were acting really weird."

"Jisoo thinks I should tell her."

Lisa's mouth drops open into an 'o' shape. "You haven't?"Jennie confirms this with a shake of her head. "I mean... you probably should."

"I want her to do it on her own," the older girl replies. Lisa and Jisoo might not understand, but they don't feel the same way for Chaeyoung that Jennie does. She needs to do this on her own. She's capable.

"That's noble and all but it would be a _lot_ easier if you just told her."

Jennie leans against the bar with a sigh. She's been facing a battle with conflicting entities in her head for weeks. The devil on her shoulder wheedles at her to keep it a secret, to see just how Chaeyoung can handle it by herself. Meanwhile, the angel on her other shoulder eggs her on to tell her, that it's only the right thing to do because as far as secrets go, it's a pretty huge one. One that could change the course of Chaeyoung's life forever if she did admit to it.

Truthfully, Jennie knows there is a deeper reason as to why she is keeping it to herself. Simply because she doesn't want to share Chaeyoung with anyone else. As selfish as it sounds, Jennie wants to spend time with her until they come to some kind of... arrangement. Then, she will see. Things are so uncertain in the near future that Jennie needs to know where this relationship is heading first and then she will decide.

Meanwhile, Jisoo and Chaeyoung manage to elbow their way through the mass of bodies on the makeshift dance floor and settle down in a booth, close enough to the bar but far enough away as to not get disturbed by the other patrons. Chaeyoung feels slight trepidation as she sits down beside Jisoo, awkwardness suddenly overwhelming her. So far it has been easy to make conversation with her when the other girls were present, but she can't live up to how cool Jisoo is. She is a high fashion supermodel, and judging by the looks a few people in the bar are giving her they know this too; whereas Chaeyoung is just a baker. How is she meant to impress someone so above her?

"Are you happy you've now bagged a Halloween date with Jennie?" the older girl asks, wiggling her eyebrows in a humorous manner.

"Wait, you did that on purpose?"

"Of course! Lisa was right, she did used to have these insane parties on a yacht out near Staten Island but she's stopped doing that now. I thought you could both do something seeing as neither of you have plans. You can thank me anytime."

"You have to come too!" protests Chaeyoung. "It'll be too scary if just two of us go!"

"Jennie will protect you," Jisoo smirks, which makes Chaeyoung swat her shoulder playfully. "All jokes aside," she says once her laughter has died down. "I'm really glad you met Jennie. She'd never admit it but I think she was going down a bit of a spiral at one point. She never wanted to leave the house, always turned her phone off when we tried to get in touch with her; I don't know what was going on. All I know is that you've made her much happier and we've got our old Jennie back. So... thank you."

Chaeyoung's chest constricts painfully tight, unsure of what to do with this new information. To her, Jennie has always seemed outgoing and charismatic- it's hard to imagine her being anything but. Obviously she has some inner demons that Chaeyoung has no idea about. This knowledge leaves her feeling unnerved and wrong-footed. If Jennie is fighting an inner battle, Chaeyoung wants to help. She knows it's none of her business, yet Jennie has done so much for her so she wants to reciprocate. 

"I probably shouldn't have told you that," Jisoo adds quickly, appearing shifty. "Don't mention it to her. She'll probably tell you when the times right but-"

"It's okay, I won't."

They share an understanding smile, before making small talk until the other girls arrive. While Chaeyoung had a non-alcoholic cocktail over dinner, Jennie has brought her one with liquor in this time. Obviously the older girl isn't drinking because she's the designated driver but she told her friends not to stay sober on her account. Of course Lisa has already taken advantage of this.

"Have you ever heard of the expression 'functioning alcoholic'?" asks Jennie sardonically as her friend gulps half of her drink in one go. "I'm not letting you in my bed if you're going to be sick so slow it down."

Lisa smacks her lips cheekily in Jennie's direction which only makes her roll her eyes. By now she's used to her friends not taking her advice.

At the other end of the table, Chaeyoung doesn't feel like drinking at all. She wants to be sober tonight so she can talk to Jennie without worrying about making a fool of herself or forgetting it all in the morning. Nayeon's party was different because Jennie was drinking too, but if the older girl is forced to look after a drunk Chaeyoung then she would be horrified. She would never show her face again.

There is also a small part of her that wants the other girls to disappear into the crowd so she can spend some alone time with Jennie.

Chaeyoung deliberately sips her cocktail tediously slow. She's halfway through her first one whilst Lisa on her third one and Jisoo on her second. Jennie is still laboriously sipping her Diet Coke, looking around the bar in interest. She told Chaeyoung she had never been here before so she's quite fascinated, wondering how Lisa managed to find this place.

By now, the alcohol is starting to buzz in everyone's veins. Lisa asks the girls if they'll get up and dance with her, to which Jennie and Chaeyoung politely decline. Jisoo, much to everyone's surprise, agrees. She takes Lisa's hand and tugs her onto the dance floor, the younger girl looks like she's in hogs heaven. Jennie and Chaeyoung turn to each other with knowing smirks.

"Didn't I call it last night?" the older girl says triumphantly.

"I've got to say; at first I was skeptical but now I believe you. Did you see she's been looking at Jisoo all night?"

"Yes!" Jennie slaps her arm excitedly, not too hard to hurt her. "I'm so glad I'm not just imagining it."

"Maybe they wanted you to have a party so they could have some alone time," Chaeyoung wiggles her eyebrows suggestively and Jennie emits a snort.

"Ew! Don't go there!" Her giggles stop abruptly, suddenly looking serious. "I'm sorry I didn't mention the parties to you. Honestly, it didn't even cross my mind because it's so unimportant. The last one I had was like three years ago. I kinda hate parties anyway. I wasn't trying to keep it from you, I didn't even think-"

"It's fine, really," smiles Chaeyoung, wanting the girl to stop torturing yourself. "I think I would have declined the invite anyway because I'm all partied out at the moment. Going to a haunted house is _way_ more fun. And productive."

"Productive?" Jennie smiles.

"Yeah! If you had a party you'd only get drunk and forget it, you're not celebrating Halloween properly that way. But if you go to haunted house then you're getting into the spirit of things and getting scared!" Chaeyoung taps her temple as if she has just come up with a profound thought. Jennie cannot wipe the grin off her face even if she tried.

"You're one of a kind, Chaeyoung."

The younger girl blushes. "You keep saying that."

"Cause it's true. It's a good thing."

 _You're the only girl I want in this city,_ are the fragile words on the tip of Chaeyoung's tongue that she obviously cannot admit to. In fear of Jennie running a mile, she will have to take this secret to the grave.

It becomes increasingly difficult to talk over the music that keeps getting louder, so in the end they accept defeat and make their way over to the dance floor. Already, it's packed and the air is heavy with sweat. Chaeyoung wrinkles her nose in disgust. It's much less civilised than Nayeon's party, she feels less comfortable on the dance floor amongst complete strangers.

Because there is less alcohol in Chaeyoung's system, she's more reluctant to dance and let her hair down. She moves with stiff shoulders, constantly looking over her shoulder. She's heard all about what happens to girls in New York who get let their guard down and kidnapped or taken on nights out. Anyone in this bar could snatch her and take her away.

As the time passes, she slowly starts to become more confident. Perhaps it is because Jennie doesn't leave her side, though it is not as if the small girl could put up a fight if anything happened. But knowing she is close puts Chaeyoung at ease. At least someone is looking out for her.

"Are you okay?" Jennie calls over the noise every so often. Chaeyoung will nod and give her a thumbs up. Truthfully, she wishes she was wrapped up in a blanket watching movies or in bed. The party girl life doesn't suit her in the slightest, not when she is feeling the after effects of exhaustion from work. If she has to keep on dancing for much longer she feels like she may collapse in the middle of the dance floor.

When they eventually find Lisa and Jisoo, they return back to their booth to sit down and catch their breaths. Jisoo and Lisa are covered in a sheen of sweat that glitters underneath the strobe lights, making them look even more ethereal. Clearly they have been having more fun than Chaeyoung and Jennie, who have not even broken a sweat. They must be too old and boring to keep up with them. Something about knowing Jennie isn't interested in this scene either reassures Chaeyoung massively.

They've been in the bar for about an hour and a half before Jennie glances at her watch and realises time is dragging on far too slow for her liking. Without sounding antisocial, she just wants to be in bed. Or somewhere quieter with Chaeyoung.

"I think I'm going to go now," calls Jennie over the music. She has to tap Chaeyoung's shoulder and repeat herself before the younger girl hears her. "Do you want a ride home?"

Chaeyoung's shoulders go slack with relief. "Yes please. I need to get somewhere quiet before my head explodes. What about Jisoo and Lisa?"

"I'll text Jisoo and tell her I'm going. She has a house key so they can go back to my place, or I'll come pick them up later."

Chaeyoung nods, satisfied with the answer. Jisoo is sensible, she doesn't seem to want to get too drunk, so she will get her and Lisa home safely. Besides, by the time Jennie drops her off back home and comes back they will probably be ready to go home too. Or maybe not. Jennie's warning about Lisa partying until dawn rings loud in her head, causing her to shudder. Chaeyoung can't think of anything worse.

Jennie's car isn't parked too far away, but each step feels like agony in her heels. Jennie took the sensible approach and wore wedges, which Chaeyoung envies her for. Fortunately they don't have to traipse on the subways, so it isn't too bad. Once in the lobby of her apartment building Chaeyoung will take her shoes off.

Outside, the sudden silence echoes loudly in Chaeyoung's ears causing her to wince. There is an incessant ringing in her eardrums that causes her to stumble slightly. Jennie reaches out to catch her before any major damage is done, to which she thanks her with a weak smile. It's good to finally be out in the fresh air and out of the stifling atmosphere of the bar.

They collapse into Jennie's cool car, letting out loud sighs of relief. They catch each other's eye and begin giggling, basking in the silence and the calm for a short while. Chaeyoung's fingers itch on her lap to hold Jennie's hand over the gearbox, but then the older girl turns on the engine and the moment is lost.

Jennie begins driving back in the direction of the subway near Chaeyoung's house. The silence is not uncomfortable nor awkward. After the loudness of the bar, they feel like they deserve some quiet time. Chaeyoung rests her head against the seat, watching the city streak by the window. Even though she would consider it late, Manhattan is just waking up. The streets are packed with partygoers and the lines outside the nightclubs snake around the whole block. Music blares from somewhere, audible even in the car. Chaeyoung cranes her neck to get a better view, trying to take it all in. From her peripheral vision, Jennie watches her with a soft smile.

As they get nearer to the subway station, the lump in Chaeyoung's throat gets larger. She doesn't want to say goodbye to Jennie just yet, desperate to spend the rest of the night with her. Is her proposition going to be too forward? Will Jennie reject her? Is it worth it?

"I live on Cornelia Street," Chaeyoung blurts before she has made her mind up. "You can come round for a bit. If-if you want."

For a few seconds, Jennie is silent. Chaeyoung's heart threatens to explode out of her ribs with the tension, her stomach coiled in painfully tight knots.

"I'd love to," Jennie replies, unable to repress the wide smile threatening to crack open her face. "Just tell me where to go."

Chaeyoung melts into the seat, feeling all the pressure leave her shoulders. She can't believe that worked. Yet, at the same time, there was a small part of her knew that Jennie wouldn't turn her down. They have to start somewhere. And if this gets the wheels of motion turning then Chaeyoung is all for it.

"This is a nice place," remarks Jennie as they get closer to the apartment building. "So quaint. I'd love to live here."

It's worlds away from Jennie's flashy apartment block, yet Chaeyoung agrees. She wouldn't change Cornelia Street for anything. It feels more like home to her than anywhere else in the world. She could happily live here until the end of her days.

"But guess what the best part is?" Chaeyoung teases, causing Jennie to actually take her eyes off the road for a split second, her interest piqued. "We have an indoor pool in the basement."

"What?" Jennie gasps. "Okay I'm sold. Do you need a roommate? I don't make any mess, I promise."

Chaeyoung laughs breathily. "It _does_ get a little lonely..."

From then on, she has to navigate Jennie into the parking lot which is difficult because the street is so narrow. But, like with everything else, Jennie keeps a calm head and they park the car up without any major incident. This time, Chaeyoung's feet don't hurt when she's walking. She feels so light like she's floating into the night sky, to become one with the twinkling stars and the half moon that hangs lethargically. Jennie struggles to keep up with her long strides, her legs are considerably shorter than Chaeyoung's. It's hard not to stare in awe at the younger girls long, slim legs that would put a supermodel to shame. Every part of her body is so beautifully proportioned it's like she was sculpted from marble. Jennie cannot believe how lucky she is as nerves rise in her throat at the prospect of entering Chaeyoung's home.

It feels so personal, to step foot where Chaeyoung lives. Yet it will also give Jennie a better understanding of the girl, it will get their relationship moving along so she cannot complain. Although she had hoped the younger girl would one day invite her round, she didn't want to push it. Apparently she felt the same all along.

The lobby is empty but Jennie expected it to be. It's getting late after all, and by all accounts the majority of Chaeyoung's neighbours are elderly people. Jennie is dying to know how Chaeyoung managed to afford such a luxurious starter home in one of the most expensive cities in the world, but reckons she will be pushing it if she inquires about it. Jennie has yet to fully explain her financial situation to her, so she can hardly begrudge Chaeyoung for keeping an air of privacy.

Chaeyoung's apartment is Number Thirteen which is on the second floor. They could easily walk it, but their feet are killing them so they take the elevator. Chaeyoung leans against the metal wall, taking some of the pressure off her feet. Jennie mirrors her action, which the younger girl catches onto and begins laughing.

"Please excuse the place," Chaeyoung says as they walk down the hall. "I haven't had the chance to renovate it properly yet. I promise I'm getting round to it."

"Chaeyoung," Jennie stops in the middle of the hall, looking up at her. "You don't have to apologise and explain. I'm sure it'll be perfect."

Nervously, Chaeyoung nods and unlocks the front door.


	6. six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so i know this story is, like, ridiculously long but 1) i adore this au and im so attached to it its unreal 2) im trying to write my first full length novel and this story is my first attempt! so yeah, thanks for sticking with me. i know its a lot :)

Jennie steps inside the apartment behind Chaeyoung and shuts the door. When the lights flicker on, she takes a moment to look around and become familiarised with the place. The lounge is small yet cosy, practically filled wall to wall with mismatched furniture and a scrubbed hardwood floor that all somehow comes together perfectly. The place just screams Chaeyoung. There is no wonder the dreamy-eyed girl fell in love with the place. Jennie has been here less than a minute and is already enamoured.

"I love it," the older girl says with a grin. "It's so homely." She takes a tentative step forward, running her hand along the back of the couch while Chaeyoung watches her with antsy eyes, wondering if she is simply lying to make her feel better. While Chaeyoung loves the place, Jennie is used to the finer things in life and her apartment is probably ten times the size of Cornelia Street and much more sleek and modern too. The younger girl waits on baited breath.

"Did you do all this decorating?"

"No," Chaeyoung blows out a stream of air she didn't know she h ad been holding in so tightly. "The whole place came decorated which was a relief. Apart from the bathroom but I'm still deciding what to do with it. The previous tenants left some of their older furniture they didn't want to take so it's a mixture of half of their stuff and mine. But I think it works."

Jennie nods softly. "It really does. I love it. Can I see the rest?" She tries not to sound too eager, but this is exactly what Chaeyoung needs to hear. With a shy nod, Chaeyoung leads her around the rest of the apartment. It doesn't take long- all of five minutes- because the place is fairly small but as each room is unveiled, Jennie's reactions seem genuinely enthusiastic as she asks Chaeyoung many questions. The younger girl soon comes to realise that she isn't feigning this at all; she really _is_ interested.

Jennie surprises her more and more every day.

She feels oddly intimate showing Jennie her bedroom, the implications of it make her cheeks heat up slightly. Thankfully the older girl doesn't seem to notice, cautiously stepping inside and looking at the framed photographs on Chaeyoung's dresser as the girl explains every single one. Jennie picks up the photo of Chaeyoung and Alice dressed up as flower girls at their cousins wedding and proclaims this to be her favourite. Without knowing, she picked Chaeyoung's favourite too.

"Do you want to watch a movie?" Chaeyoung asks as they retreat back into the lounge. "By the time it finishes you should be able to pick Jisoo and Lisa up."

"Sure," nods Jennie, trying to ignore how rapidly her heartbeat has picked up. "What do you want to watch?"

"You can choose. I have Netflix. I'm going to go and get changed because my heels are killing me." The younger girl massages her ankle theatrically as she slips off her heels and pads into her bedroom, humming under her breath. The situation is so domestic and wholesome that it takes all of Jennie's strength to not fall too head over heels. It could be like this all the time with Chaeyoung- Jennie has quickly learnt she wants it to be this way- she could spend endless nights in Chaeyoung's homey apartment snuggled on the couch with her watching movies.

She's scrolling through the movie section on Netflix when Chaeyoung pops her head around the doorway.

"I have a robe you can borrow," Chaeyoung offers. "It's more comfortable, is all."

"Okay." Jennie looks up with a smile. "I'll borrow a robe. Thank you very much."

The younger girl disappears again before coming back with a fluffy white robe, which she hands Jennie bashfully. The girl's eyes flicker down Chaeyoung's body who is dressed in an identical robe but in grey, her feet covered by extravagant flamingo slippers. She cannot help but burst out laughing. If anyone else was to wear the ensemble they would simply look ridiculous but Chaeyoung looks so endearing it makes her heart physically ache. To masquerade her true feelings, Jennie just giggles. Thus causing Chaeyoung to flush bright red and begin protesting how the slippers were a goodbye gift from Chanyeol and they're fashionable, right?

"Of course," Jennie giggles, standing up to leave the room. "I wish I had a pair myself."

"I'll get him to bring you some over!" she calls as Jennie slips out of the lounge. Chaeyoung leans back into the couch, feeling contentment warming her to the very core. Although the nerves practically tore her in half, she's glad she managed to work up the nerve to invite Jennie in. She can't think of a better way to spend her night. And many others, if all goes well.

When Jennie emerges in the robe, it is Chaeyoung's turn to laugh. Although their height difference doesn't seem significant when they are side by side, apparently it is judging by the way the robe trails on the floor as opposed to above Jennie's ankles. Nonetheless, she looks utterly adorable. Before, Chaeyoung had always thought Jennie was attractive and sexy, never has she seen her look this _cute_. Like all she wants to do is squeeze her cheeks and kiss her forehead endlessly.

"Laugh all you want," the older girl sits down heavily on the couch, wrapping her arms around herself. "You're just jealous I can pull this off without the slippers."

"Right. You got me," Chaeyoung giggles. "Just you wait. When they're too big for your tiny feet then _I'll_ be the one laughing."

"Hey!" protests Jennie. "My feet are not _tiny_!"

The younger girl rolls her eyes playfully. "Of course not, Big Foot." With a laugh, Jennie shoves her shoulder playfully before momentarily resting her head there. Chaeyoung freezes, attempting to swallow around the large lump formulating in her throat. She's never had this much contact with Jennie before and her body is reacting accordingly. She just prays the older girl can't hear her heart.

"You're so funny, Chae," she says, sighing a little. "I picked a movie. Have you seen To All The Boys I've Loved Before?"

"Yes!" Chaeyoung bolts upright, slapping the couch excitedly, accidentally knocking Jennie away. "I love that movie, it's one of my favourites!"

"Oh good," Jennie snuggles down under the blanket Chaeyoung brought through with the robe. "Because I haven't seen it. If it gets too complicated you'll have to help me."

Chaeyoung wriggles underneath the blanket too. "It's pretty easy to follow but I've got you, don't worry."

With Chaeyoung so close to her, how could she?

Jennie deliberately chose the movie because she knows it will be lighthearted and simple, a movie she doesn't have to have a lot of concentration to follow. She spends most of her time glancing sideways at Chaeyoung who is engrossed. Every so often they will shuffle closer to one another, but so discreetly it is like they never moved. A few times Jennie almost reaches out to put her arm around her but refrains. They've already taken huge bounds tonight and she doesn't want to push it.

At one point in the movie, where the main character and love interest are about to walk into a party, Chaeyoung begins mouthing the script along with them. A testament as to just how much she has watched this movie. Seeing her do this is so captivating that Jennie can't take her eyes off of her. Chaeyoung loves so purely and wholeheartedly, unabashed and unashamed to be her real self and bear her soul to those and that she loves; it's commendable. And so rare. Jennie cannot believe she happened to run into such an incredible person by chance on the subway that fateful day. Even though it's only been one month, she can't imagine life without Chaeyoung. The younger girl has well and truly wormed her way into her life. Instead of being terrified, Jennie yearns for even more.

At some point, in between trying to keep up with the plot of the movie and watching Chaeyoung, Jennie drops asleep. Chaeyoung sees her head lolling in her peripheral vision, smiling slightly to herself. Instead of feeling offended, she understands; it's one am and of course she's exhausted, it's been a long day. For Jennie's sake she hopes her friends call her soon or she'll be crashing on Chaeyoung's sofa for the night.

Would Chaeyoung make her sleep on the sofa or would she invite her into her bedroom? The mere thought of sharing her bed with Jennie is enough to set her skin alight and flood her mind with thoughts that she really does not want to be thinking right now. Not when the girl in question is so innocently asleep by her side. Chaeyoung feels gross and perverted for even entertaining these thoughts, shrinking in on herself as she tries to follow the movie but she has lost the thread.

It makes it worse when Jennie flops over completely, her head on Chaeyoung's lap. The girl freezes in place, stunned. She wonders if it's worth waking Jennie up to move her, then quickly realises this would be cruel. She probably won't get a lot of sleep for the rest of the night if she has to take care of her drunk best friends so Chaeyoung allows her this. It isn't that she is uncomfortable, but she doesn't want Jennie to wake up and be horrified once she realises where she has woken up.

Eventually, Chaeyoung's eyes begin to droop too. With the television playing quietly in the background and the heavy, warm weight of Jennie's head on her lap, she is lulled to sleep. Before she falls asleep completely, her hands find Jennie's hair which she threads through her fingers for comfort before dozing off.

A while later, both girls are ripped from their peaceful sleep by the shrill screeching of Jennie's cellphone ringing. Both girls sit upright in shock, blinking with bleary eyes at one another for explanation. They don't have much time to realise what has happened before Jennie is grabbing her phone off the coffee table and answering without giving it a second glance.

"Hello?" she asks, voice thick with sleep. Chaeyoung slumps back, her eyes fluttering shut. "Yeah, I'll be there. Give me like fifteen minutes."

Jennie disconnects the call, yawning and stretching. She knuckles her eyes and Chaeyoung fights the urge to kiss her.

"That was Jisoo. They're waiting for me." She glances up at the clock and sees its three am. "I had no idea it was so late. I just want to go back to sleep," she whines. "Shall I pretend I never answered?"

"Yes," mumbles Chaeyoung sleepily. "Stay here forever."

While the offer is incredibly tempting, especially once it's come out of Chaeyoung's mouth, Jennie knows she can't leave her friends. She has a responsibility as the sober friend to look after them, knowing full well how dangerous Manhattan can be to drunk and vulnerable girls. Chaeyoung will be fine, she can go to bed and forget it all happened in the morning. Although the thought of this hurts Jennie considerably, perhaps it will be for the best.

Quickly, Jennie sheds the robe and leaves it folded up neatly on Chaeyoung's bed and gets dressed again. When she walks into the lounge she's surprised to see the younger girl is stood up, looking quite anxious and alert.

"Text me when you get home, okay?" Her voice sounds terse. "It can be really dangerous."

"Don't worry, Chae," Jennie smiles softly. "I will. It'll be fine. I've done this loads of times."

Chaeyoung frowns. "That doesn't mean you're indestructible. Just... be careful. Please."

Once they exchange goodbyes, Jennie makes her way sleepily down the hall and into the elevator. She still feels half asleep, though when Chaeyoung hugged her goodbye she perked up considerably. It isn't the first time they've hugged, yet after tonight it felt more meaningful. Like there was more weight behind it.

A little bravery goes a long way.

Jennie gets into her car, shivering slightly. By now she feels perkier, able to drive safely to meet her friends. She just prays they haven't drunkenly wandered off as it will prove impossible to find them in Manhattan on a busy Saturday night. As she starts the engine, she longs to be back in Chaeyoung's apartment, curled up on her sofa peacefully asleep. Jennie doesn't remember how she fell asleep but when she woke up, it seemed she had been resting on Chaeyoung's lap. Somehow, she can't find it in her to be embarrassed. If it helps get the message across to the younger girl then she doesn't mind. Besides, it wasn't completely one sided; she can briefly remember Chaeyoung gently massaging her scalp at some point.

Her cheeks burn as she relives it all in her mind. She's glad it's dark so her friends will not see the peony shade in her face. Undoubtedly she will have little time to dwell on it for the rest of the night in between taking care of her friends and ensuring they stay out of mischief. Particularly with Lisa this can be a strenuous task.

Pulling up outside of the club, Jennie spots her friends straight away. She squints through the dark when she sees them chatting to someone, it's hard to make out who they are or what they look like. Obviously they have not spotted her yet and Jisoo's phone remains in her pocket despite Jennie trying to ring her and text; so the girl sees no option but to storm out and get them herself.

As she crosses the road, she sees the person they're stood with is a boy which piques her interest. Neither of her friends swing that way, so to see them with a man is slightly baffling. Unless he is dangerous, offering or proposing something formidable.

Jennie clears her throat which garners their attention. Both of them look up at her, their faces lighting up when they register she's arrived. Lisa lurches forward to encase her in a hug and plants a sloppy kiss on her cheek, making Jennie grimace and gently push her away. The whole time the boy has been watching them with a slight smile on his face that looks surprisingly innocuous.

"This is Baekhyun," Jisoo gestures to the boy, who waves jauntily at Jennie. "We've been talking to him all night."

"Have you now?" Jennie arches her eyebrows unscrupulously in his direction. Instead of shrinking under her glare, he simply smiles.

"They've been telling me about your girlfriend and how she's looking for some gigs. I said I wanted to meet her and see if she wanted a slot here."

Jennie chokes, feeling her windpipe close severely. "My _girlfriend_?" The daggers she glares at her friend's would be enough to kill lesser men than them, but they take it on the chin with oblivious, drunken smiles. "I- no. No, she isn't my girlfriend and she isn't looking for a gig at your club. Thanks but no thanks," she replies curtly, wrapping her fingers painfully tight around Jisoo's bicep and beginning to drag her away.

"Wait!" Baekhyun calls. "Give her this. Tell her to think about it." Out of his jacket pocket, he produces a small, laminate business card. Jennie almost crams it down his throat but takes it reluctantly in hopes he will leave them alone if she accepts. Once Baekhyun is out of sight, she begins hauling her friends away who whine and protest she is being too rough.

"I can't believe you would do that!" she explodes once in the car, slamming her hands against the steering wheel. "Why would you tell him that?"

"We're just trying to help Chaeyoung!" Lisa argues, seeming much more sober now. "She said it was a good idea earlier!"

"Yeah, since you're so reluctant to help her."

"I'm not!" Jennie snaps, losing her temper. "I'm not reluctant to help her. You know it isn't that!" 

"Then what is it?" Jisoo pries, leaning forward to stick her head in between the driver and passenger seats. Lisa managed to call shotgun before she did. "Why won't you tell her?"

The girl breathes heavily through her nose, trying to bring some clarity back into her mind. Her hands are trembling slightly as they grip the wheel so tightly her knuckles turn white. Lisa eyes her warily, unsure of whether she will explode again. Jisoo is the one pushing her tonight, which is uncommon. Usually she is the more sensible out of the two.

"I don't want her to be involved," is all Jennie says quietly. "She's too good for it."

"She's a grown woman."

Doesn't Jisoo think Jennie knows that? Does she not think the self and same thought crosses her mind at _least_ one hundred times a day? Does she not realise that the knowledge eats away at Jennie's insides as the urge to tell her gets more overwhelming as each day passes? Jisoo seems to be under the delusion that Jennie is being selfish and trying to hold her back for her own selfish means, which couldn't be further from the truth. She's trying to protect Chaeyoung because she cares about her so much.

Jennie begins driving in silence, a stony and frigid atmosphere fills the car like a tomb. Lisa sits sombrely in the front seat, her hands clasped in her lap as she twiddles her thumbs anxiously. Jisoo sits in the back with her legs and arms folded determinedly, her jaw set hard. Arguing with Jisoo is a juxtaposition to arguing with Lisa; the younger girl forgives and forgets at the drop of the hat, her nature too sweet and loving to stay angry for too long. Jisoo, on the other hand, can hold a grudge for as long as she lives; the anger inside her only turning more bitter and poisonous as each day passes. Jennie knows her and Jisoo's friendship is not over, it will take more than a silly disagreement like this to throw away over two decades of loyalty to one another; but right now Jennie wants nothing more than to send her off on a flight and not see her face for a few weeks.

She doesn't tell them about being at Chaeyoung's place. It seems tactless to mention it.

When they arrive at Jennie's apartment, none of them have spoken a word. Even Lisa, for all her bumbling, knows that she can't break the ice during this troubling time. She keeps her head down, surprisingly somber considering she has been partying all night. Part of Jennie feels guilty to have spoiled their night, yet feels like she is allowed to feel indignant for what they did. _Said_. Perhaps it is the knowledge that they called Chaeyoung her girlfriend when she is nowhere close that annoyed Jennie the most. Even then, she isn't particularly angry at them for this; more at herself for being such a coward.

Once inside, Lisa lingers awkwardly in Jennie's bedroom doorway. Jisoo is setting up a bed on the sofa while Jennie is sitting at her vanity taking her makeup off with a stony countenance. The younger girl chews her lip, torn. Who is she supposed to side with in times like this?

She scuttles into Jennie's room which makes Jisoo tut and roll her eyes. Of course Princess Jennie would get her own way. Then she stops herself short, surprised at what a poisonous thought that creeped into her mind. Truthfully, Jennie is more annoyed than she is. Jisoo is just confused as to why Jennie is keeping this huge secret, although she would never admit it she thinks her best friend is being slightly selfish but it is her prerogative after all. It's not Jisoo's place to tell Chaeyoung.

"Jen," the youngest girl whines. "I think you should talk to Jisoo."

Jennie fixes her with a flat stare, alerting her she is very much not about to crack first. With a sigh, Lisa goes into the lounge to begin bargaining with Jisoo. Jennie is pulling on her pyjamas when Lisa enters the bedroom with Jisoo in tow, her head hanging looking meek.

"I'm sorry, Jen," the oldest girl mumbles, not quite making eye contact.

Jennie smiles tiredly, too exhausted to keep up this bitter back and forth. "It's okay. Let's just forget about it." Every time they quarrel, they recite this line afterwards to ensure there are no hard feelings. It is like these words are magic, causing them to forget everything that happened between them. In the morning, their argument will be forgotten.

They crawl into bed, Lisa in the middle, she wiggles around and giggles; thankful her friends have made up. She hates being caught in the midst of them when they get like this. Usually she tries her best to avoid it but tonight she had no choice.

While Jisoo and Lisa drift off, Jennie remains wide awake. Reaching over carefully, she grabs her phone off her beside table to text Chaeyoung to let her know she's in bed safely. She doesn't expect a response, assuming the younger girl has gone to sleep considering how late it is. However, almost immediately after her text is delivered, her phone vibrates.

**Chaeyoung (3:43am): i was getting worried but i'm glad you're safe. sweet dreams x**

***

Jennie wakes late and does paperwork for the remainder of the morning and into the afternoon. Jisoo and Lisa go off for brunch at noon while Jennie politely declines their offer. It's obvious in the way Jisoo's expression falters that she wonders whether they are still on unresolved terms, but Jennie assures her it's nothing personal and that she's swamped with work. Once satisfied with her answer, both girls bid her goodbye and leave in peace.

She's in the middle of wondering what to make for dinner when her phone begins ringing. Although it's been by her side all morning she hasn't spared it a second glance. She checked it once in the morning to see if Chaeyoung had text her but she hadn't, Jennie just assumed she was still in bed which was understandable. Most sane people would be after a late night. It's Chaeyoung who is ringing her.

"Hey," her voice sounds bright on the other end. Jennie cannot help but smile. "Are you busy?"

Jennie glances down at her paperwork that she has slowly been working through. Technically she isn't finished yet, but she can make up for it tomorrow in the office. Things have been slow since the Fletchford case was resolved.

"Nope. What's up?"

"I know it sounds weird but... I kind of want to go to the pet store." Jennie can almost picture Chaeyoung biting her lip at this admittance.

"The pet store?"

"Yeah. It gets kind of lonely in my apartment and I wanted to get a pet."

"Okay, sure. Shall I come and pick you up?"

Chaeyoung squeals excitedly. "Please! I need to get dressed but I should be ready by the time you get here."

They bid one another goodbye and Jennie rushes into her bedroom to change into a more respectable outfit and dab on some makeup. Purple rings sag underneath her eyes and even concealer can't help her today. She's too tired to make any more effort, so grabs her keys and purse off the side and hurries down the hallway. If anyone called her out for being enthusiastic at the prospect of Chaeyoung she would protest until she turned blue in the face, but there is a fluttering in her stomach and excitement rising in her chest at the prospect of seeing her so soon after last night. Will things have changed for the better?

Chaeyoung is stood outside of her building when Jennie gets there which is a disappointment as she wanted to go into her apartment again. The younger girl offers her a refreshing smile when she gets into the car, which causes the butterflies lining Jennie's stomach lining to flutter aggressively.

"A pet, huh?" Jennie asks, reversing out. "It's not a cat you want, is it?"

Chaeyoung giggles. "No. I'm can't have dogs or cats in my lease, but I'm allowed small pets."

"What are you thinking?"

"I don't really know. Something fluffy, maybe. Something I can cuddle. Like..."

"A guinea pig?" offers Jennie.

"Yeah! Don't you have to get them in pairs, though? Maybe not. A rabbit would be better."

A rabbit. Somehow Jennie can picture that. Chaeyoung with a grey rabbit on her lap, curled up on the sofa watching TV as Jennie comes in from a long day at work. Chaeyoung will lean up and greet her with a kiss and the rabbit will wiggle its nose in a greeting. The vision is so domestic and wholesome that Jennie finds herself quite lost in the fantasy. She sees her and Chaeyoung moving into a townhouse and getting a dog (and a cat, to sate Chaeyoung) and having a whole menagerie of other pets.

She quickly snaps out of it when Chaeyoung begins giving her directions to the nearest pet store. As she focuses intently on the road she is painfully aware of the burn in her cheeks. In times like this, she is always terrified Chaeyoung is a mindreader and can see what she is thinking. So far she seems oblivious.

Jennie parks up outside and the younger girl is bounding out before Jennie has even unclipped her seatbelt. The older girl rolls her eyes fondly as she follows Chaeyoung inside, who has already made her way over to the acne-riddled boy at the counter who looked half asleep before two pretty girls entered the shop. Jennie's skin crawls at the way his eyes rake up and down Chaeyoung's body, beady gaze lingering on her bare legs which are on show due to the fact she's wearing a tennis skirt. Jennie makes a show of standing so close to Chaeyoung that their arms brush and she sends pointed glares at the young boy.

"What's wrong?" Chaeyoung whispers as they turn to look at the animals. Jennie can practically feel the boy's gaze burning holes in them.

"That creep was checking you out," Jennie replies gruffly, intent on not making a big deal about it. Chaeyoung says nothing, but feels warmth creeping up her stomach. Knowing Jennie is- is it correct to assume she's jealous?- makes her feel slightly giddy. The older girl _must_ care for her in order to feel like this.

Chaeyoung browses the rabbits carefully, deliberating over each one. There is an old one the store recently adopted because his even older owner died. There is a young one with floppy ears and a twitchy nose that she falls in love with. Along the next cage, there is a brown one that is stretched across the expanse of its cage and snoozes, blissfully unaware. However, when she sees the size of even the smallest cage Chaeyoung balks, realising that there is no way it's going to fit in her apartment. And she would feel too bad making it live in a cramped cage considering it would be in there most of the day while she was at work.

With a defeated sigh, she turns to Jennie. "I don't think I can get one. The cages are way too big."

"Why don't you look at something else?" reasons Jennie. The younger girl peers at the ferret cage but when one hisses at her, she leaps back in fear, terrified it is going to bite her. Jennie wrinkles her nose up in disgust. She's always hated rodents, their teeth are too sharp and their eyes too ominous. In a way it is a relief Chaeyoung can't get a rabbit because Jennie wouldn't want to be too near it.

The younger girl drifts to the other end of the pet store, walking deliberately slow to try and get a look at all the animals on offer. Jennie shrieks slightly in surprise as she walks past a tarantula cage. From then on, she loses her enthusiasm about pet shopping.

When Chaeyoung spots the large fish tank spanning half the length of one of the walls, she gasps and hurries over straight away. Jennie has to jog slightly to keep up with her. The younger girl has her hand pressed against the glass, eyes wide as she watches the fish flit around in the water. Jennie has to admit, they all look very pretty and colourful. Perhaps a fish would be a good substitute for Chaeyoung. Easy to look after and don't take up a lot of room.

"They're all so pretty," she pouts. "How can I pick one?"

Jennie watches, her eyes following a crimson red fish. "What about this one?"

"I had a red fish back home and it died so I don't want to get another one like it. I'd feel like I was replacing it." Only Chaeyoung would feel guilty about replacing something as insignificant as a pet fish. It warms Jennie's heart as she feels herself falling even more for the younger girl- if that was even possible.

"Oh!" she gasps suddenly, freezing. "I like this one!" Chaeyoung's fingertips tap the glass to point out an orange fish with a fat head and large eyes. As far as looks go, it's hardly endearing. Yet the girl seems endeared by it, so Jennie goes over to the boy who eyes her warily and tells him that Chaeyoung wants to buy the fish.

It's a complete rigmarole purchasing the right tank, pebbles and water filter because it's a tropical fish, they apparently take more looking after than normal fish. Chaeyoung seems undeterred, proudly telling the boy she's kept tropical fish before so she knows what she's doing. Jennie cannot help but smile.

Chaeyoung spends an even longer time selecting the right things to go in its tank, choosing neon pink pebbles and an ornate castle and treasure chest for it to play with (do fish even _play_? Jennie wonders) and some straggly weeds for it to hide in. When they leave the store forty minutes later, Chaeyoung has a smile so wide that it threatens to crack her visage.

They haul the tank and heavy bags into the back of Jennie's car while Chaeyoung lovingly holds the bag which contains the fish on her lap, talking to it and telling it its going to a new home.

"You had fish back home?" questions Jennie conversationally, remembering what she said earlier.

"Two. Red and Orange." She smiles sheepishly when Jennie looks at her. "Very original, I know. I want to give this one a better name but I can't think."

"Clementine? Peach? Apricot? Carrot? Tangerine?"

Chaeyoung rolls her eyes. "Ha ha. Aren't you hilarious?"

Natural silence lapses over them as Jennie concentrates on driving while Chaeyoung cradles the fish close to her chest as one would with a newborn baby. Jennie does her best to hide her smile. The way Chaeyoung is treating such an unappealing and unexciting animal such as a fish is commendable, really. And adorable. Though the older girl would never admit to finding it so.

Once they arrive at Chaeyoung's apartment, the older girl hurries off to unlock the door and prepare her apartment for the new arrival. Jennie follows behind, hauling two heavy, plastic bags on either arm; the tank will have to wait until both of them are able to carry it in.

Stepping into Chaeyoung's apartment again gives Jennie a thrill that sets her blood abuzz with adrenaline. For a moment, she stands in Chaeyoung's kitchen where the younger girl told her to dump everything, looking around with a smile. She could get used to frequenting this place more often, especially on the long, cold winter nights that are quickly approaching. Images of her and Chaeyoung curled on the couch under a blanket flash in her mind, causing a warm sense of satisfaction to flood in her stomach.

However, she doesn't have long to dwell on this because Chaeyoung will soon be wondering where she is. Jennie has to scurry out back down to her car where the younger girl is struggling to navigate the tank out of her trunk.

It takes the best part of fifteen minutes, multiple breaks and a shriek from Chaeyoung when she fears the tank is going to land on her foot; but, eventually, they manage to get it into the kitchen where they immediately begin to start setting the equipment up. The nameless fish is settled in the sink the plastic bag, and if Jennie didn't know any better, she would say it looks almost curious about it's new surroundings. It keeps swimming to the top of the bag and peering over the waterline with its disconcertingly beady eyes.

"Have you thought of a name yet?" inquires Jennie, leaning against the countertop as they wait for the water to be treated.

"I'm not sure," Chaeyoung doesn't take her eyes off the tank. Jennie had no idea setting up a tropical fish tank was such strenuous work. "What about... Peach?"

Jennie snorts. "Come on, Chaeyoung."

"Okay, okay!" The younger girl goes silent again, eyebrows knitted together in concentration as she nibbles her lip. She's quiet for a few minutes until she has finished setting up the filter, slotting it into the tank triumphantly. "Joohwang!"

"That's just orange in Korean!" the older girl laughs. "But... it actually works. I like it." She makes her way over to the sink, bending down so she's eye level with the fish that appears to be eyeing her reproachfully. "What do you think? Do you like the name Joohwang?"

The fish flicks its tail, that could either be in appreciation or contempt. Either way, it appears to be settled now. Joohwang it is.

***

**Chaeyoung (9:37pm): joohwang is asleep :)**

**Jennie (9:37pm): can fish sleep??**

**Chaeyoung (9:37pm): yes. don't hurt his feelings :(**

**Jennie (9:38pm): okay tell him i'm sorry :(**

**Chaeyoung (9:38pm): jennie he's asleep.**

**Jennie (9:40pm): sorry, i forgot he needs his beauty sleep. hopefully he won't be ugly when you wake up tomorrow x**

**Chaeyoung (9:43pm): JENNIE!**

***

As Halloween approaches, Chaeyoung finds herself completely embroiled in the festivities. She hasn't looked forward to Halloween since she was a child, she hasn't celebrated it since her last year in college when she attended a fancy dress sorority. She went as Catwoman while her best friend went as a sexy Joker (it looked a lot better than it sounds.)

At work, Jeongyeon has them baking a variety of spooky goods. Chaeyoung and Seungwan spend all morning icing ghost shaped biscuits and making pumpkin pie. Sooyoung is in charge of making cookie monsters, while Dahyun allocates herself the role as head decorator- which the girls all know is a convenient excuse to get out of the swelteringly hot kitchen. She drapes pumpkin chains around the window, sticks fake cobwebs onto the glass display cases, and puts a bowlful of candy on the counter where if a customer sticks their hand in a ghoulish hand will reach out and grab them. Much to many customers surprise. One old lady almost has a heart attack when she gets grabbed, she clutches her chest in fright and Dahyun has to make her a cup of tea and apologise profusely for her stupid prank.

Jennie tries to get in the spirit too. She decorates her cubicle with an electric skeleton that dances if you press a button, which Taehyung loves setting off just to embarrass her. One time she catches Nayeon doing it sneakily, but doesn't call her friend up on it. These days she's too happy to engage in petty squabbles with her friend.

One afternoon while Jennie is typing up a dreary report that she has long since lost focus on, she receives a text from Chaeyoung asking if she'd like to have a movie night at her apartment. Jennie is typing out an enthusiastic yes before she has even finished reading the whole text. If she thought her concentration was poor before, it becomes even worse after that. All she can think about is her night with Chaeyoung, making her squirm restlessly in her seat. She tries to maintain a neutral expression as not to arouse suspicion, but of course Nayeon eyes her warily and asks what's got her panties in a twist.

Jennie doesn't reply, simply pretending she hasn't heard her.

By the time four o clock comes, Jennie grabs her coat and purse and is flying out of the office before anyone has had a chance to bid her goodbye. Joohyun and Nayeon exchange knowing looks, rolling their eyes slightly. But there is no malice behind their actions.

Meanwhile, Chaeyoung is in the middle of the supermarket panicking over what snacks to buy. Despite having known Jennie for this long and having dinner with her more times than she can count, Chaeyoung still doesn't know the mundane little details about her; what her favourite snacks are, what her favourite perfume is, if she's an early bird or a night owl, or what her favourite childhood memory is. It makes Chaeyoung feel even more guilty for having such strong feelings for her, without knowing any of the crucial things.

In the end, she buys popcorn, two different types of chips, candy corn (there's a high probability Jennie won't like it but Chaeyoung loves it nonetheless) and some Hersheys. She practically skips home, feeling elation growing with her at each step.

When she gets home, she lights a few candles, tidies up the lounge and is left with just enough time to quickly get changed. Chaeyoung is just pulling her leg through her leggings when she hears a knock on the door. Surprisingly, she manages to maintain her composure and hurry up without falling over and breaking her floor-length mirror.

Her heart constricts when she sees Jennie stood on the other side of the door, dressing in an oversized hoodie that drowns her and sweatpants. The older girl looks slightly sheepish.

"My office clothes weren't comfy so I had to run home and get changed. I hope I'm not too late."

"Not at all!" Chaeyoung pushes her hair out of her face, feeling her heart rate spike slightly. She's never seen Jennie look so cute, she just wants to hold the girl and never let her go. Somehow, Jennie manages to look far more delicate, more easily hurt. It's refreshing, actually. It reminds Chaeyoung that she's only human too.

"I brought wine too," the older girl lifts up the bottle Chaeyoung hadn't even registered. "I didn't know if you'd like it..." Her voice trails off awkwardly.

"I love it," she grins, taking it out of her hands. "Thank you, Jen."

The older girl notices the use of the nickname, but doesn't question it. She doesn't want to ruin the moment.

Chaeyoung invites her to make herself at home on the couch, which has been attractively draped with blankets at fluffy pillows. When Jennie sees how much effort Chaeyoung has put into it she just wants to cry.

"Would you like a glass?" she calls from the kitchen.

"No thanks, I'm driving," replies Jennie, tentatively sitting down on the edge of the sofa. She doesn't want to ruin all of Chaeyoung's hard work.

A few minutes later the younger girl emerges laden down with snacks. Jennie springs up to help her, feeling guilty for not even offering to help out in the kitchen. When she apologises, Chaeyoung brushes it off with a breathy laugh.

"Oh, you got Hersheys!" exclaims Jennie. "These are my favourite."

Chaeyoung turns to her, suddenly serious. "I need to know your opinion on candy corn. It's vitally important."

She shrugs. "I'm impartial to it. It's... okay."

The younger girl grins. "That's good enough for me. What movie do you want to watch?"

After scrolling through the horror selection and playfully squabbling over what to watch, they settle on _The Woman In Black_. Jennie remembers watching it a century ago with one of her college friends, but it has been so long since that she's forgotten the plot. Which is just as well because it was what Chaeyoung really wanted to watch- Jennie would never dream of not letting her get her own way.

Jennie tries to pay attention to the plot, but it proves difficult when Chaeyoung is only inches away from her underneath the fluffy blanket. She tries not to focus on the feeling of the younger girl's body heat, keeping her eyes focused on the television screen; but she's well aware she's blushing. It's a relief that they're sat in the dark with only the candles emitting a dim light.

Jennie has never been bothered by horror movies, even when she was younger. Whenever they watched them at slumber parties, her peers would be wide awake all night with fear while Jennie slept soundly, completely unaffected. She didn't have Chaeyoung down for a scaredy-cat, but is utterly endeared when she discovers she _is_.

The younger girl clutches the blanket, holding it close to her face as she watches the movie with wide eyes. Whenever there is a jump scare or ominous music begins to play, Chaeyoung will pull the blanket over her eyes so she doesn't have to watch it. Jennie stifles her laughter, unable to stop stealing glances at the younger girl who seems petrified.

"We can put Disney Channel on if you're too scared," Jennie smirks. Chaeyoung jumps at the sudden sound of her voice, sending her a glare.

"I'm not _scared_!" she protests, then shrieks in horror when a scary scene catches her off guard. She ducks behind the blanket quickly which causes Jennie to bend double with laughter.

"You don't have to lie to me, Chae," she grins. "I think I saw _My Little Pony_ on here if you'd rather watch that..."

"Stop!" the younger girl whines, pouting. "It's just... been a while since I watched a horror movie, that's all."

Jennie rolls her eyes in a ' _sure'_ manner, but doesn't argue further. She's close to asking Chaeyoung whether a cuddle would make her less scared, before biting her tongue and realising that's taking it a step too far.

They manage to finish the movie without Chaeyoung having heart failure, so Jennie is allowed to pick the next one. She opts for something more mild, choosing Paranormal Activity. While she thought it was mild, apparently the younger girl thinks differently. Once again she spends most of her time cowering under the blankets. 

Jennie manages to coax her out at intervals with popcorn and chocolate, which she accepts and nibbles underneath the blanket. The older girl laughs and tells her she looks like some sort of mouse peeking her head out, and while Chaeyoung pretends to be offended, she ends up giggling too because she knows how ridiculous she's being. 

Eventually they pause the movie to order pizza for dinner- Jennie's treat seeing as Chaeyoung bought all the snacks. They vacate into the kitchen where they set the table with plates and cutlery, while Jennie lights the candles in the candelabra. Chaeyoung pours herself another glass of wine and some Coke for Jennie while the older girl sets out the ketchup and other condiments. They work so well in tandem with one another, never getting in the way or tripping over each other; it's like they can read each other's thoughts and calculate the next move. Chaeyoung smiles at their teamwork in spite of herself.

Jennie leans against the kitchen counters while Chaeyoung perches herself on the wooden countertop, absently nibbling at popcorn crumbs. She didn't have enough time to finish her lunch at work because they were run off their feet, so understandably she's starving. Her and Jennie have put their lunch dates on hold until things quieten down, but seeing each other after work is much more enjoyable. 

"So I booked the haunted house the other night," Jennie informs her. She's been waiting to tell her in person. "I hope it's still okay if Lisa and Jisoo still come?"

"Yeah, of course!" The younger girl smiles enthusiastically. "I'm so excited. I've only ever been to one haunted house but it was one we made at high school. I'm sure you can imagine how lame it was."

"I can't imagine how teenagers jumping out in shitty Michael Myers masks with t-shirts covered in ketchup to try to look like blood could pass as scary. I see your point."

"That was a surprisingly accurate description. Were you there?" 

The older girl laughs, tapping gently on Joohwang's tank seeing as he's just swam over to see her. "I know because we had one similar at _our_ school. It must be universal."

Just then, the doorbell rings. Chaeyoung squeals in excitement as she hops off the counter and dashes out of the kitchen. Jennie is left alone with Joohwang, who is eyeing her balefully.

"What?" she asks, gruffly. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

In that moment she realises some of Chaeyoung's weirdness must have rubbed off on her, because why the hell is she talking to a fish?

A few minutes later, Chaeyoung shoulders open the door laden down with pizza boxes and a bags. Jennie rushes forward to help her. She tries to arrange the food neatly on plates before the younger girl just laughs and tells her to put it on the table or else it'll get cold.

It's far too much food for two just two people, but they make the best go at it they can. Chaeyoung ordered the meat lover's pizza with extra pepperoni whereas Jennie opted for the barbecue chicken. They both share a portion of cheese fries, while Chaeyoung has the mozzarella bites to herself and Jennie has onion rings- which makes the younger girl curl her nose up in disgust. 

Jennie leans back in her chair with a groan, holding the penultimate slice of pizza in her hand. "I feel like my stomach's gonna explode."

Chaeyoung is massaging her own stomach. "If it is, please do it in here rather on than on the carpet."

Once they've finished, they stagger back into the lounge and flop onto the sofa. Neither of them particularly have an urge to finish watching the movie, so Chaeyoung turns the TV off and they talk instead. Albeit, it's been less than a week since they last saw each other, there's still a lot to catch up on. Chaeyoung tells Jennie about how busy the bakery has suddenly become and Jennie tells her about a case that her and Taehyung have just taken on. 

The rest of the evening is... nice. Domestic. Wholesome. Chaeyoung could see herself spending every evening like this with Jennie. Coming home from work, eating dinner together and then lying on the sofa talking about their days. 

She knows it's too good to last. At around nine pm Jennie takes her leave and Chaeyoung wishes she had the bravery to invite her to stay the night. But they both have work in the morning and the hassle would only make it less enjoyable. 

Another time. Under better circumstances.

***

They meet up for three more movie nights before Halloween. Jennie is always allowed to pick what they watch, and the next times Chaeyoung cooks dinner for them instead of ordering takeout. It feels much more intimate that way. 

Jennie certainly isn't complaining. 


	7. seven

On the night of Halloween, something immense hangs in the air of Manhattan. Chaeyoung notices it as she walks to work, noting how many more houses have strewn decorations out on their front doors. The girls have been told to dress up for the occasion at work, so Chaeyoung decided to go as Alice in Wonderland, which matched the theme of Jeongyeon going as the Mad Hatter. However, she will change out of her boisterous costume before they attend one of Nayeon's friend's fancy dress parties tonight.

Sooyoung comes as Snow White, which suits her perfectly. Dahyun comes in painted blue as the genie from Aladin, which leaves the girls reeling with shock and bent double with laughter. Seungwan comes as minion, which delights the little children as they nag her tirelessly to say some of their favourite phrases. To her credit, Seungwan has endless patience with them, and by the time the end of their shift comes she looks exhausted.

Chaeyoung has little time to linger, she has to get home and be ready in time for Jennie to pick her up. Jisoo and Lisa will be with her by now, seeing as Jennie finished work earlier than Chaeyoung.

It's almost dark by the time she gets home, which doesn't bode well. So far she hasn't had to manoeuvre her way around alone in the dark, but the prospect of doing so as it quickly approaches winter slightly terrifies her. Realistically, nothing is likely to happen to her, considering she lives in a good neighbourhood- but she still can't take that chance.

The girls pick her up at six, their slot at the haunted house is at half seven. They stop for McDonalds on the way. And while Jisoo is eating, a young girl nervously comes up to her and tells her she recognises her from the magazines and asks if she can have a photo. Before Jisoo can reply, Lisa heartily slaps her friend's back and tells the girl she'd be more than happy too, _and_ she'll throw in a free autographed photo. Jennie and Chaeyoung stifle their laughter at Jisoo's mortified expression, but the older girl complies nonetheless.

When they get back to the car, Jisoo sits in the back with her arms and legs crossed tightly, silently seething. "I don't know about any monsters murdering you tonight, Lisa, but I just might."

Lisa, seemingly unabashed by her friend's threat, simply snickers and continues to scroll through her phone.

They reached the haunted house with just under ten minutes to spare. Jennie, efficient as ever, guides them through the parking lot, hands over their tickets at the barrier and shepherds them into the queue waiting to go in.

Chaeyoung shivers inside her coat. "I'm actually kind of scared to go in."

Jennie looks up at her with a smile. "That doesn't surprise me in the slightest."

"Hey!" she pouts. "Even _you_ have to admit this is way scarier than watching a movie."

Lisa leans forward, sticking her head in between them both. "They're not allowed to hurt you, Chae," she says. Jennie isn't particularly fond of the way her nickname rolls off her tongue so easily. "But they _can_ chase you, and touch you. Just not hurt you."

Chaeyoung pales considerably, shrinking in on herself. " _Great_."

Eventually, after what seems like an eternity of standing in the freezing cold, they are permitted entry. As soon as they step across the threshold, they're swallowed in darkness. Chaeyoung takes a few steps back, not wanting to be the one to go in first. Fortunately, there is a large group of them- the four girls and others, so the chances of Chaeyoung getting singled out and chased is slim. But still not _completely_ impossible.

There is sections to the haunted house. The first floor is meant to be decorated like a butchers, from what Chaeyoung can detect in the dim lighting. Slabs of meat hang from the ceiling on precarious hooks, and she wouldn't like to wager whether it's real meat or simply decoration. She still cowers away from it.

The floor is eerily silent, apart from the occasional puff of the smoke machine emitting another obscuring cloud. Jisoo and Lisa overtake Chaeyoung and Jennie, buzzing with excitement and bouncing on their heels; eagerly awaiting the scare. Chaeyoung thinks they're both insane.

So far, Jennie is seemingly unaffected. Perhaps her eyes are a little wider than usual, other than that she gives off no palpable fear. Though she steps cautiously, her eyes swivelling around every few seconds.

The first scare comes when they round the corner. From under the makeshift butchers stalls, people donned in mutilated pig masks jump out, brandishing hatchets and circling the crowd. Chaeyoung's body is pressed so tightly against Jennie's that it's no wonder they don't become attached. Even Jennie seems a little scared, cowering away when one comes near her, waving the blade in her face and taunting her.

Jisoo, on the other hand, simply laughs it off. Chaeyoung can't tell if she's more scared of the people in the pig masks or Jennie's fearless best friend.

It is a good job Lisa forewarned Chaeyoung about the touching, otherwise she would've screamed in fear when one of the masked men roughly grabs her by the shoulders and begins oinking ruthlessly in her face. She screws her eyes shut, trying to blot the disturbance out and keep her heart rate steady.

After a few seconds, he unhands her and begins circling the group to look for another target. Jennie grabs Chaeyoung's hand without thinking, tugging her into the next room to get away from them. The younger girl is so terrified she doesn't even register Jennie's tight grip around her hand.

Once they have fought their way through the plastic strips obscuring the doorway, they walk down a corridor that is meant to resemble a prison. Chaeyoung squeals when a loud banging noise surprises them all. Glancing in her peripheral vision, she sees more pig people behind the bars; banging against the metal and making horrendous pig noises, their grotesque masks dripping with fake blood.

Waiting at the end of the corridor is a woman donned in an old-fashioned maid's outfit; her pig mask looks slightly more feminine has been adorned with a bonnet. She stands with her hands on her hips, a deadly meat cleaver hanging from her fingers.

"You're not going through there, are you?" She points to the doorway behind her with the cleaver. "I wouldn't, little piggies. My husband's through there and he really, really hates guests." She punctuates her sentence with a swine-like snort, before leaping forward and shouting in Lisa's face in an attempt to scare her. The girl just laughs hysterically, pushing the woman away gently.

What Chaeyoung wouldn't do for even an ounce of Lisa's courage.

The next room is made entirely of mirrors, no doubt to disorientate whoever steps inside. Stood in the centre of the room is the biggest man Chaeyoung has ever seen; dressed in a butcher's apron splattered with blood and wearing the most hideous pig mask of them all. In his hands he holds a chainsaw, also covered in blood. Chaeyoung widens her eyes, stumbling backwards into the people stood behind her. That can't possibly be a real chainsaw, right? That's not allowed. Someone could get hurt.

However, her heart drops right to the floor when she hears the familiar whirring noise.

When the man advances towards them, brandishing the chainsaw, the group splinters as they try their best to run away from him. Chaeyoung loses Jennie in the scrum, disorientated by the mirrors. It's like working around a maze, the darkness also doesn't help.

Just as Chaeyoung reaches a dead end, she whirls around and shrieks when she sees the man striding towards her. She freezes in horror, unsure of where to turn. He can't kill her, right? The chainsaw is all for show. He wouldn't. It's against the law. Even if she were to stand still and defy him, he couldn't hurt her.

Despite this mantra running through her mind, Chaeyoung still panics and tries to scramble away. The man is so wide he almost takes up the whole pathway. She screams in fear as she ducks out of his way and feels the wind from the chainsaw breezing past her.

He chases after her, his footsteps so almighty that they shake the floor beneath her. Whether it's her imagination imagining the sound of the chainsaw getting louder, she doesn't know. But she runs for her life anyway.

After skidding down a few paths, Chaeyoung sees the heavy metal door in front of her. Even though her heart is about to burst out of her chest, she continues running until she's safely on the other side, slamming it behind her. She jumps when she hears the man banging on it furiously, yet he makes no attempt to open it.

So he wasn't going to kill her after all. Good to know.

"Thank God you're back!" Jennie says from somewhere in the dark. "You were the last one left, we were starting to get worried."

Chaeyoung simply waves off her concern, too out of breath to speak. A stitch lances painfully in her side, but she allows herself to be dragged up onto the next floor where a fresh set of horrors awaits them.

This one has a more futuristic theme. This is apparent by the chrome room they are led into- like something from a spaceship. Just as they are becoming accustomed to their surroundings, there is a loud hissing noise as the room suddenly becomes encased in smoke. This time it's so thick that they can't see in front of them. Chaeyoung has to hold her hands out in front of her to feel where she's going. Someone takes her hand and begins leading her forward, judging by the brown hair she guesses this must be Lisa.

Chaeyoung is tugged into a tight tunnel, heavy blackness falling over her when she least expects it. She gasps slightly, grip tightening on Lisa's hand. She doesn't know whether she's imagining the feeling of the walls closing in on her even tighter; she's never been a big fan of enclosed spaces.

It feels like the tunnel goes on for an eternity. Someone keeps jostling into the back of her and standing on her shoes, which is infuriating, but she's too scared about what's waiting at the end of the tunnel. How are Jisoo and Lisa not terrified?

She was right to be worried. They step out into disorientating strobe lights, flashing before their eyes and obscuring their vision. Chaeyoung finds it hard to make out anything, it feels like she's walking in slow motion. She tries to latch back onto Lisa but discovers she's lost her in the lights and smoke machine.

Suddenly, someone grabs her arm. Chaeyoung gasps and tries to shake them off. The lights blink even faster and become even more disorientating. All Chaeyoung can see is a flash of black right in front of her face, but she can't make out the mask.

Eventually, they drop her arm and she tries to hurry off, but it feels like she's fighting against a current; it's almost impossible to move. She keeps bumping into people she doesn't even realise are there, but none of them are her friends.

When she bursts into the night room, it sends her reeling. It's lit up with harsh, fluorescent lighting like a hospital. Chaeyoung blinks a few times, trying to get her bearings. She's now stood in a room filled with people dressed in creepy nurses costumes. They crawl along the floor and float around the room, bearing down intimidatingly. In the centre of the room is a surgery table, where someone is strapped down onto it and screaming. Chaeyoung knows it's just an actor, but the special effects makeup and gore looks _way_ too realistic. She tries to edge her way around the crowd to see if she can find the others. She wishes they were all cuffed together, that way she'd stop losing them.

"Chae!"

She whirls around when she hears Jennie's voice. Even over the screams and rabble of the people, she'd recognise that voice anyway. Chaeyoung slumps in relief, holding her hand out for Jennie to take. She's so relieved to see her that she ignores the sparks igniting on her skin at their contact.

"I thought we'd lost you for good this time." Jennie gives her a small smile, the edges of her eyes still express worry. Chaeyoung's heart squeezes.

"Please don't let go of my hand until we're safely out of here."

"Don't worry, I wasn't planning on."

***

Amazingly, Chaeyoung manages to survive the night, though she puts that down to Jennie's protection rather than her own bravery. She's still confused as to how Lisa and Jisoo managed to walk out of the haunted house laughing their heads off, but she supposed it'll remain one of life's little mysteries. The girls are a weird pair.

On the way back Jennie stops at a Krispy Kreme, saying that all the jump scares have left her famished. The girls happily follow her out of the car. Maybe if Chaeyoung can sink her teeth into a chocolate fudge donut she'll forget being chased by a zombie with half of its jaw hanging off.

She's undoubtedly going to have nightmares for weeks after the whole experience.

They settle themselves into a booth in the corner while Jennie goes to take their orders. It took about five minutes for Jisoo to decide what she wanted, which naturally meant Lisa wanted to change hers too. In the end, Jennie just walked off and told them they'd suck it up and eat whatever she ordered for them.

"Do you have Krispy Kreme in Australia, Chae?" Asks Lisa, sipping her milkshake. Her and Chaeyoung are meant to be sharing it, but the older girl doesn't mind giving her the lion's share.

"Yeah, but American food is never good in other countries, you know? We have Taco Bell but it sucks. Nowhere near as good as here." She leans forward to take a sip out of her straw, shuddering slightly at the sickly sweetness that overwhelms her senses. Maybe she'll just let Lisa finish it.

"I'd love to go to Australia," Lisa sighs, dreamily. "I've always wanted to go surfing. Ooh, and see the Great Barrier Reef! Have you seen it, Chae?"

"A few times. I lived in Melbourne, and honestly? It wasn't that exciting. You'd love Sydney though, Lisa. You should go one day."

"Would you come with me and be my tour guide?"

Chaeyoung chuckles. "Of course."

"Do you think you ever will go back to Australia?" Jisoo cocks her head interestedly.

"I've been thinking about it," the younger girl sighs. "Probably not. Even if things don't work out in New York I'd still like to stay in America. A whole new world of possibilities has opened up to me. I don't think I could ever go back, it's not the life I want."

"I totally get it," Jisoo nods knowingly. "Besides, we'd be sad to see you leave. You're part of the group now."

Chaeyoung flushes with pride, trying to suppress a beaming smile.

Jennie comes back over, laden with boxes. Despite her scolding, she has ordered Lisa and Jisoo all the donuts they asked for. Jisoo throws her arm around her neck in thanks and Lisa blows a kiss across the table. Jennie purchased a separate box for her and Chaeyoung to share, seeing as they are less greedy than the other pair. Chaeyoung dives straight into the strawberry shortcake donut, groaning in satisfaction.

"I wish we could make these at work," she remarks, wiping her sticky hands on a napkin.

"Maybe you could start?" Jennie suggests. "And then _Angel Delight_ will be a huge chain, bigger than any Krispy Kreme. You could be the CEO."

"I'll be the taste tester!" Interjects Lisa.

"I can be the decorator!" Jisoo plays along. "I could advertise them on my shoots too. What about you, Jen?"

"I'll be in charge of advertising. I'll put billboards all over New York and soon... the world." Her heart clenches when she sees Chaeyoung smiling widely at her. It's the little things it takes to make Chaeyoung so happy.

"I could probably mention it to Jeong tomorrow," Chaeyoung taps her chin thoughtfully. "She's always looking at new ideas."

"Please do," Jennie rips apart her glazed chocolate cake donut. "It's way more convenient to get them from your bakery than driving all the way here."

"Sometimes I wonder if you're only friends with me for the free food."

"Jennie gets free food?" Jisoo chokes. "Why don't we? Jeongyeon always makes me pay full price!"

Jennie shrugs and smirks. "Guess you just don't have my natural charm."

 _Or maybe it's because Chaeyoung is head over heels for you_ , Jisoo thinks internally. _But whatever, I'm not going to rat her out._

Jennie leans across the table to wipe some icing off of Chaeyoung's cheek. The younger girl flushes, mumbling a thank you and trying to maintain her composure. Lisa catches Jisoo's eye, and they both subtly roll them. If Chaeyoung and Jennie aren't a couple by Christmas then they're going to have to knock some sense into them.

On the drive back, Jennie brings up the topic of their Friendsgiving.

"So, I was thinking we could have it at my place," she suggests, glancing over at Chaeyoung. She's doing it for the younger girl, so her approval is needed. "I figured since I have the most space and my apartment is kinda halfway between everyone else's."

"That's a great idea!" Beams Chaeyoung. Truthfully, she'd have been happy just cooking for the four of them at her place, but if Jennie has other plans then she won't intervene. "Who were you thinking about inviting?"

"You guys are the guests of honour obviously. But I was thinking the other girls too, I know they don't do a lot for Thanksgiving either. I thought it'd be nice for us all to come together this year."

"Totally! I think this is such a good idea." Chaeyoung squeals excitedly. "I can't wait for you to try my pecan pie, I've been working really hard on it. Wait, do you eat that over here? Or do I need to make pumpkin? I'm sure if I ask-"

"Pecan is perfect," Jennie laughs. "Don't stress it. Between us, we'll make it perfect."

"What about us?" Lisa pokes her head in between the front seats. "What are Jisoo and I gonna do?"

"Behave yourselves for a start." This earns Jennie a clip round the ear from Jisoo. "Fine, fine! Jisoo you bring your cranberry sauce. Lisa... I know what your cooking is like. You can organise decorations."

"Ooh, yay!" The youngest girl falls back into her seat. "I'll start as soon as I get home. How do you feel about a turkey piñata, Jen?"

Jennie sighs.

***

Surprisingly, Jeongyeon is all for Chaeyoung's donut suggestion. They talk about it in detail before they open up, wiping down the kitchen surfaces. Jeongyeon says she'll look online for some recipes and she'll invite the girls over to her apartment to test them out first. She's an all or nothing kind of person- if they're not perfect, she won't have them in her bakery. All of the experimental recipes are tried and perfected in her own kitchen. Chaeyoung gladly agrees. Even if they don't get it right the first time, it'll still mean free food.

That week, Chaeyoung has a very difficult time restraining Dahyun from getting the Christmas decorations out. The blonde girl is adamant that after Halloween is the best time, so they'll get optimum usage out of them; eventually, Seungwan has to step in and tell Dahyun she must wait until after Thanksgiving. This causes the younger girl to sulk for the remainder of the afternoon.

Jeongyeon invites the girls round to her apartment that Saturday, telling them they'll order takeout and she'll get wine for them. On the Friday before, Chaeyoung manages to catch her boss before they close up. The rest of the girls have gone, thankfully, as this is _not_ something Chaeyoung wants them to hear.

"Hey, Jeong? Can I ask you something?"

"Sure. What's up?"

"Um..." Chaeyoung looks down at her feet. "Is it okay if Jennie comes tomorrow? Funny story, the donut idea was actually hers. It's totally okay if not, if you just want it to be a work thing-"

"Chae, quit rambling," Jeongyeon laughs. "Of course Jennie can come. I'll invite Nayeon too."

"Oh!" Chaeyoung hadn't really been expecting that. "Great! Thank you so much. I owe you one."

Her boss frowns. "You don't owe me anything, you goof."

Chaeyoung practically sprints home, not being able to contain her excitement to tell Jennie. She hasn't had chance to see her yet this week, considering both of them have been busy with work. They'd made plans to meet up at the weekend, but they hung in limbo. Until now. If Jennie can't make it then Chaeyoung will be upset, but she'll understand. She knows how hard Jennie works. 

**Chaeyoung (4:27pm): want to come to jeongyeons with me this weekend? its kinda a secret but i'm sure you'll enjoy it :P**

**Jennie (4:31pm): omg yes!! ofc. tell me when and where and i'll be there**

Chaeyoung can't help the silly smile that threatens to split her face.

**Chaeyoung (4:32pm): you wanna pick me up at 3?**

**Jennie (4:34pm): it's a date**

***

Nayeon catches downwind of Jennie's invite to Jeongyeon's, which she's excited about. She'd never admit that she gets nervous around Jeongyeon- she doesn't want to lose her edge- so knowing Jennie will be there gives her some confidence.

"Do you think it's getting serious with Chaeyoung?" Asks Nayeon over their coffee. They have a fifteen minute break before they return to work. Nayeon chased Taehyung and Seokjin out of the staffroom so they could gossip in peace.

Jennie pulls a face. "No! We're just friends. I mean, I'd like to get serious. Maybe? I don't know how Chaeyoung feels. Is it too soon?"

"It's been two months," Nayeon deadpans. "You've been on plenty of dates. Jisoo told me how you played the knight in shining armour on Halloween-" Jennie makes a mental reminder to strangle her best friend the next time she sees her, "-what _are_ you so afraid of?"

'Losing her' sounds too cliché, though it has an air of truth.

"That I'm not good enough for her," Jennie admits. "That I'm not who she thinks I am or what she needs. I've never had a serious girlfriend, Nay. Everyone I _have_ been in a relationship left me. Maybe I'm never meant to be with someone."

"Don't give me that, Jen. That's bullshit and you know it is." Nayeon pokes her gently with her foot, swinging her legs off the edge. "You're an amazing girl with so much to offer. Chaeyoung seems really into you- everyone can see it apart from you. Sometimes life is all about taking risks. If you want Chaeyoung, just tell her. One day you might be too late."

Jennie takes a sip of her coffee. Truthfully, she's terrified. She's never had to confess her feelings to anyone before. Jongin was the one who asked her out, her boyfriend afterwards did the same; and the girl she briefly saw in college didn't even admit her feelings, it just sort of _happened_. Jennie was hoping that would be what happened between her and Chaeyoung, now it's looking like it'll be a lot more complicated.

Is Jennie's pride getting in the way? Absolutely.

Will she admit that? No way.

"Want me to talk to her?"

Jennie chokes on her coffee, Nayeon leans forward and thumps her on the back. "No! God no! I-I'll figure it out. Just let me do it myself."

Nayeon shrugs. "Suit yourself. But don't leave it too late."

With that, she saunters out of the room.

***

Jennie picks Chaeyoung up at the time promised. Because it's November, the younger girl is already bundled up in a hat and a scarf which makes Jennie's heart physically ache. She pulls playfully on her scarf, causing Chaeyoung to half-heartedly swat her hands away with a giggle. Jennie doesn't point out the younger girl's rosy cheeks or red nose- she wants to admire them in privacy. Chaeyoung would only be embarrassed. So the older girl has to keep sneaking looks in her peripheral vision.

Jeongyeon's apartment is a short drive away, but she asked them to pick up some ingredients before they arrived. Chaeyoung is in charge of the donut toppings, which her and Jennie delight in. They go a bit wild in the supermarket; filling their basket with silver and golden balls, sprinkles, fresh fruit, marzipan, dipping dots and chocolate sauce. As Jennie tosses them in, she cheerily tells Chaeyoung that if Jeongyeon doesn't want them, they can always share them at their next movie night.

They haven't had one since before Halloween, but Chaeyoung is trying to find the right time to offer. So far she hasn't had an invite to Jennie's apartment, apart from at Thanksgiving. A small part of Chaeyoung reckons that Jennie like her home more than her own. This fills her with an indescribable amount of pride.

They're the last to arrive at Jeongyeon's, much to everyone's amusement- particularly Nayeon's. Chaeyoung is still intimidated by her, but after seeing her underwear when she passed out the fear isn't as paralysing anymore. They manage to exchange warm welcomes to one another (Jennie had reassured Chaeyoung previously that she held no grudges after Operation 2yeon considering how well it worked out.)

Surprisingly, Jeongyeon loves all the baking decorations they bought; promising to use every single one of them. That's the fun of experimentation, you can work with anything to see if it's right. Truthfully, Chaeyoung has reservations about the silver balls; they're her least favourite topping on account of the fact they have the ability to crack your teeth, but she didn't have the heart to tell Jennie no. Especially not when the older girl was being generous enough to pay for it.

"The secret of the perfect donut lies in the dough," begins Jeongyeon, rolling up her sleeves. She's supplied the other girls with aprons- even Jennie and Nayeon, though they sit at the table nibbling the snacks Jeongyeon has laid out.

"It's almost as if the clue's in the name," Sooyoung says sarcastically. When her boss shoots her a glare, she quietens down.

"I made some dough last night because it needs to be left to cool overnight, but I need your advice. Especially you, Seungwan. The rest of you can just work on finding the right fillings and toppings. We need unique but tasty combinations."

"Apparently my suggestion of bacon and maple syrup wasn't good enough," Nayeon rolls her eyes.

Dahyun looks affronted. "I can see why, you animal."

Chaeyoung claps her hands together, suddenly struck by inspiration. "I could make a strawberry one and put rose petals on top and call it The Rose!"

"Yes!" Seungwan nods enthusiastically. "Ooh, can we make champagne flavoured ones and call them The Rosé?"

"Before you get too ahead of yourselves, remember we've got to actually make them first," their bosses teases.

Jeongyeon has taken the liberty to print and laminate them all instructions on how to finish their donuts. Chaeyoung takes her fifty gram blob of dough and begins shaping it appropriately. Her and Dahyun are sharing a baking tray, so Dahyun flours it and Chaeyoung lathers the dough balls in oil. They cover the tray with clingfilm, as the instructions say to leave for four hours. Chaeyoung had no idea how strenuous this work was going to be. Though she supposes it'll pay off once they've perfected it.

While Jeongyeon and Seungwan work on the dough, Chaeyoung takes a notepad over to the table where the rest of the girls all come up with different flavours and combinations. Jennie's suggestion of an ice cream donut sounds excellent in theory, but tricky in practise. Chaeyoung will have to convene with Jeongyeon to see how possible this will be.

Although the younger girl doesn't outwardly express it, she desperately wants to make Jennie her own donut. She doesn't know what she likes, though. Obviously she can't ask her, that would ruin the surprise. She wants to surprise Jennie with it one day; she can already picture handing her the box with flourish.

So far they have:

_Strawberry shortcake_

_Champagne/The Rosé_

_Strawberry/The Rose_

_Prosecco_ (?) (Nayeon had nagged Chaeyoung until she agreed to scribble it down.)

 _Pineapple_ (Sooyoung's contribution, much to the other's horror.)

_Bacon and maple syrup_

_Citrus_

_Chocolate fudge_

_Coconut_

"I'd love to find a good mint chocolate donut," sighs Jennie wistfully. "I don't think they exist."

Suppressing a smile, Chaeyoung writes: _Mint chocolate_ in bold letters.

"I can't wait to think of cute names for them," Dahyun leans back in her chair. "Like, the coconut one can be Caribbean Paradise."

"Or 'Disgusting'," shudders Nayeon. "If someone gave me a coconut donut I'd beat them up."

"We could call the bacon one Sweet But Salty?" Supplies Sooyoung. "Damn I'm a genius. I think I might pack this up and go to Yale or something."

"I don't think they accept college drop-outs!" Jeongyeon calls from the kitchen, causing Sooyoung to scowl.

"Ooh, a cherry one!" Chaeyoung says. "We could call it Chérie. A double entendre."

"I love it," Jennie grins. "And you could ice little love hearts onto them."

"Yes!" They raise their palms and slap a high-five. Nayeon flickers her eyebrows up, but manages to clamp her tongue. She knows Jennie would never forgive her if she said something in front of Chaeyoung.

Time passes quickly after that. After they've experimented with all the ingredients in Jeongyeon's cupboards (consequently turning her kitchen into a bomb-site) they decide to call it a day and retreat into the lounge. Jeongyeon orders them all takeout pizza, after much deliberation (and squabbling on Dahyun and Nayeon's front). Chaeyoung curls up on the sofa next to Jennie watching the other girls bicker with a fond smile on her face. It still baffles her how quickly these people have become a found family. She can't ever imagine life without them- especially the girl beside her, who senses her staring and offers her a shy smile. 

To pass the time, Nayeon chooses a movie for them to watch, but their hearts aren't in it; they talk over each other, laugh explosively and Dahyun and Sooyoung start to get boisterous, wrestling on the floor. Jeongyeon nudges them with her foot and tells them to knock it off, but her tone lacks conviction; she's too involved with Nayeon, who is snuggled up to her. Chaeyoung watches with barely concealed jealousy. She wishes she was brave enough to make such a move on Jennie. 

Seungwan suggests karaoke, and everyone leaps onto the idea. Jeongyeon goes into her bedroom to unearth her karaoke machine, while Nayeon nominates herself to go first. Chaeyoung shrinks into the background, hoping nobody calls upon her. Singing to strangers on the subway is one thing, performing in front of her closest friends is a completely different matter. The only person in the room who has heard her singing is Jennie- the other girls have only heard her humming under her breath in the kitchen or while she's wiping down tables. Chaeyoung makes an effort not to sing in front of them. 

Nayeon chooses a Beyoncé number, which she's surprisingly good at. It seems that Chaeyoung isn't the only person who didn't know she could sing- Jeongyeon is the most impressed out of them all. When Chaeyoung asks Jennie about it, the older girl shrugs and says she's never heard her do karaoke sober before. 

Seungwan is next. She has the voice of an angel, but Chaeyoung already knew this; she's heard her singing plenty of times at work. They all cheer uproariously once she finishes singing the John Legend song. She bows deeply, blushing to the roots of her hair. 

"Chaeyoung next!" Sooyoung says loudly.

"Yeah!" Dahyun rounds on her. "I've never heard you sing before."

Chaeyoung sighs deeply, pretending not to be embarrassed when everyone starts applauding her. She ducks her head behind her hair, taking the microphone from Seungwan who whispers an encouragement before sitting down. 

Chaeyoung selects the song Complicated by Avril Lavigne. It's been one of her favourite songs ever since she was a little girl- it was one of the first thing she learned to play on her guitar, she remembers performing it at her middle school talent show and winning second place (first place went to a boy who could juggle five bowling pins.)

Taking a deep breath, Chaeyoung tries to blot out the sounds of encouragement behind her. It'll only distract her. As pathetic as it sounds, she feels the need to prove herself to her friends. They know of her dream to become a musician, if she doesn't give a good enough performance then they'll only doubt her. 

It's strange to not sing it without her guitar, solely focusing on the lyrics. Towards the end of the song, Chaeyoung is playing air guitar anyway. The other girls get off their seats and join her; playing air guitar and leaping around wildly. Once the last note has finished, Chaeyoung drops to the floor and poses exaggeratedly like Mick Jagger to the applause of her friends. They cheer her name and clap loudly. 

"Chae-young! Chae-young! Chae-young!"

It means more to her than any stadium cheering her name could.

***

Before Jennie drops her off that night, she offers to walk her all the way to her door. She feigns casualness and tells Chaeyoung that she just wants to make sure she wants to get in safely, but they're both fully aware of what she means. Chaeyoung is more than happy to extend their company, so agrees. 

The nearer they get to Chaeyoung's door, the cagier Jennie acts. The younger girl tries to ignore it- perhaps it's just her imagination. If something was wrong with Jennie, surely she would mention it. Or maybe not. Chaeyoung keeps forgetting that the older girl doesn't owe her anything.

"Hey," Jennie says softly once they reach apartment thirteen. "Can... can we talk?"

Chaeyoung nods, the growing lump in her throat makes it hard for her to speak. "Sure. Do you want to come inside?"

Jennie looks like she's deep in consideration, before shaking her head. "I... Maybe it's not for the best. Look, I want to give you this." She reaches into her pocket and places something in Chaeyoung's hand. When the younger girl looks down, she sees a laminated card on her palm. She stares at it in confusion, looking to Jennie for guidance.

"You know that bar we went to with Jisoo and Lisa? Well they told the owner that you were a singer and that you'd be interested in playing there one night. He gave me his card to give to you." Jennie inhales shakily. Chaeyoung is still perplexed. "I-I've had the card for a while, I-I just didn't know how to give it to you. I'm really sorry I kept it from you."

Chaeyoung knits her eyebrows together. "Jennie," is all she can manage. "I... Thank you, for giving me this." She tucks it safely in her back pocket. "Honestly, I don't even know if I'll call him, but I'll think about it at least."

Jennie looks down at the floor, afraid to meet the younger girl's gaze. "I'm sorry. If you're mad I completely understand. I just... it sounds so dumb, but I thought you'd want to do it on your own- that you didn't want favours from anyone else. I know you're headstrong like that." She weakly smiles, and suddenly everything is okay again.

"Thank you for thinking that," smiles Chaeyoung shyly. "You're right to a certain extent, I guess. I'll think about it. When I make a decision, you'll be the first person I'll tell."

The older girl grins. "I expect a front row seat _and_ a backstage pass."

"Of course. Anything for my favourite manager."

Jennie can't help it, she lets out a loud laugh. "You're so annoying." 

They hug goodnight before going their separate ways. Chaeyoung doesn't give the business card a second thought while she's getting ready for bed. Jennie is all that consumes her mind. She wonders why Jennie was so conscious about Chaeyoung being mad at her; she wouldn't have the capacity to be angry at the older girl even if she tried her hardest. 

Before she goes to bed, Chaeyoung twirls the card around her fingers a few times in consideration. 

She'll sleep on it. 


	8. eight

On Thanksgiving morning, Jennie is awake at dawn. This is unintentional, but it works in her favour. The first thing she does is FaceTime her mom, who, even though lives in Seoul, wishes her a happy Thanksgiving and asks what her plans are. She knows she isn't spending the day with her father, but Jennie hasn't celebrated it with him since she was a teenager. Mr Kim doesn't celebrate Thanksgiving, the only holidays he tolerates are Christmas and birthdays. Jennie learned long ago to not let herself get upset by it. Besides, she'd much rather be spending the day with her friends rather than the strained atmosphere of her father's home.

"Is that girl going to be there?" Her mother inquires, wiggling her eyebrows.

" _Mom_!" Jennie knew it was a mistake telling her mom about her crush on Chaeyoung, she didn't think she'd be teased so mercilessly when she confessed to it. "Of course she's going to be here, it was her idea after all. I just want everything to go well for her sake. It's her first Thanksgiving and I want to make it special."

"It'll mean the world to her you're putting in all this effort," Mrs Kim consoles her.

Even on the other side of the world, her mom knows exactly the right thing to say to ease her anxiety. Jennie feels tears welling in her eyes as she feels longing lancing her heart. She'd give anything to have her mother here with her now, to be held in her arms while she stroked her hair and whispered that she'd be fine. No matter how old you get, you'll always need your mother- Jennie learned this the hard way.

Jennie tries to firmly steer her mother away from the topic of Chaeyoung, asking her about how business is going, whether her co-worker is still a bitch and what her plans are for Christmas.

Mrs Kim has only ever stayed in New York for one Christmas, when Jennie was in her first year of college; the trip was an unmitigated disaster and her parents came to the mutual agreement they would spend the holidays apart from then on. Both of their jobs are too demanding to celebrate frivolous holidays, thus meaning Jennie was brought up with the same sentiment. While she always makes an effort to see her father on Christmas Day, she doesn't understand the month-long hype that precedes the day itself.

Lisa, whose favourite time of year is Christmas, has tried to enlighten her to no avail. A few years into their friendship she stopped trying, deeming Jennie as Scrooge. This always makes Jennie burn with indignation, because had her upbringing been different she would love it too.

Jennie bids her mother goodbye after chatting for a while longer, checking the time and realising that if she wants to be ready for when Jisoo arrives, she better get a move on. Getting in the shower is her first priority, as it is most mornings. She just about has time to apply some base makeup which she'll touch up when Jisoo comes and takes over some of the duties. There's no way she's meeting all of her friends with no makeup on.

 _There's no way you'll let_ ** _Chaeyoung_** _see you like that_ , the little voice in her head reminds her. She tries her upmost best to ignore it, accidentally poking herself in the eye with the mascara brush in frustration.

Jisoo knocks but lets herself in anyway. Her and Jennie's friendship transcended barriers long ago. By the time Jennie makes it into the kitchen to meet her, her friend has already started pulling all of the appropriate equipment out of the cupboards and is rolling her sleeves up determinedly.

"Remind me why you have so many cooking utensils when you never cook?" Jisoo asks, not turning around from rooting around for a mixer.

"Because I knew I needed to be prepared in case a day like today ever occurred." The younger girl moves across the kitchen to join her friend, finding the utensil in the correct place. She remembers her dad buying it for her when she first moved into her apartment, and apart from making cupcakes with Lisa once, she's never used it.

"Why did I think it was a good idea to help cook for thirteen people?" Jisoo blows her hair out of her face, cheeks reddening already with stress. "I can barely cook for _myself_."

"Relax," Jennie puts her hands on Jisoo's shoulder and gives her a mock massage. "We've got this. Because who are we?"

"Jensoo." They slap palms and then return to the task at hand.

Jisoo has already made her cranberry sauce at home as to save one job. Jennie has had the turkey in her freezer for a few days, as well as buying the ingredients to make mac and cheese and mashed potato. Chaeyoung and Jeongyeon are in charge of desserts while Seungwan and Sooyoung are bringing a few Korean dishes. Lisa has taken her role as party planner and decorator extremely serious, tapping her nose and refusing to answer any of Jennie's questions when she inquired about it. To say Jennie is nervous as to what she has planned is an understatement.

"What time are Chaeyoung and Lisa getting here?" Asks Jisoo.

"Lisa should be here any minute and Chaeyoung in like an hour. The rest of them are coming about one pm and we're eating at four."

Jisoo makes an impressed noise. "You've really taken this to heart, huh?"

Jennie shrugs. "I just thought it would be a nice thing for us all to do."

"I thought the whole point of this was for Chaeyoung?"

The younger girl blinks. "Well, yeah, I guess. I just didn't want to say it aloud 'cause I knew you'd make fun of me."

"Maybe I would've done if I hadn't met Chaeyoung, but I really like her. I know you do too, so I can't make fun of you for that. It's obvious she likes you too."

Jennie keeps her eyes focused on her hands, not daring to get her hopes up. She knows Jisoo is just lying to avoid hurting her feelings, when really, filling her with false hope is much crueler.

Her best friend continues. "I know you deny it because you're scared, but she really does. Whenever you look away she looks at you with this lovesick expression on her face, her eyes go all wide and her face goes soft. She looks at you like you're the only person in the room- the only person who matters." Jisoo's voice is soft now. "You have no idea how lucky you are for someone to look at you like that."

Jennie's face crumples as she brings Jisoo in for a one-armed hug, her hands are covered in flour so she doesn't want to ruin her friend's sweater. "Anyone who has you is the luckiest person in the world. You'll find someone, Jisoo. Maybe a lot closer than you think."

Before Jisoo can question her cryptic choice of words, the front door of the apartment is being swung open forcefully, which can only announce Lisa's arrival.

"Oh my god!" Jennie shrieks. "Lisa, did you bring a live turkey into my apartment?"

"Jennie," Lisa stops dead, giving her friend a flat look. "Would I _ever_? It's stuffed, and he's called Gobbles so please treat him with respect."

Jennie clutches her chest, where her heart is racing. Trust Lisa to bring the most lifelike plush turkey she could find. She brandishes it proudly, hugging it to her chest and pretending to make it peck Jisoo.

The rest of Lisa's decorations are a lot more sensible (apart from the turkey piñata, which Jennie didn't even think existed) consisting of pumpkin spice candles, actual pumpkins and gourds, paper chains in the shapes of leaves, paper turkeys and wreathes of leaves to wrap around the cutlery. Jennie has to concede, she's done an amazing job. When she puts her mind to it, Lisa can actually be a genius; it's just her goofy personality that often gets in the way.

Because both older girls deem it unsafe for Lisa to be in the kitchen, they set her with the task of decorating the apartment. At first, she protests and insists she makes herself useful in in the kitchen, but after some force from Jisoo, she grumbles under her breath and goes off.

While both of them are experienced cooks, around mid-morning both girls begin to realise that they've bitten off far more than they can chew with their plan of making enough food to feed thirteen. Even when Chaeyoung comes to give them a hand, it's still overwhelming. Jennie can't tell whether she's flustered because of the heat in her kitchen or because her and Chaeyoung keep grazing hands when reaching for cooking utensils. They keep sharing secret smiles with one another, bu when Jisoo catches them and tells them to stop flirting the moment is ruined.

"Oh my god!" Chaeyoung exclaims when she goes to the bathroom. "Jen, is there a turkey in your living room?"

Lisa shouts something indistinguishable from the dining room, though Jennie reasons it's probably better she doesn't pick up on what's said. She's going through enough stress today.

By the time their guests have arrived, their dinner is nearly ready. Joohyun and Seungwan are the first to arrive, Jennie predicted this with how organised her friend is. The older woman is nearly always the first one at the office and always the last one to leave at night, Seungwan is the same in the bakery. Chaeyoung and Jennie often remark on how well-matched the couple are, as opposed to Nayeon and Jeongyeon who are polar opposites of each other. This is highlighted when they arrive at Jennie's apartment and are already squabbling, though it's obvious it lacks any real vitriol. Despite the fact they're officially dating now, they will never stop bickering over trivial matters.

"It smells amazing in here," Nayeon compliments, accepting the glass of champagne Jisoo pours her. "I thought you would have burned the building down by now."

"How many times have I told you I'm a good cook?" Pouts Jennie, looking up from whisking.

"I haven't tried it yet so the jury is still out," her friend retorts, poking her tongue out. Jennie curses her under her breath and urges Jisoo to usher them out into the lounge where Lisa and Chaeyoung are providing entertainment. She vaguely remembers Lisa mentioning something about bringing her Wii so they could play Mario Kart and her blindly agreeing, not having been paying attention in the first place.

Jisoo comes hurrying in, transferring plates from the kitchen into the dining room. All they have to wait for is the mac and cheese, but it remains pale and listless in the oven, not having crisped up at all. Jennie, who is one push away from a breakdown, quickly extracts herself from the situation to go and get changed. She can't sit down to eat in her baggiest hoodie and bleach-stained sweatpants.

In the time it takes her to put on her best sweater and designer jeans, Jisoo and Chaeyoung have laid out the rest of the table and somehow managed to salvage the pasta, Jennie is struggling to understand how. Perhaps she isn't as good a cook as she thought she was.

"Wow," Chaeyoung blinks when she sees Jennie on the threshold. "You look really nice, Jen."

Jennie isn't sure whether she's imagining the sudden pinkness on the younger girl's cheeks.

"Thanks." She does a small twirl. Chaeyoung claps enthusiastically. "I didn't want everyone to think I was a slob."

"For the record, I thought you were a very cute slob. You'll have to let me borrow your hoodie sometime it looks super cozy."

"You can have it!" Jennie blurts. _Take my whole closet, take my car, take whatever you want._

What does Jennie have to hand over for the younger girl to get the hint?

To avoid further embarrassment, Jennie hurries into the lounge and merges with the other girls who are squabbling as to who sits where. Nayeon and Lisa are bickering over who gets to sit on Jennie's right side, considering Jisoo has already occupied the left space and looks extremely smug about it. She tries to convince the girls to have a dance battle which they seem to agree is a good idea before Jennie intervenes and tells them to do rock paper scissors instead, which for some reason didn't occur to them. Lisa wins, much to Nayeon's dismay. 

Chaeyoung nestles in between Dahyun and Sana, directly opposite Jihyo. She hasn't spoken to her since Nayeon's birthday but remembers how well they got along, she's determined to become friends with her. Jihyo, amicable as ever, seems not to mind. 

Before they eat, the girls pray to keep tradition, though none of them are particularly religious. Jennie, who sits at the head of the table, leads it; though it's painfully obvious she has no idea what the correct thing to say is. In the end, she hurries an 'amen' to save herself from humiliating herself even further. 

"Wait!" Yerim cries. "We haven't said what we're thankful for yet!"

"Ooh!" Sana claps her hands together. "Let's go around the table. Jennie, you start."

Jennie widens her eyes, perturbed at being made to go first. She's still recovering from her botched attempt at leading the prayer. She swallows roughly, trying to think of something clandestine that won't reveal her true emotions. Because there's only been one thing she's truly thankful for this year, and it's sitting four seats down from her, with a wide smile on her face. 

"This year I'm thankful for being successful at work and paying off my student loans. I'm thankful for being able to spend so much time with my friends."

Scattered applause ensues before Jisoo takes her turn, talking about her wonderful job opportunities and how many new places in the world she has visited. Lisa's is along a similar vein. The other girl's are much more standard; happy for job promotions, healthy family members, good friends and new opportunities. Then it's Chaeyoung's turn. It's obvious she's nervous by the way she wipes her palms on her skirt, tittering awkwardly when Dahyun hands it over to her. 

"Um, I don't really know where to begin. So much has happened to me this year that I don't really know where to begin. I guess I'm the most thankful for an amazing opportunity to start a new life in New York and how well it turned out. I'm thankful for making so many amazing new friends and starting a new job that I love. I enjoy every single day here and that's what I think I'm the most thankful for." 

Instead of a half-hearted clap, the girls give Chaeyoung a proper round of applause. Jisoo stands up and the others follow in suit, Jeongyeon whistles and Lisa starts stamping her feet. It takes several moments for them to calm down, at this point Chaeoyoung is swallowing down the cyclone of tears forming in her throat. Although she couldn't express it properly, these girls mean the world to her. None more than the girl sat at the head of the table, watching her fondly.

Their moment is quickly forgotten when the other girls sit down and begin helping themselves to food. Soon, the dining room is filled with loud laughter and the scraping of cutlery on plates. Lisa takes a few photos of them all and her decorated table, which she makes everyone compliment before she's satisfied. The stuffed turkey is perched in the windowsill, watching over them with glassy eyes. 

"Guys, this food is amazing," Sooyoung wipes her mouth with the back of a napkin. "I had no idea you could cook so well! You should come and work in the bakery!"

"It was mainly all Jennie," Jisoo waves a hand in her best friend's direction. "I mostly supervised."

"Is there anything you can't do?" Asks Jihyo, meeting Chaeyoung's eye across the table and winking discreetly. She chokes slightly on her turkey, causing Dahyun to thump her roughly on the back.

It seems like everyone has caught onto how Chaeyoung feels about Jennie, apart from the girl herself. 

Chaeyoung falls quiet, allowing the lull of conversation to wash over her. Poking her food distractedly, she tries not to keep glancing over at Jennie who is talking rapidly to Joohyun about something that sounds work related. Seungwan is chatting to Yerim, the two well acquainted through Sooyoung. Then it hits Chaeyoung, that no matter how much she loves her new group of friends, she still feels like an outcast; suspects she always will. Jennie is the only one who makes her feel like the most important person in the world, hanging onto her every word and giving her her undivided attention. And it just feels _natural_. 

While she's helping the other girls clear the table, Chaeyoung vows to herself that, if nothing has progressed between her and Jennie, then she'll be the first one to admit her feelings. If Jennie doesn't reciprocate, then at least she'll know where she stands. 

At this point, it doesn't matter if Jennie doesn't feel the same; Chaeyoung just needs to get it off of her chest, it's been eating her alive for weeks and if she doesn't come clean soon she thinks she's going to crack under the pressure. 

Though it would be mortifyingly embarrassing, Chaeyoung truly doesn't think Jennie would stop being her friend because of it. Their bond is too deep now, it's going to take more than that to sever the tie between them. Feelings can be ignored and repressed, friendships are much harder to break. 

Jennie tells the other girls to go into the lounge and set up the Wii while her and Chaeyoung tidy up the kitchen. Chaeyoung is soaking and scrubbing the pans while Jennie loads the dishwasher, whistling to herself as she works. Chaeyoung ducks her head, hiding behind a curtain of hair so the older girl can't see her goofy smile. 

"Did you enjoy your first Thanksgiving in America?" asks Jennie. 

"I loved it. Thank you so much for going through so much effort for me. I really don't deserve you." Chaeyoung clumsily hugs her, trying not to let her wet hands touch her back. Jennie just laughs, wrapping her arms tightly around her without abandon and squeezes her. Chaeyoung hopes Jennie can't feel her heart thundering through her chest. 

"You deserve it," the older girl says. "Do you know what I'm the most thankful for this year? Meeting you." 

Chaeyoung freezes, feeling her heart leaping in her throat. She's aware of her knees trembling, unable to keep her upright much longer, having to lean against the sink for support.

"I feel the same," she says quietly. "You've made my life so much better, Jen. I would hate it here without you." 

Jennie bites the pillowy part of her cheeks to stop a face-splitting smile taking over her features. She turns her focus back to the dishwasher, not wanting to embarrass the younger girl by continuing to gush. 

"I'm glad we feel the same way."

***

Although it's an hour before opening time, there's still lights on and signs of activity in the club. The scraping of chairs and tables rings through the otherwise silent street. Chaeyoung stands in front of the building, shivering inside her trench coat as a harsh wind picks up. Even though she's reluctant to enter, the warmth of the club is undoubtedly better than being outside in the cold. Without second thought, she ducks her head and makes her way inside.

At first glance the place appears to be empty, yet she's certain only moments previously she saw a shadow moving around. Clearing her throat, Chaeyoung tentatively steps forward and cranes her neck around. She begins to wonder whether she dreamed the whole thing, like some kind of mirage.

"Hello?" She calls, fiddling with the card in her fingers. 

"Hello!" A voice calls from the otherwise empty room. A head pops up from behind the bar, causing Chaeyoung to stumble backwards and clutch her chest in surprise. The man chuckles, straightening up and drawing to full height. Chaeyoung hurries over to him.

"Hi!" She greets breathlessly. "I-I didn't think anyone was here. Sorry I just walked in..."

The man waves a hand. "No problem. You don't look like you're here to party, so what _are_ you here for exactly?"

"Actually, it's pretty weird but someone who works here gave my friend a business card because she told them I'm a singer." Chaeyoung places the laminated card on the polished bar. 

"That was me!" The man says brightly. "I'm Baekhyun. Yeah, I remember your friends. They told me what an amazing singer you are and I was intrigued, I thought you were never going to come! It's nice to meet you. Chaeyoung, yes?"

"Yes," she nods rapidly, taking his hand and shaking it enthusiastically. "It's nice to finally meet you. I'm sorry it took me a while to get in touch, it was just a lot to think about. But I'd like to perform here if you'll have me."

Baekhyun smiles, resting both hands on the bar and leaning forward in interest. "I'd be thrilled to have you. But I'm sure you understand that I can't hire you without hearing what you sound like."

"Totally! I could play for you now, if you like?"

Baekhyun nimbly hops over the bar with the confidence of an athlete or a man that does it regularly, crooks his finger and beckons Chaeyoung to follow him. She does so without question, already feeling out of her depth. No matter how many hours she spent labouring over the offer, in this current moment she feels like she's done the wrong thing. 

They make their way over to the stage at the end of the room, already set up for the night. Apparently it's owned by a man named Johnny, if the labels are anything to go bye. Baekhyun clambers up and holds his hand out for Chaeyoung to follow, consequently leaving her even more flustered. 

"I don't have any guitars but maybe you could sing something acapella?" Baekhyun hands her a microphone.

Usually Chaeyoung has no qualms about singing without backing, considering that is how she learnt to sing in the first place before she could play any instruments, but the pressure of the situation is causing her to doubt herself. Baekhyun's expectant stare is only heightening her anxiety. Before she takes the mic, she wipes her hands on her jeans and swallows roughly. 

"Is there anything you want me to sing in particular?"

"This is totally up to you." He takes a step back. "Take your time." 

Chaeyoung blinks a few times, wetting her lips and coughing slightly. She did a few vocal practises when she was still at home so she's not totally unprepared, yet it's hardly the ideal situation. Perhaps she doesn't want to pursue being a singer if it means feeling constantly put on the spot like this. 

" _On the corner of main street, just trying to keep it in line_ ," she sings. " _You say you wanna move on and you say I'm falling behind_."

She gets halfway through the song when Baekhyun cuts her off with a wave of his hand. Chaeyoung is so nervous that her voice cracks, messing up her note. Pressing her lips tightly together, she hopes Baekhyun doesn't notice this. His expression is indecipherable, she anxiously awaits his verdict. 

"Well, Chaeyoung..." His voice sounds distant. Chaeyoung's blood runs cold. The mic trembles in her hands. Then, Baekhyun grins widely. "You've got the spot!"

"Really?" Her body feels limp. "Are you kidding? Wow! Thank you so much! This is amazing!"

"No, thank _you_. Your voice is beautiful, it gave me the chills. Look." He rolls up his sleeve and reveals the gooseflesh and raised hair on his arm. Chaeyoung's throat goes so tight it feels like it's spasming. She had no idea her voice moved people like that. The butterflies in her stomach flutter against her stomach violently.

"How would you like to come on Thursday night? Say nine pm?"

"I'd love to!" Chaeyoung exclaims breathlessly, clapping her hands together in delight. "Thank you for the opportunity. I won't let you down!"

"They're going to love you. Don't forget to bring your guitar, I can't wait to hear you play."

Chaeyoung leaves soon after that, barely aware of the cruel gale that has picked up, stinging her skin. With a high-pitched squeal of excitement, she leaps up and punches the air triumphantly. 

***

"What?" Jennie gasps. "You got the gig?"

They're talking over lunch the next day, Chaeyoung decided on a Cantonese place she's been wanting to try out for a while and Jennie was more than complacent though she's not the biggest fan. She's grateful that Chaeyoung's big news is an excuse to abandon the food on her plate.

"Yeah!" Chaeyoung grins. "I went last night to talk to Baekhyun and he said I could perform on Thursday! Can you believe it?" 

"Of course I can, you're such a talented singer that anyone would be lucky to have you play for them. But I didn't know you were thinking about it."

"I've been thinking about it for the while, I only didn't say anything in case I chickened out last minute," the younger girl admits sheepishly. "I'm glad I did though. Maybe it could be the start of something much bigger?"

"Maybe," Jennie agrees pensively. "Either way, I'm really happy you got the job."

"Would you... like to come with me? I understand if you don't want to because of work-"

"No!" blurts Jennie. "No, I'll definitely be there! I wouldn't miss it for the world, Chae. I want to be there for your first performance. Well, your first _official_ performance. I've been there from the start and I plan on being there until the end." 

Chaeyoung ignores the warmth oozing across her chest, setting her skin alight. It's hard finding her voice after such a raw confession from the older girl. Things like this keep slipping out between them, only making things more tense and confusing. It feels like at any moment things will reach a crescendo. However, both girls keep repressing this feeling of unease and pretending to carry on as they usually do. 

"That means so much to me," smiles Chaeyoung. And it does, more than Jennie could ever comprehend. 

***

Backstage at the club is an unmitigated disaster. Staff members constantly yell at one another, Baekhyun runs around like a headless chicken trying to maintain some order, and his business partner Kyungsoo glides through the halls like an ominous and disapproving spirit. When everyone senses his presence, they quieten down and remain discreet. Chaeyoung included. When he puts his head around her dressing room, he stares at her coldly for several seconds, leaving without saying a word. She tries not to let herself be unnerved, Baekhyun already forewarned her about him. 

The closer it gets to nine pm, the worse her nerves get. Chaeyoung hasn't performed in front of a big crowd in years, way before her college days. Busking in the subway is different considering half of the people don't pay attention, but tonight all eyes will be on her; every mistake and slip-up closely scrutinised. Baekhyun told her if her performance goes well he'll consider giving her a regular spot at the club, only heightening her anxiety by a tenfold. So far she's chugged two bottles of water to prevent herself projectile vomiting everywhere. 

It gives her little solace knowing Jennie and Lisa are in the crowd, eagerly anticipating her. Jisoo couldn't make it on account of the fact she had to fly to Hawaii for a photoshoot, but she sent Chaeyoung several text messages wishing her good luck, conveying her excitement to see her perform when she returns home in the near future. Knowing two of her best friends are out there cheering her own should calm Chaeyoung down, but the prospect of making herself look like a fool in front of Jennie is even more petrifying. 

Baekhyun comes in to tell her it's only five minutes until her performance, wishing her luck. Chaeyoung nods mutely, staring into space and evaluating every poor life choice that led her to this exact moment. She wishes she'd never stepped out of her comfort zone, that she was at home watching Netflix from the safety of her couch. Some people are meant to be singers, and she isn't one of them. 

In a sudden moment of clarity, Chaeyoung remembers why she came to New York in the first place; to pursue her dream and make a better life. If she doesn't seize these opportunities then it will have all been for nothing. More than anything, she wants to prove to her family that she has the capacity to do it. That their concern over whether she was doing the right thing was misplaced. Chaeyoung has a point to prove, and tonight she's determined to begin proving it.

Slinging her guitar over her shoulder, she walks out onto the wings of the stage where Kyungsoo is announcing her as the next performer. Polite applause fills the club, her stomach roils in anticipation. From the sidelines, she spots Jennie and Lisa straightaway; right in the middle of the fray and two rows away from the stage. She tries to catch their eye for reassurance, but they're too busy whispering to each other to realise. 

When the spotlights go up, this is her cue. She walks onto the stage and waves shyly at the audience, a few of them reciprocate. Jennie and Lisa jump up and down waving madly, Lisa even begins chanting her name but is quickly stopped when Jennie clamps a hand over her mouth. 

Chaeyoung takes her place in front of the microphone, adjusting it slightly because she's smaller than the last person who performed. Once everything is in place, she strums her guitar experimentally a few times and begins singing. 

" _Well I only bought three, what you looking at me for_? _Dressed in white and putting off crying_..."

Once she's actually singing, everything melts away and Chaeyoung only focuses on the music and the thrill of adrenaline buzzing in her blood. After her first song, she pauses to catch her breath and is startled by the sudden raucous applause that explodes from the audience. Her surprise must be evident because a few people begin laughing. Glancing in her peripheral vision, she sees Baekhyun on the sidelines giving her the thumbs up. 

The next song is an acoustic rendition of a popular Ariana Grande song which sends the crowd wild, especially Jennie who has stated multiple times it's one of her favourite songs. Chaeyoung feels lightheaded with excitement, it's like she's floating. 

" _I thought I saw a man brought to life, he was warm, he came around like he was dignified_..."

"Oh my god!" Lisa whispers to Jennie. "I told her to play this one! It's one of my favourites."

Jennie barely hears her friend, too enthralled with watching Chaeyoung's performance. Her angelic voice warms Jennie inside out, like being enveloped in a warm hug. Like her presence, her sweet tones are reassuring and strong; irresistible and enticing. Though Jennie has heard her singing other genres of music, acoustic performances is what she excels at. Watching her on stage is like being in the audience at a polished pop star's concert. She was born for this. Of course she will succeed. With this much talent, how could she not?

Chaeyoung performs three more songs and then her slot is over. When she takes her final bow, the audience explode into raucous applause- Jennie notices, with pride, that it wasn't this loud for any other act. Her heart feels like it's about to burst out of her chest with delight. Chaeyoung is red-faced with happiness and unable to stop beaming, hiding coyly behind her hands. The applause is still going strong even when she walks off stage, where Baekhyun is waiting to greet her with a hug. 

"You were incredible!" He says loudly over Kyungsoo's amplified voice. "The audience loved you and so did I! The regular spot is yours if you want it."

"Are you kidding?" She gasps, eyes widening to such an extent it feels like they're going to pop out of her head. "Of course I want it! God, thank you so much, Baekhyun!" She pulls him in for another hug. "Thank you!"

"Go and enjoy the rest of your night. Your friends have been dying to talk to you," he winks. With a grin, she hurries into the dressing room to dump her guitar then runs back into the club to meet Jennie and Lisa.

"Chae!" They squeal in unison, enveloping her into a bone-crushing hug that knocks the wind right out of her. She doesn't care. She's on cloud nine and nothing can bring her down.

"You were _incredible_!" Jennie emphasises her points with her hands. "You looked like a pop star up there." 

"The guy next to me was _crying_ , that's how good you were," Lisa gushes. "I got a little teary-eyed too when you played Torn. How do you manage to do that with your voice?"

Chaeyoung hides behind her hands. "Guys, stop," she whines. "I'm gonna cry."

Jennie grabs her wrists and pulls them away from her face to smile up at her. "I'm so proud of you. I know how nervous you were, but you went out there and killed it anyway. Do you want a drink? It's on me."

"I do!" Lisa interjects. "Can you get me martini? Do you want one, Chae?"

"I have work in the morning. You can have one on my behalf."

Lisa darts into the crowd and wrestles her way to the bar, leaving the two girls alone. Jennie has been waiting for this moment ever since she saw Chaeyoung walk on stage, wanting to praise her for her bravery and hard work. 

"Baekhyun said I could have the regular spot here," announces Chaeyoung, leading Jennie over to a quieter corner. Normal music has begun to play on the sound system and people are flocking to the dance floor already. She still finds it strange how people will party every night in New York without needing an excuse. 

"What?" shrieks Jennie. "You're kidding! I knew you could do it, but wow!" 

When they fall into a hug, it feels natural. Chaeyoung has become accustomed to the softness and warmth of Jennie's boy pressed against her own, just that bit taller than the older girl so she can rest her chin atop her head. This time, she allows herself this small pleasure. It makes it even more exhilarating. Chaeyoung's heart beats a rapid staccato. 

Jennie leans up on her tiptoes and presses a gentle kiss on her cheek. Chaeyoung stares at her in astonishment, mouth going slack in surprise. Before she can respond, Lisa is barging in with a cocktail in her hand, already talking about a creepy man who tried to flirt with her at the bar. 

Later that night, when Chaeyoung is getting ready for bed and taking her makeup off, she sees the ghost of Jennie's lipstick print on her cheek. Gently, she reaches up to touch it and smiles to herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is largely unedited, sorry! :)


End file.
